So I've just finished reading The Mystery Method, after finishing The Game a few days ago. I've never been into the club scene before so I've been trying to find someone to go with just to familiarize myself and become a bit more social.
No luck so far, but I've been keen to get my foot in the door of trying out pickup so I went down to the mall today on my own. I've practised Mystery's photographic memory routine and also had the jealous girlfriend opener and question game in mind.
My intention today was mainly to get over Approach Anxiety, so I was prepared and willing to get shot down, and was reminding myself "nothing that happens in the field is a big deal", to just let it go and try this stuff. Consequences be damned.
The first thing I set about was buying a notepad for the memory routine. I didn't know where the newsagent was and so used this opportunity to warm up by asking a cute girl - "Excuse me, do you know if there's a newsagent around here?"
To my surprise the girl was very helpful, almost eager. She gave me lots of detail, initially saying "well it's not really a newsagent, but there's this place over there... no wait, actually there's a newsagent upstairs... [explains where to go]". She could have so easily been much more brief or even just said "Sorry, I don't know". IOI.
Unfortunately, I wasn't sure how to respond to this unexpected opportunity, and my being self-conscious about that even meant that I wasn't 100% listening to her. She may have noticed that, not sure. Afterwards I came up with "Cool, thanks. You were really helpful, more than most people. I like that. I've really got to get going, would you like to get coffee sometime?"
I'm guessing that's not great, but better than nothing. Has anyone here been in a situation like that and turned it into something more?
I found the newsagent and bought myself a notepad. Then I walked around for a fair while. There didn't seem to be many opportunities. I also suppose I was unsure whether I wanted to try opening a set of people or just try and approach other women on their own. I was walking around with the notepad in my hand, and wondered whether that would seem weird. I was also getting self-conscious about whether anyone had noticed that I walked past the same places.
Finally I decided to just go up to the next girl I saw. It ended up being this older girl, maybe 30 (too old for me; I'm 21), but I didn't realise the moment I saw her and said "right, I'm going for it". I need the practice anyway. I started with "Excuse me", gave a false time constraint, asked if I could get her opinion on something, and proceeded with the jealous girlfriend opener (the one where a guy has photos of his ex in his bedside table). She seemed a bit uncomfortable but willing to respond out of politeness. She said the guy needs to get rid of the photos, even burn them if that's what the girl wants. I found that surprising, thanked her for her opinion, and moved on.
I was somewhat happy with the fact that I hadn't completely chickened out, which I thought I might, and there kinda was the approach with other girl before as well, so I decided to start walking back to my car. On the way, I saw a giant chessboard with people playing and some spectators. I decided to sit by and watch. I figure the principle about building comfort and familiarity with clubs kinda applies here too. Clearly I need to get out more :-).
The chess game finished, and I got up to continue back to my car. I looked over my shoulder, and in the opposite direction there's a cute girl just standing, doing something on her phone. I remembered something I heard today "if you hesitate, you masturbate". I talked myself into trying another approach.
Similar story as before; tried the jealous girlfriend opener, she wasn't very interested, but played along. At one point while I was talking she looked down at her phone for a few seconds and did something. IOD. Turns out she also said the photos had to go, completely, not just moved out of the bedside drawer. I didn't push for much explanation because I could see her discomfort.
Well then, I'd say that was an acceptable first try. Bit of a shame that I couldn't do more with the first girl, but I'm trying to condition myself to Mystery's advice - "nothing that happens in the field is a big deal".
I have a question for those with experience with the jealous girlfriend opener - do most people agree with the girls above? Do they say a guy must destroy the photos of his ex? Or is that just the easy thing to say when they're not interested in the conversation?