Top 10 Stats
Latest Posts Loading... Loading...
Loading...
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Results 1 to 10 of 10
  1. #1
    Sean Flaherty is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 94, Level: 1
    Level completed: 88%, Points required for next Level: 6
    Overall activity: 5.4%
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Maine
    Posts
    28
    Points
    94
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    10

    Default HB8 said " I dont know" after I asked her out

    Alright first things first, this girl goes to my college she went to my high school, we have the like 2 classes together up in the college.

    Straight to the point, she knows who I am blah blah...anyway I was with my buddies and they saw her and they told me I would never have the balls to talk to a girl like that so.I went ahead and approach her and ask her out. Initially when I approached, she was laughing, smiling and appeared nervous started playing with her nails, headphones hair, looking at the floor etc..., she was smiling the whole time, so I told myself just to ask her out, we both were laughing and I tested some Kino and she responded positively.

    As soon as I ask her out, there is this dance coming up I told her that we needed to go, and instead of going out and eat that she should cook me some food It would be fun she said "I don't know" and started walking away, so I grabbed her by the shoulder and said "ahh cmon lets go" and she said " I don't know" and I said " Look at me, and tell me no" she looked at me in the eye quickly then looked straight down, and she still said " I don't know". I didn't wanna appear weird or needy so I just said " Listen, think about it and then lemme now"

    Now, next time I see will be on Monday. I was just thinking to tell her like a take it or leave it like ex: " Am I piking you up at 7 on Friday?" OR I could say " Listen, its either a yes or no, or I'm gone.

    Any thoughts, comments? What should I do?

  2. #2
    whitedragon is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 15,299, Level: 79
    Level completed: 90%, Points required for next Level: 51
    Overall activity: 99.0%
    Achievements:
    Social10000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    1,032
    Points
    15,299
    Level
    79
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    675

    Default Re: HB8 said " I dont know" after I asked her out

    You asked her to cook you food! Huge effort from her. I would say no too! Had you said 'let's go grab a quick coffee later' or 'i found this incredible cafe that serves delicious Italian food - they have great gelato too - are you free tonight? Let's go there and have a quick bite, I like chatting with you and it's a fun place to hang out' she might have said yes. As it stands you have pressured her into cooking for you and being your partner at the dance with no attractive offer of yourself or strong enough offer of why she should invest so much effort. You have delegated your male leadership potential onto her by asking her to provide you food. It's like a caveman asking the cavewomen to go out and hunt mammoth for him. Or treating a girl likes she is out if a 1950's sitcom. You have to make it easy for her, not give her an assault course or you have to learn to cook like a restaurant and offer to cook for her and sweep her off her feet. Casual coffee, drink or meal is far easier and what you really want is to escalate awesome conversation not pressure her with tasks and commitments. Take the lead man. Dont give her an ultimatum of yes or no - give her a really attractive offer that is easy for her to accept. Don't be afraid to reverse it if it could get you laid 'ok ok ok how about I cook for you, I'm pretty good at fusion cooking, but help me out and bring some fruit for desert'. But cooking for a first date is overkill and you would really have to be a good cook to pull that shit off well. You want a no pressure offer of great conversation, yummy food or smooth drink and good ambience. Couple of dollars spent at a funky cafe is better. Easy.

  3. #3
    Sean Flaherty is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 94, Level: 1
    Level completed: 88%, Points required for next Level: 6
    Overall activity: 5.4%
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Maine
    Posts
    28
    Points
    94
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    10

    Default Re: HB8 said " I dont know" after I asked her out

    Yea your right. Since cooking some food is a little overkill, I was thinking I should take her to a casual meal, maybe bring my pal and have her bring one of her's? If she doesn't we could just go out for coffee have some good conversation, get to know each other a little more.

    I was kinda worried about the dance too, should I take her out for a meal a couple days before the dance or on the day of the dance? The dance isn't until a couple weeks, I am also a little confused why she didn't say no on the spot?

    Jeeze this is like my first date since freshman year in high school.

    The thing that confuses me the most, is why she didn't say no? maybe she was just unsure i guess
    Thanks for the advice too.

