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Thread: Second Field Report

  1. #1
    Synyster is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Cool Second Field Report

    So over the weekend I went out with my buddy again to see if anything fun could happen. While some bad crap happened at the end of the night it wasn't a complete and total loss. Number closed a couple of girls and helped out another guy with his.

    Story goes, my friend DD'd for me last weekend so now it was my turn to do so for him. Its always been our pattern, alternating trips and such. We go to Hooters and have a fun time there, watching the game and thinking up ridiculous jobs that we could have and generally making the staff laugh so much they ignored the majority of their customers. An example from my friend;

    HootersGirl: "So what do you do for a living?" (in work mode, not really paying too much attention)
    Friend: "I work at the zoo. I help artificially inseminate the elephants during their ovulation area."

    He says this, totally deadpan like he was serious, then once she looked at him he cracked a smile and then she started laughing.

    OtherHG: "So what about you?" (Asking me and seemingly interested because of my friends response)
    Me: "I'm a fernologist. I can tell you all about yourself by feeling the small bumps on your head" (I say this and I'm able to keep a straight face so they ask me to demonstrate. I pick the cuter of the 2 and she comes over while I basically just give her a scalp massage.)

    Me: "Hmm, according to the different textures and divot pattern, you are a strong willed woman who loves her family, but you also enjoy slightly rotten mango's and are addicted to animal porn....I need to wash my hands now" (smile, lots of laughter from her co-workers and she punches me in the arm. I give her a one armed hug and thank her for not decking me and she smiles and goes back behind the bar.)

    Anyways, lots of Fluff talk between then and when we left since we let them get back to work. They kept coming over to check on us, alot more frequently than the other customers, and one went on break so I moved to sit beside her while my friend talked to his.

    Me: "So me and him are arguing over something. I need your help"
    Her: "Ok, what is it?"
    Me: "Would you ever have sex with a midget? He says he wouldn't because he's afraid of crushing them. I said I would just for the novelty of it. Where do you stand?"
    Her: "Well, if he was good looking then maybe...yea I would"
    Me: "I never said it was a he that you got to sleep with, yours will have to be female" (smile)
    Her: (gentle arm slap) "No! Well if I was drunk then yea."

    JACKPOT!

    After that we both number closed and headed out to the bar. It was pretty lame for the most of the night. Alot of bigger women out and while I have nothing against them, they're not my particular targets so I was out of the running for a little while. Went out to smoke and a 4 set walked by to sit on the tables in the small alcove of the bar. I ignored them since they were verging on sloppy drunk and vomiting isn't attractive to me. A dude about my age walks over and strikes up a conversation. I don't know what he said but eventually he starts to flounder because one of the women, the oldest in the group starts to call him out on something and the others all start joining in. Now normally I would let this slide but the annoying tone of their voices sent me into a weird mood. I look over and the older woman locks eyes with me. She's actually pretty attractive and I raise my glass to her. She spastically waves me over and asks me my name. I tell her and she loves my name, little fluff talk. I'm rocking in and out every time they say something I'm leaning out and just as I'm about to turn I see the guy start to walk away. I call him back to the group.

    Me: "Hey man, which of these girls is the naughty one? I think its her" (point to the quiet dark haired girl in the corner who's only half smiling)
    Group looks at her.
    Me: "See they think so too, but what about you?"
    Him: "Well since she was the first to jump on me and attack me, I'd say her" (points to the older woman)
    Her: "I didn't attack you, but you started to become boring."
    Me: "Whats your name man?"
    Him: (Says name)
    Me: "How can you think, (dude), is boring? Look at him! He's an awesome person I can tell"
    Them: "How can you tell that??" (all intrigued)
    Me: "Well first, he had the balls to approach all of you at once. Bet no one else has done that all night, they probably tried to talk to just one of you. Second, he has a leather jacket. You can always trust someone in a leather jacket" (points at self since I was wearing a leather jacket also) "And third, he actually picked the naughty one out of the group. She's" (point to the quiet girl) "the closet freak in the sheets but in public she's composed. You" (point to older woman) "are the naughty one in and outside the bedroom. Aren't you?"
    Them: (look around and bust up laughing cause I'm right)

    After that I isolated the shy girl and got her number then went back to check on the random dude.

    Me: (Lean in so only he can hear me) "Tell the cougar to give her your number and hand her your phone. You're welcome."

