Shantel: “Cody, you NEVER go out with us anymore.”
Me: “What do you want from me? I’ve had the semester from hell and it’s two weeks before finals.”
Shantel: *Death glare* “…”
Me: “Okay, fine, whatever.”
Me: “Why don’t you just bring Jake with you?”
Shantel: “He has to write a book report or something.”
Me: “I have to write paperSSSSS! Multiple!!! At least three!!!!!”
Shantel: “No, you need a break.”
Me: “Yeah, you’re right.”
So I agreed, and even though I wasn’t planning on gaming, the Mindset never leaves. My rules still applied:
1. Bring all the girls you expect to have fun with, with you.
2. Completely disregard the validation of anyone who isn’t in your immediate party (Don’t give a f*ck).
3. Don’t try to get laid, just have fun.
Fast forward ten hours or so from Shanny and I’s discussion to when we walk in the bar.
Brittney: “CODYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!! ”
Me: “Hey Girl.”
I love women who freak out when they see me. It sends my social proof through the roof. Everyone in the bar now knows I’m here, and I’m kind of a big deal.
I sit down next to Brittney, Ashley, and Shanny, my own personal entourage, my preselection, my social proof (small, but entirely functional). I say hi to Brittney’s boyfriend who I only kind of know and Shanny introduces me to his two friends (extensions of the group. Orbiters so-to-speak, because they’re with him and not the girls. I’m with the girls, and Brittney and her boyfriend aren’t much for PDA so if anything I look like I’m with Brittney).
Shantel: “That’s Ben…”
Me: “What’s up, Man.”
Shantel: “And that’s Chase.”
Me: “Chase? Badass.”
I sum the two up in a matter of seconds. Ben is socially awkward. Chase is a natural.
Shanny: “Do you want a drink?”
Shanny: “And what would you liiiike???”
Me: “It’s whatever—“
Shanny: “—Sierra Mist?”
Me: “No, Coke.”
We go and she buys us drinks. I’m scoping the place out though I don’t know why. Old habits die hard I guess. A quick sweep of the place and there’s really no one I care enough to approach. The dynamic is always interesting though. Who’s a chump, who’s high value, who really wants to get laid, etc.
We do small talk, the girls laugh at my jokes, my value rises, you know the drill. Shanny and I dance even though it is definitely not a bar that you dance at, but what do we care? We do what we want. Eventually we play a game of pool with Ben and Chase, then after failing miserably we all play another.
Then some guy approaches with a girl. He’s drunk and starts rambling about how he was just at a wedding and it’s his lucky night or some other sh*t I didn’t care enough to remember (Don’t get me wrong, my memory is impeccable but highly selective). He tries for Shanny and fails miserably, then decides that he’ll play the winner of our next match. I start amoging him not intentionally, it just comes naturally now.
Me: “I’m going to be honest with you. If by some odd miracle Shanny and I win you’re still going to play Ben and Chase. We suck.” Right as I finish saying this Shanny shoots at a ball with only one hand on the stick. You can imagine how well it went for her.
Then somehow I end up talking to the girl he was with. I don’t remember her name so we’ll call her…Alyssa (name courtesy of Autismus). Our small talk isn’t very important so I’ll just omit it, but it was only a minute or two (or probably less) before she got to the point:
Alyssa: “Is this your girlfriend?” *Indicating Shanny*
Me: “Oh, no. Shanny’s just my friend. She’s got a boyfriend though.”
Alyssa: “Oh really? Well where is he and why isn’t he here?”
Shanny: “He had to write a book report but he trusts me with Cody.”
Me: “Jake’s a cool guy. I helped Shanny pick him up. Shanny, tell her where you picked him up.”
Shanny: “Toys ‘R’ Us.” *:P*
Alyssa: “Oh my God, really?!? That’s so awesome!!!”
Shanny starts talking about how great he is.
Me: “It’s true. He really is a great guy. He’s who I hope to be in five years.” *Sidenote: I’m 21, Shanny is 22, and Jake is 26 (He took time off, worked at Toys “R” Us to save up some money, then came back for grad school.
Alyssa: “Wow, that’s really deep. I would have thought you two were together.”
Me: “Don’t get me wrong, Shanny is fantastic and everything I would look for in a girlfriend, but we aren’t physically attracted to each other and I don’t really do the whole ‘girlfriend’ thing.”
Alyssa: “I don’t either.”
She holds gaze. I stare at her for a few seconds, then I walk away.
Again, fast forward.
Shanny: “Are you gonna destroy that or let Chase do it?”