  4. #4
    whitedragon is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 15,299, Level: 79
    Level completed: 90%, Points required for next Level: 51
    Overall activity: 99.0%
    Achievements:
    Social10000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    1,032
    Points
    15,299
    Level
    79
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    675

    Default Re: HB8 said " I dont know" after I asked her out

    Because she is not saying 'no' to you in principle she is subliminally saying no to her having to cook you food or go out of her way. Go out one on one with your naked confidence. Don't bring a buddy, it will change the dynamic and show your insecurity. Ask her on a date with 100% confidence and an attractive offer and if she brings a friend, fine. You can impress her too and she will tell your target 'what a cool guy go for it' emphasizing your social proof. You can still Kino - touch her arm etc to let her know subconsciously it is a physical relationship she's playing for and encourage her to flirt back. Have great conversation, make her laugh and inspire her. Get her talking about her feelings or dreams so she is emotionally switched on and keep it fun. Ask her out for a 'quick bite to eat' so there's even less pressure or the possibility you are a busy guy. Ask her out now. Don't wait until the dance or some other guy might. In 3 weeks you can make her your girlfriend and bring her to the dance showing each other off. Be indianna jones and shoot the guys with swords.

  5. #5
    Sean Flaherty is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 94, Level: 1
    Level completed: 88%, Points required for next Level: 6
    Overall activity: 5.4%
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Maine
    Posts
    28
    Points
    94
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    10

    Default Re: HB8 said " I dont know" after I asked her out

    Alright thanks man, I'll ask her for a quick bite as soon as I see her.

    Great Forum, glad I'm here.

  6. #6
    Sean Flaherty is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 94, Level: 1
    Level completed: 88%, Points required for next Level: 6
    Overall activity: 5.4%
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Maine
    Posts
    28
    Points
    94
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    10

    Default Re: HB8 said " I dont know" after I asked her out

    uhhh I think I skipped the attraction phase

  7. #7
    chowcowmoo is offline PUA in Training
    Points: 144, Level: 2
    Level completed: 88%, Points required for next Level: 6
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    100 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Posts
    30
    Points
    144
    Level
    2
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    13

    Default Re: HB8 said " I dont know" after I asked her out

    What happened? No date? Fill us in bro

  8. #8
    Reds22 is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 87, Level: 1
    Level completed: 74%, Points required for next Level: 13
    Overall activity: 0%
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Location
    Toronto
    Posts
    20
    Points
    87
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    10

    Default Re: HB8 said " I dont know" after I asked her out

    I have to agree with what the others said. But in the future, if a girl starts to walk away from you (wether she responded positively to Kino or not) you shouldn't just grab her shoulders to turn her around to face you. As much as girls like it rough in the bedroom or on the dance floor, in causal conversation especially when your trying to ask her out don't force your dominance over her by man-handling her. Use your words and charisma to make her WANT to stop walking away from you and turn around.

  9. #9
    Dj Chill is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 1,330, Level: 20
    Level completed: 30%, Points required for next Level: 70
    Overall activity: 69.0%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered1000 Experience Points
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Location
    Great Lakes
    Posts
    169
    Points
    1,330
    Level
    20
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    66

    Default Re: HB8 said " I dont know" after I asked her out

    Sounds like you were a bit iffy when asking her out.

    Ive heard from girls complaining about how guys approach them to ask them out, or how they are shaky. It sort of creeps them out if you cant be confident about it and make it "comfortable" for them to go out with you.They definitely notice if your getting uneasy or creepy about it.

    Infact myself I was approaching a girl similarly like you were and i kept getting the cold shoulder or maybed. And I was just like yeah we should go out or do something and I didnt really have a def game plan.

