What's your take on my situation?

hey guys!

since you've all been so helpful, I think it only fair to give you an update with my situation:

So on Thursday we had a chat on fb. The first 30 min it was just normal chat, some joking, after that I've decided to go for the number, because wanted to see, if there could be something more. I didn't want to ask for the meeting cause I don't want to arrange any meetings with a girl that is more than 2 days away.

So I've said: "Hey, would you give me your number, so I could talk to you besides online?" (a ruff translation from my language, but still pretty accurate)...

Then the silence comes.. she says: "hmmm..."... Two minutes passed and still no response. I've asked if she's still there, she said: "I am, just a sec, brb." Two minutes later she says: "I don't know whether to give you my number, I'm so confused, if I tell you sincerely..."

Then I've decided to be also opened about it and tell her what I think: "Well, you seem like a fun person and I'd like to know you better, and I don't want to stay just at fb chatting."

I said: "You can tell me, I'm a big boy, I can handle it", she replies: "I really don't know, omg I'm sorry I'm making such a big deal out of it, I know I'm rude. You do seem like a fun guy to talk to, but I'm totally confused right now."

Then she says that she's in a situation in her life where she doesn't know where she belongs, sometimes she wishes, that she wouldn't exist and so on (you gotta consider that she's emo - as the subculture, and I don't mean that in an negative way).

And then she said, that the last thing that she wants is to hurt anyones feelings.

Then I've realized that persisting for the number would make me a douche bag so I've just said: "OK, then lets leave it as it is, we can still stay in touch", and she agreed.

So that's what happened. After that I had to end the conversation, because I was getting late for job (and not because it made me feel uncomfortable to continue to talk to her).

To tell the truth, I was and still am disappointed on how it worked out, but on the other hand I'm glad that I know where I'm at with this girl.

And also, the type of the girl that I'm looking is that she doesn't have such drama in her life,that she has her sh** together.

I don't know about you guys, but I still appreciate her honesty about the whole situation.

What do you think?

If you like the drama, still connect with her from time to time without pushing.

I will say this too. Us girls sometimes like complicating things, like being pursued. In a way, it weeds out the guys who are just after us because it just so happened that we're a girl and shows the guys who are after us because they truly like us. Of course, that isn't a guarantee but that's that.

If you're just picking up girls anyway, it shouldn't matter. You can still have fun with others and she could relax where you're concerned.

Well, I don't like to pursue a girl, if she doesn't show that she likes me too and she wants to see that I'm really interested.

I don't mind that sometimes, to get something good in your life, would take some time to acquire.

But if this isn't the case, I won't be persistent, because I'd feel embarrassed and used that I let myself being led by a girl who just likes attention.

As I was reading your post about this girl, she is quite a "mind-boggling" thing. I mean, she turn things around and can't decide whether to give you her number or not. Or she may be gaming you too. It's quite a dilemma though if she likes you or some sort of an attraction happened between the two of you, she has no reason why to complicate things up. I also think she is confused at the moment whether to go out with you or not. One question, is there another guy who's sarging on her besides you?

You shouldn't have been so easy on her. When she all started getting dramatic you should have said, "Well it's been fun chatting with you, but this relationship isn't going anywhere. You can pm me when you decide to get serious"

well, it seems she liked me when we first met, but after that, it's beyond me to know what she's doing/thinking/feels.

about another guy, I don't know really. Well the only thing I know, it's that one day I saw her having written on facebook status: "I wanna talk to you, but you're not here :='(" and one day, when I talked to her, I mentioned that she seems in a good mood today, and she replied that it's because she'll meet with a friend of hers who she hadn't seen for a long time.

perhaps he could be one of them, I dunno.



well, I wouldn't say that this relationship isn't going anywhere, cause there was no relationship yet. Or perhaps you understand the term relationship differently than me.

When she started rambling on about "not giving out her number", if I were in your shoes id have said something in the lines of "We have allready exhanged saliva, why not numbers ?" or something like that. If she isnt giving you back the attraction that you want, go find someone else that will.

There are two problems, but they are both somewhat the same.

You need to be dating, talking to and meeting other women.

You would be much more 'attractive' if you were busy and didn't have time to chat with her online, or worry about what she is doing or what her status is.

Bill

to answer your first statement: I'm not sure how appropriate that line would be. It sound arrogant. Hopefully I'm wrong, but if i was a woman, I'd understood this line like: "So, the only thing you want from me is making out and getting physical..." do you understand what I mean?.

For the other statement: yes, I gotta find some1 who will return the attraction

Yes, I agree that I wouldn't put so much weight on just this girl if I had more options and I do realize that this is one of the main problems that I'm facing right now.

But at this point in my life, this still isn't the case, I'm still not able to meet 2-3 new woman on weekly basis with potential of having something more....

If you're focusing on this one girl, the tendency is that you will end up in frustration by not even getting her number. I find her very complicated. You're making a move to get near her, but she is trying to keep herself away from you. And if you tend to lie-low from her, she seem to get near to you. What really is her take on you? I don't see any rejection from her. For me, she doesn't have a stand on you.