Five BIG Rookie Mistakes that cost me a night in Paris... or at least in a French Girl
*P.s. Long post, but it was fun writing it.
*P.p.s. Now that I see it all written out, I'm starting to think I fumbled a fools-mate xD
This was several months ago (Feb 2012) only a few months after I first started studying PU, had just read Mystery Method and my game was waaay amature – but I was just in a post about gaming foreign chick so I decided to share a story when I got boob, but didn't close; got to the bedroom but left almost immediately.
I was at a college international leadership conference held at a camp facility with lake-side cabins and whatnot. On the way over I taught the cube routine to my wing and my pivot, gaming the other girls in our van and getting Alpha status with the guys.
We get to this camp and start settling in. There's a crowd of about 100 gathering at the lake before announcements, so I grab my wing and a few other guys from my cabin and start headin walkin down. I am IN state at this point, feelin pretty good and leading a growing pack of a dozen dudes into the heart of this crowd – parts like a sea for us to approach the HB's at the center, and I'm the tip of the spear.
I open a two-set, then intro my wing, Neg and Disqualify them for going to a rival school, roll of to open an adjacent three-set, back to my wing to merge them all into a five-set. My wing stumbles his game and ejects, but I'm in the zone: getting IOIs from a ringlet of five HB 6 – 8s with a wolf pack of about 20 guys giving me further social proof – status reached: Bromander-In-Chief.
Hola! Ni hao! ...Bonjour voila!
At the end of the first day of seminars – I spoke enough Spanish and Chinese to game most of the girls there and/or just walk around being sociable – there is a bonfire beside the lake. I take it in turns to open each of the HB sets with one question in mind – do they party? By asking “so I heard somebody broke the college rules and brought alcohol (both I and my wing did) – was it you guys?” I get glum results: all seven of the Spanish chicks are too professional for my time frame, the two Russian girls party often – just not at conferences, the Chinese girls... they just don't.
Disheartened and oblivious to my surroundings I sit down next to an (not so H)B4 who is talking animatedly with some guy, on her other side her friend is looking bored. The guy knows me and gets my attention – I didn't recognize him in the dark – now it's me and the mixed 3-set. I start talking to the bored friend, she's from France, I'm taking a French class, fluff fluff fluff Neg, fluff, DHV DSQ, fluff, then she starts b1tching about how ridiculously strict the conference rules are – I neg. We get a little anti-authority conspiracy thing going.
Then we talk about the lake fluff, we should go swimming at night – they'd hate that! We should find whoever brought alcohol – they'd hate that more! Turns out she brought a little rum O.o as did my wing... and I have three bottles of wine at the cabin... We should get drunk and swim at night – they'd hate that the most! She's down for it, I can tell. But I see hesitation. I disqualify / dare her, then run some cold reading to comfort that hesitation out of her. Then we head for the cabin.
AFC Move #1 & 2: Wussing Out
We swing by the cabin to pick up my wine bottle. I tell her she has to stay outside as per the rules – she defies my sh1t test of course. We take the bottle to the edge of the lake for a few swigs, always with that sensual tension in the air that precedes the never-spoken question: what will we wear to swim?
So we strip down for the water. She in her leopard print panties and bra, while I'm like fark it, I'm getting neked! We wade out slightly tipsy into the water, but oh-no! The first flaw in my plan: a shallow drop-off. Thirty meters from shore and the water isn't even waste deep. Then here's where I make it:
Error 1: With her practically naked, and me fully so, I appeal to her for our next move (DLV) she wants to linger in the water under the moonlight, and only in hind-sight do I catch the IOIs, the subtle, subconscious invitation for me to escalate kino. I should have (no pun intended) had the guts to turn toward her, run a quick give me your hand riddle, then “you just thought about kissing me” gambit. But I wussed out in my bashfulness, and not wanting to offend the modesty of a lady I brought us back to shore.
Error 2: Sitting on the shore, still as fully undressed as ever, we take a few more swigs. It crosses my mind to escalate kino – I take her hand for the riddle and she holds back a smile (another IOI I only see in hindsight) she's alone in the woods at night with a stranger, a naked man – a fragile situation – and I wuss out of kissing her again, excusing myself as a gentleman.
We get dressed and take the bottle with us for a walk. Wandering past the now burnt-out camp fire (it's 12:30 by now) and finding out way to the actual swimming area (where it is really deep enough to swim.
AFC Move #3: Engaging her Logically instead of Emotionally
We sit at the beach for a while and my game remains tight – I wasn't too phased by those first two blunders as I didn't really recognize them as such until I relayed this story to a PUA friend who is much better with IOI's than I was at the time.
