farked up big time...i think

a few hours after a talk with my ex-girlfriend ( where i assumed whole responsibility for the break up ), i text her if she's good with having breakup sex sometime. she replied "c'mon, what do you take me for ?" ( she has a rebound relationship ) to which i replied that it is ok, that i understand, i crossed the line and apologized if she was offended by that and that i do hope we can be really good friends.

from your expertise, how bad did i farked up ?

well idk. this isnt something about pick up. this is psychology and whether she liked it or hated it! more than likely. yeah she is pissed off. i mean but fark i did it to my next. i mean she turned into a flaky bitch after me but we are still pretty cool

Well as far as the pick-up "rule book" you pretty much did everything against the rules. First you took responsibility for something that there was no reason to address unless she brought it up. Then you untactfully tried to get sex out of it, when she was in a really bad emotional state, then when she refused, you tried to beg for a second best position.

Don't feel too bad, most if not all of us have done all of the above at least once. That's an honest assessment of what I read above. The best thing is to pick yourself up and move on. Learn from your mistakes so you don't have to make them again.

If you want some specific advice on your case, or want some advice on where to go from here, just ask. We are a pretty helpful bunch around here.

its true. but oh well hse is an ex! u just failed to get sex! probably about 90% of the guys on here are on here after a breakup that hurt them very badly! so no biggy. ur fine cause all those guys probably tried the same thing. ill be honest. that happened to me almost exactly the same

thank you for the support, guys. i really appreciate it. and i made a plan for myself.

1) cut off contact with ex for the next 1 1/2 months - 2 months
2) allow myself to let the wounds heal. meaning that i'll allow myself to think about her ( and everything that comes with it ) for the next ten days instead of pretending everything is a-okay but in reality is not. after that, i'll get back in the game big time ( i'm in a rock band, so it should be easy... it was easy before,why shouldn't it be now ? ) and since me and my ex are in the same social circle, i think it will be quite the social proof when she sees me being approached by hotter babes than her. ( btw, the rebound guy's sooooooooo beta, so that's a good start and i'm glad, actually )
3) learn from the relationship management dvds from lovesystems, so i know i won't make the same mistakes again in the next relationship...if i do want to get in one
4) improve my inner game big time and making myself the best a man can be EVER.
5) initiate contact with the ex again after said period of time for a cup of coffee or something. by this time, i'll be over her and she'll sense that...and i'll game her badly...again....wit h the Mindset that she wants me

any other suggestions?

you have the right idea. get over her, and build a new frame. i mean start by being the fun guy that gets out and has girls all over him. get hotter girls to come around but also dont sleep with them (in front of her). and by that i mean if she meets them and you are around her, dont fark them. she wont like it. fark them when your not around her. but yes the basic idea is to build a new frame. look at the things you did wrong and fix them but you want to make it seem like after her your interpretation of reality changed.

so go jump off some cliffs into water, go a state away for a crazy house party and then always be posting these fun crazy times on facebook. trust me, if she has facebook and sees that ur constantly adding new photos or having fun and all that. she will want to be a part of it again. but when she does, let her. dont just stop doing what you were. if you get back with her dont fall back into the same stuff you guys used to do. start making new memories that are fun and all that

understood. and is it a good ideea to tell her friends that i'm going to a relationship management seminar?( it's re-framed, of course. i actually learn from the dvd's mentioned above ). Because it doesn't feel like me if i say to her that i did all those things...it might come off badly as "me trying to impress her", or worse, "look, i've changed" ), instead, if she'd heard this from somebody else might have a bigger impact ( communication channel : my best friend->his girlfriend->my ex (or my ex's best friend->my ex)). but will it work re-framed like that? or actually telling her that i did and that it for myself and for the benefit of my next serious relationship? ( implying to her that she lost, not me ).

am i proceeding correctly or are there any more better suggestions?

in addition to that, me and my band are (hopefully) going to open for our biggest national rock band in a few weeks.thinking of bringing a good friend of mine slightly hotter than my ex to act as my girlfriend.