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  1. #1
    puauklifechange is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Where did i go wrong/ did i come off as needy

    So last night I went out to the club and ended up on the roof terrace where there was a female bartender working on a mini bar. I used a direct opener as ive found that these are alot more effective for speaking to girls over here in england. I'm a big fan of David X's cocky funny as that is a large part of my personality anyway and i enjoy speaking to women in this way. However i ended up being at the bar for most of the night now whilst i know the girl wanted me to be there and was enjoying the conversation i felt that i was coming of needy by keep returning and staying for long periods of time. She gave me her phone number and we have spoke a little but i dont expect her to talk back from now. What would have been the best way to deal with this situation? Any advice would be much appreciated

  2. #2
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    T-Mal is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Where did i go wrong/ did i come off as needy

    There's really not much to go by from this post... but my suspicion is that, you may have spent too much time trying to build rapport & didn't build the attraction first.

    What you could do is, wait a couple days or so... then text her something random, but funny.
    (You don't want to try engaging a full conversation, or get stuck in fluffy chit-chat.... that doesn't help with attraction).

    Think of it like you're just "textualizing" a thought, or a reaction to something that happened. (Or make something up... it doesn't matter)

    Example: "Ugh! There's absolutely NO way to look cool when you walk into a spiderweb... I hope nobody saw me! haha!"

    or

    "Hmmmm, coffee on my shirt... You'd think by now I would have learned how to drink from a cup! LOL!"

    These sort of texts aren't intrusive to her. They don't put her on the spot by having to answer a question.
    They don't even need a reply... but that's exactly why girls DO reply back to this style of messaging.

    There's no pressure on her.

    It's fun & light-hearted & gives her a chance to tease you about your mishap or just being clumsy. (AKA- "flirting")

    It's kinda like setting up a chess move... knowing that she's most likely going to respond in a certain manner, allows you to plan your next move/response ahead of time, & can flirt back.

    (This is how you lead the direction of your text convo.)


    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  3. #3
    Mannish is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Where did i go wrong/ did i come off as needy

    Hey bro!

    Well, at first there are no mistakes at all. You must consider that she was into a hired-gun job and that would complicate a little bit you job. Anyway you stood with your goal and that's awesome. Believe me when I say that most of the guys would leave her there after delivering the oppener. You Phone Closed her and called her, but don't expect a second date. Unfortunately most of puas are very good at getting HBs numbers but not that good at keeping the gaming rolling. You know why? Because it doesn't depend on them. Of course you want take it to the next level, but somehow it's something that doesn't depend only on you. That's when you start thinking: "Was my game good enough?/ Did I do what was needed to see her again?/Did I build enough rapport?".

    GAME ON!

  4. #4
    puauklifechange is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Where did i go wrong/ did i come off as needy

    Both great posts, i will give a random text in a few days to Field Test this theory it sounds very useful. And gaming is on the horizon again tonight!!


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