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Thread: On My Way to Destroying Approach Anxiety

  1. #1
    Sal_Paradise's Avatar
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    Default On My Way to Destroying Approach Anxiety

    So my old friend from elementary school was in town and we decided to go out this weekend with another friend of his.

    We got to a bar that was pretty crowded and stepped up to the bar to order some drinks. There was pretty much only big girls around us but I thought fark it and just started talking to them. I think this was perfect because it put me a great frame to start talking with random people. I didn't have an "agenda," I was just being social and talking to people.

    So we left that bar and headed to another one downtown. At this point it was just 2 of us. I spotted two girls talking at a table and we approached them together. We chatted for a bit then brought them over to play pool. The pool table was taken so we just grabbed another table and we all sat down (moved them after just a few min!).

    At this point I'm talking with "girl 1" and my bud is talking to "girl 2." I had a pretty good conversation going, completely natural; I wasn't super into her but was glad to practice. My buddy doesn't seem to be doing as well as me. After about 15 minutes girl 2 gets up to go somewhere. Girl 1 gets up to follow and I say, "Hey, before you leave give me your number." She says, "Our jackets are here we'll be right back." I'm like, ok.

    So they come back and talk for a second. We agree to go across the street to another bar together. They throw their jackets on and say they have to close out their tab but they'll be right back. After 10 minutes of waiting and checking around the bar, they are gone like the night!

    So my buddy is done for the night at this point and I decide to try my luck at solo sarging at a club down the street. I get into the club and realize it's an 18+ club with lots of cute college girls but even more horny dudes surrounding the dance floor. I see a young skinny chick with her whole midriff exposed walking and try to stop her. She brushes me off. But a second later I see her dancing alone, walk up and say dance with me. So she sticks her butt in my crotch and starts robotically moving it back and forth. At one point I try to move her body a bit and she just walks away. Would have loved to close on this chick but I had no idea how.

    I take various breaks and make small talk with different guys who are standing around. Looking at the dance floor I can see that at this place a girl couldn't dance by herself for more than 30 seconds without getting approached by a guy. I tried my luck a couple more more times with no success. One girl was like "Go away, just go away!" Lol, I felt kind of bad for them being hit on so much.

    I felt like since all the girls there were so young and inexperienced they just brushed guys off left and right even if they might have liked them. I don't plan on going back to places like this but do you guys have any tips for closing with girls in really "young" clubs?

    This forum has given me the confidence to do this so thanks to all! Any feedback appreciated!

  2. #2
    Fuser is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: On My Way to Destroying Approach Anxiety

    Good job man. Approach Anxiety is the worse. Once the fear is gone, you can actually focus enough to deliver the openers, negs, etc. It's like being a salesman dude, you just lose fear and you can implement the strategies and your numbers go up.

  3. #3
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    Sal_Paradise is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: On My Way to Destroying Approach Anxiety

    Thanks man. Being able to approach people I don't know in a fun, calm way has done wonders for my self esteem. And being social with everyone I happen to be around is so much fun that I can't believe most people will go their whole lives without experiencing it.

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    Default Re: On My Way to Destroying Approach Anxiety

    Yea for sure. Once you get the Mindset it is much fun. I approached 2 sets on my way to work today. LOL which reminds me I should get off these forums here.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: On My Way to Destroying Approach Anxiety

    Haha, nice! Before I just would have put my head down. Now I can't believe all the fun I was missing and how happy these girls are to talk! But yeah for sure, I need to get back to work too, this shit is addicting!!


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