    Well I got fed up and like played some mind games with her then had a full fledge date set up, we'll do this at this time on this day at this location....she says OK. What?!?! I was shocked how when I took a different approach I got a definite answer. Then I set up a follow up date in the works saying we should go to a movie such and such weekend. Ok we'll plan it when it gets closer she says. I was in front of my computer talking to her on the phone. not a text, and was like ok heres the movies, heres the times...whilst looking at them on my computer. Set that sh1t up and shes like "Oh i liked the way you set that up like that". She was excited and I was just like thinking to myself sh1t it makes it a difference when you have solid plans versus a "I dont know what do you want to do" attitude. Get it done, fail to prepare...prepare to fail

    So its more so having a definite plan and being serious and sticking to it versus saying "Oh we should hang out sometime". Got to make it more definite and happening, and keeping it simple like lunch or to grab a coffee at first, that way its not like your going 1. Closed date in a public scene in which you barely know her yet 2. possibly leading to some fishy situations there after......just have to sort of get in a girls mind to get what shes thinking at the time whilst your trying to ask her out. Think of it from her end. some guy approaches her, makes some forward comments, seemingly is acting like he wants into my pants.......Is that the perspective your putting off on her?

    Whats she risking with some stranger she barely knows? Are you going to try and take advantage of her or to pull some shady business? She doesnt know your intentions....you really got to lay down the foundation solid so she can trust you and know that you'll take care of her and that she can feel safe with you.

    I cant tell you how many times I seen guys ask some girl out too far ahead of time and 100% of the time they either said a NO or played it off as a "Ill be there if Im available" but then never showed up. Theyll just pretend like they are interested in going such as to not blow you off and turn you down openly, and make it more of a subtle hint they are passing your way.(which is cheap but what some girls do).

  10. #10
    Sean Flaherty is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 94, Level: 1
    Level completed: 88%, Points required for next Level: 6
    Overall activity: 5.4%
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Maine
    Posts
    28
    Points
    94
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    10

    Default Re: HB8 said " I dont know" after I asked her out

    Sorry was gone for a few days

    . Well, since there is some familirity she does kinda know me so..., I just asked her out high confidence im , kinoed immeadiatly she took it nicely, I mean she really liked my Kino my buddies were telling me after I asked her out they said she was blushing. She said yes to going out and dancing, I told her to foget the cooking, I told her lets just have some cofee a nice conversation, that way you can tell me all about you, she said yes as well.

    Couple day's later, I see her she says "I can't I have to study" I said "awww c'mone". She said "I really can't, I can't" I had to go so I told her I " Ok look, lets talk next time I see you" she said "Alright, well talk later, cya"

    Next day, I see her and I told her, " cancel what ever plans you have because were going out tonite" she said " I can't today" I said "Aww, why not today"? she said " My mom won't let me out" I told her " So 7 o'clock"? She said my " I can't my mom won't let me out"
    Jokinly I told her if she didn't wanna go I could just go ask someone else, jokinly she responded " Ok go ask some one else"(with a giant smile) I told her " Ok, Ill go ask some else, bye, with I gaint smile. I just walked away after

    Now, her freinds told me more about her family and she was fairly busy and she only has her mom, but she is a little strict, shes only like 19 so....idk, now she is mad at me? I treid saying hi in class and she kinda gave me the cold shoulder, I kinda left like saying "screw you" and I regret doing that I shoulda re-shceduled, I feel so bad.....should I apologize?

    I really screwed myself, she offered to go on a date but I messed up


Similar Threads

  1. Problem: She asked "How many FWB?"
    By Autismus in forum Online And Text Game
    Replies: 5
    Last Thread: 09-06-2012, 04:37 PM
  2. "Normal" vs "Abnormal" texting game
    By Saff Mcgraff in forum Online And Text Game
    Replies: 8
    Last Thread: 08-06-2012, 12:58 AM
  3. New Ballsy Opener - "Dont let your future walk away from you!"
    By sinister in forum Approaching, Running Sets & Building Attraction
    Replies: 8
    Last Thread: 07-14-2012, 03:00 AM
  4. Responses to "I dont have any time these days".
    By jstud in forum Approaching, Running Sets & Building Attraction
    Replies: 6
    Last Thread: 07-10-2011, 05:53 PM
  5. She asked me "What's up"
    By jdawg in forum Online And Text Game
    Replies: 2
    Last Thread: 04-11-2011, 11:47 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
DMCA.com