Me: “Destroy what?”
Shanny: “THAT.” *Indicates Alyssa and drunk guy*
Me: “I don’t destroy.”
Shanny: “But they aren’t even together. They just met at that wedding or whatever.”
Me: “Oh, really?”
Shanny: “Yeah, does that change your mind?”
Shanny: “Seriously, when was the last time that you got laid?”
Me: “It’s been a while.”
Shanny: “How long’s a while?”
Me: “I don’t know, a couple weeks. Maybe a month. I don’t care. Obviously it’s by choice.”
Shanny: “You’re a PUA, you’re supposed to be getting some.”
Me: “I just got a bj…*look at my watch*…five hours ago.”
Shanny: “HIGH FIVE.”
Chase joins in on the conversation.
Chase: “Yeah, I’m not going to do it.”
Me: “You’re not going to or you can’t?”
Chase: “(Defensively) Oh I could—“
Me: “—No, you’ve got me wrong. I’m not ripping on you, I’m saying if you need help and are morally okay with it that I’ll get you there.”
Chase: “You’ll help me…?”
Me: *That moment when you realize you’re left with no alternative* “I’m a pickup artist.”
Me: “Look, I don’t care if you believe me, I’m just saying if you need help I can do that.”
Chase: “If you could do it, why don’t you just do it for yourself?”
Me: “Because I’m not that kind of guy. I don’t do night game, I run day game.”
Shanny: “Why don’t you want her?”
Me: “Oh, I don’t know. Maybe the fact that I didn’t have to do anything. I could have pulled her in two minutes. I could pull her right now. Nothing that easy can be good.”
Shanny: “You think she’s an uggo.”
Me: “She’s alright.”
Shanny: “Rate. Chase?”
Chase: “She’s gorgeous.”
Shanny: “SIX?!?!? She’s at LEAST an eight, more like a nine.”
Me: “She’s a six. You’re an eight. Six to seven is the make-or-break. If she’s a six I walk away. If she’s a seven I approach.”
Shanny: “I’m an eight?!? ”
Me: “Shut up.”
Shanny: “She is really pretty…”
Me: “She is, but she’s drunk.”
Shanny: “You’re just making excuses.”
Me: “You’re right. I am.”
Shanny: “If you don’t do it this chump *points at drunk wedding dude* will.”
Me: “Better him than me.”
Now apparently Brittney and Ashley left without even telling Shanny until they had arrived at their new destination. They went to Jokers (which is an actual dance club), so I suggested we go there. Brittney’s boyfriend stayed behind, as did Ben, Chase, Alyssa, and Drunk Wedding Dude, to which we can only assume the last two had wonderful drunk sex.
Shanny and I are walking.
Shanny: “Why didn’t you do it? She wasn’t even that drunk. I’m more drunk than her. She was only tipsy. You used to love night game.”
Me: “I used to love a lot of things.”
Shanny: “It would have been fun.”
Me: “Would it? Would it have been? I don’t even remember her name. Actually, I never listened to her name. I can’t be that guy. I’m not him and I never was. I ran night game because I thought I had something to prove.”
Shanny: “Alright, alright. Sheesh, calm down.”
We get to Jokers and meet up with Brittney and Ashley outside, but Ashley is smoking and it’s cold. We go inside. They’ll be there in a minute.
Shanny: “Have you ever been here before?”
Shanny: :O “Then we have to take the elevator.”
Good call, because when the doors opened on the third floor and all I saw was strobe lights, black lights, laser lights, and every other light you can possibly imagine, and the only thing in my ears is 128 BPM, well, that sh*t was pretty epic. We head to the dance floor and get crazy. It’s not long before I see my buddy Brent who I used to dance with months/years back. So what do we do? We dance. And when we dance, people watch. And when people watch, girls watch. And when girls watch, they want our penises. And I could have realistically danced with half the girls in there (not all, my head’s not that big) but I didn’t. I danced with Shanny and borrowed Brent’s girl for a little bit, and that was all. Turned out Brent hadn’t been out in months either, but I guess that’s how that goes. Coincidences. Brittney and Ashley never showed up but we didn’t care. Come two am the club closes. Jake comes and picks Shanny’s drunk ass up.
Shanny: “By Cooody, I luuuuv you.”
Me: “Love you too, Shanny.”
And then I wrote this.
And this, to me, is game. The ability, not the action, to get the girl. The confidence to stand flawless in your frame. The inclination to put good friends before a lay. And the willingness to completely disregard social anxiety and instead do whatever the f*ck you want.