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  1. #1
    Link777 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default What went wrong with girl at this party.

    Hey guys so basically this a combination of a field report and a ask an expert question. Today I went to this party where everyone was drinking and having a good time. I then see this girl who I sort of know and decide I want to get with her. I immediately go cocky funny and talk to her a little bit and then I start to hit on her friend and ignore her. She then proceeds to pay my friend attention, but she still looks back and gives me ioi's. Throughout this whole time I have been using alot of kino and she had been very receptive. I then start talking to her and we begin to play a game of tag. I then run into an empty dark room, and automatically sit on the bed while she gives me tons of kino. I then walk with her into this closet and shut the door, I then hug her, she laughs and I remove her hair from her side and kiss her neck (poorly though because my mouth was super dry. She seemed receptive to this so I ask "would you like to kiss me?" she then says "Uhhhh I have to go" and then she runs out. When she runs out of the room everyone asks me what happens and I immediately go cocky funny and say she raped me as a joke to avoid awkwardness. Anyways what did I do wrong?

  2. #2
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    Virgil is offline Moderator / PUA All Star
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    Default Re: What went wrong?

    What happened is that you overthought what to do. She was receptive to you kissing her neck in the closet, so you thought about going for the kiss and how Mystery told you to do that. Mystery uses this line when he's sitting besides a girl and he's only kinoed with his hands. If she's comfortable with you kissing her neck while isolated, don't ask her if she'd like to kiss next time. She wants to. If you ask her, thoughts will start to race through her mind as to why she shouldn't kiss you. Besides, it's rather strange to kiss her neck and then basically ask for her permission to kiss her lips.

    BTW you played.... tag?

  3. #3
    SuperDry is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: What went wrong?

    Hey.

    I just read about a possible explanation for this in "The Tao Of Badass".

    It has to do with Interaction Map. I can't post the outline of it because I'm not allowed to before I made 150 posts but maybe someone else would. It's a map of attraction, qualification, rapport, and seduction if you know about it.

    Basically you built the attraction, qualified her, and proceeded to the seduction stage. From your description of what occurred throughout the night with the girl, it might be rapport that you're lacking.

    In "The Tao of Badass" it goes on to explain that there's this red zone for people utilizing the seduction stage that will stop your approach. The red zone is when the girl's emotional side is dominant over her logical brain, but because the brain realizes that she's being very emotional at the moment, the logical part of it triggers some sort of danger alarm. It's like a failsafe within everyone to stop them from making some of the possible worst decisions of their lives. To counter this, the book plainly states that emotional trust is what you build in the rapport phase and that the goal is not to simply work around the red zone but to simply eliminate it through rapport. The more rapport you build, the safer she would feel with her emotions, and the lesser her resistance would be to your advances because of that trust.

    "Seduction = Sex + Emotional Response" - The Tao of Badass

    Hope this helped.

    - SuperDry


    p.s - I just PM'ed you the Interaction Map.





    [Mod: here's the Interaction Map]

    Last edited by Virgil; 07-08-2012 at 07:21 AM. Reason: Added Interaction Map

  4. #4
    Link777 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: What went wrong?

    Thanks for all your help guys. Haha yes Virgil I did play tag. I'm a college student and it seemed like a good way to run into a random dark room inconspicuously. I think you guys are probably right about not enough rapport and asking her made her mind race and reconsider. I'll def not make the same mistake the next time.


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