We fluff a bit more and this is one of the first times I feel my natural game beginning to manifest. Until I start to run out of things to say – not just out of canned material and cold-read routines, but I can not for the life of me think of any topics of mutual interest that have not already been milked dry – and any cocky-funny-random stuff would have built me waaay too much comfort to keep her attracted.
So I play it cool, laying back in the sand with a soft freez-out I can see only one move left before the friend-zone check-mate. I fluff about how body language is slightly different in diverse cultures but still pretty similar, for example: “I saw you thought about kissing me” gambit. And like a charm she says, “yes, I did.” Without a word I sit up and look at her playfully, holding it back, dangling the string in front of the cat... after a few moments of kissing (which btw, French kiss from a French girls taught me things I didn't know lips could do to one another) I decide to token resist.
Error 3 : Token resistance should be a light push, not a full stop. Like a self-friend zoning AFC I say: “I don't want you to feel uncomfortable, so let me know where your boundaries are for tonight.” BANG! That's the sound of me shooting myself in the foot. “Well, I don't want to have hook up with you tonight.” I asked for it. Asked her to define her threshold at the start rather than simply raising it all the way to the finish.
I get her top off – amazing “personality” btw, tear-drop, my fav shape – but the third-base coach was not flagging me in as I fumbled for a button. At about 1:30 we call it a night and head back to our respective cabins to sleep before the next days seminars.
AFC Move #4: Missing an Opportunity
After text gaming her throughout the day she wants to go canoeing on the lake – so my wing grabs a chick to share a canoe with as well and we agree to meet on an island to drink his rum. My girl and I find our way to an island, but my wing never shows. We make out a bit then I push her off and we head back in.
She says she wants to walk in the forest. I think I know what this means, so I say I want to swing by my cabin first – I don't plan for us to ever get to the forest and neither does she. We walk into a dark cabin, totally abandoned, and sit down on my bed. Just before we kiss, she notices behind me one bed occupied by my Chinese roommate named Teng he sits up and greets us pleasantly.
Error 4: Failure to be awesome. What I should have done was turned to Teng and said: “Teng ni hao wode pengyou! Wo xihuan nige nanren. Ni qu ma?” - which is Chinese for “Hey Teng! So... I have a chick here. Would you leave?”
But I didn't. It would have probably been a closing move, but I didn't want to insult Teng. So we just walked through the woods, and returned for dinner when the ground proved too nature-ey to do anything on.
AFC Move #5: Falling to LMR
We arrived at dinner pretty drunk – after killing a bottle of wine – and sat at a table with some of the college advisers (escalated our on-going anti-authority conspiracy). Then there was to be a dance party a few hours after dinner. My wing, and six other guys in the cabin came up with an intricate plan to get us all laid (we abandoned the plan almost instantly upon arriving at the dance party.
My chick took a few shots of rum before leaving her cabin, then a few more with me. By the time we arrive at the party, she's pretty plastered and starts grinding on me in a way that they can't show on cable before 11:00pm – in a way that gets us kicked out of the party to be put in college-time-out. Furious she storms out onto the grounds and I steer her towards her cabin. Half-way there and we are making-out hard core against every tree and bench we pass (both pretty drunk).
Error 5 : I fight for every meter as I try to edge her toward the cabin – all she wants to do is make out against the trees. Finally we're up against her front wall, and I stretch to catch the door with my finger tips and swing her inside. Before I can get her onto a bed she says “I have to pee first! Wait outside,” I thought it was a sh1t test then – so I defied and waited inside – now I know it was LMR.
I don't know if she passed out, but about 10 minutes later she comes out, almost surprised to find me there, grabs me by the hand and drags me stubbornly back toward the party.
We get about 50 meters from her cabin before my shock at this sudden change in her demeanor. I try to get her back to the cabin, but she is insistent on the party. I eject, but then return after a few begging texts, only to find her insistent on not going anywhere near her room. I bail for the night and compare stories with the other guys around the fire.
One by one we trickle in – there were only five of us in total who managed to hook any of the HB's. Three never made it past making out – two of them barely even got there. An hour after the party ended the fifth of us walked up looking weary...
In the morning she apologized for being a tease. Maybe she was sincere, maybe not. Irrelevant.
Moral of the Story
Go to conferences often. The “7-hour rule” gets cut in half under these liberated social conditions. This is a great place to run a full game in a day or two – perfect for finding those darn sticking points.