    I walk away before he can respond but he hands her his phone and she puts her number in there for him.

    The rest of the night was nothing interesting. Those were the only highlights. Oh well, gotta have a slow night every now and then right? Thanks for reading everyone, and if you have any tips or ideas, whether you think their good or not I'd like to hear them!!! Seriously, the only way for any of us to get better is to bounce ideas off of each other so have at it!!!
    -Syn
    "Women can fake orgasms, but men can fake love" - Bo Burnham

  2. #2
    Suave Kino's Avatar
    Suave Kino is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Second Field Report

    Nice work, Mr. Synyster. I appreciate your skills.

  3. #3
    Synyster is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Second Field Report

    Quote Originally Posted by Suave Kino View Post
    Nice work, Mr. Synyster. I appreciate your skills.
    Thank you Mr. Kino, I appreciate the kind words. Also your from my neck of the woods, though I used to be in Artesia, bout an 3 hours south from you. Shame I'm not there anymore! Lol
    "Women can fake orgasms, but men can fake love" - Bo Burnham

  4. #4
    Circa85 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Second Field Report

    Awesome report. Was really cool of you to help the oher guy out. i wonder what he was thinking when you left. Sounds like you got really good skills. Well done on the Hooters girl.

    Reports like these are very inspiring

    Keep it up

  5. #5
    I.M.Mortal's Avatar
    I.M.Mortal is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Second Field Report

    *Cheers*

    Solid game. Rapier wit. Thanks for sharing.

  6. #6
    bookofheelai is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Second Field Report

    Yeah nice job with Hooters girl..

    More impressive was you turning a little spark into some fireworks... wingman award goes to you! haha

  7. #7
    Synyster is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Second Field Report

    Thanks everybody for the kind words. Glad to see its appreciated, though I'm interested to hear if anyone would have done things differently or other crazy jobs to have that have worked well for you in the past.
    "Women can fake orgasms, but men can fake love" - Bo Burnham

  8. #8
    I.M.Mortal's Avatar
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    Default Re: Second Field Report

    Syn, personally I wouldn't have done anything different. It was your game and it sounded pretty tight. So you got full credit.

    The elephant insemination response was hilarious. That is the type of response I usually tell strippers. Like waitresses, they see so many customers they are scripted. It don't matter what you tell them, cause they won't remember, but you made it memorable.

    At a korean hostess bar my friend dragged me to, I had that nonchalant attitude because I wasn't impressed by the girls and I sure ain't paying 200 bucks an hour for a hostess to pour me drinks and cuddle up to me so I can fondle her.

    Her: "So what do you do in LA?"
    Me: "I'm an ass model."
    Her: "A what?"
    Me: "An ass model. You know, people pay to show my ass and they take pictures of it."
    Her: "Oooooh. You have nice ass?"
    Me: "Oh yea. Here."
    (I actually pulled my baggy pants down and showed her a half-moon. They all squealed. Of course, I would never recommend doing that at a restaurant lol.)

    What I am curious about is your field report with the hooters waitress. That's the next hurdle. You succeeded in the meeting location. Now you got to get her to the Comfort location.

  9. #9
    Synyster is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Second Field Report

    Quote Originally Posted by I.M.Mortal View Post
    Syn, personally I wouldn't have done anything different. It was your game and it sounded pretty tight. So you got full credit.

    The elephant insemination response was hilarious. That is the type of response I usually tell strippers. Like waitresses, they see so many customers they are scripted. It don't matter what you tell them, cause they won't remember, but you made it memorable.

    At a korean hostess bar my friend dragged me to, I had that nonchalant attitude because I wasn't impressed by the girls and I sure ain't paying 200 bucks an hour for a hostess to pour me drinks and cuddle up to me so I can fondle her.

    Her: "So what do you do in LA?"
    Me: "I'm an ass model."
    Her: "A what?"
    Me: "An ass model. You know, people pay to show my ass and they take pictures of it."
    Her: "Oooooh. You have nice ass?"
    Me: "Oh yea. Here."
    (I actually pulled my baggy pants down and showed her a half-moon. They all squealed. Of course, I would never recommend doing that at a restaurant lol.)

    What I am curious about is your field report with the hooters waitress. That's the next hurdle. You succeeded in the meeting location. Now you got to get her to the Comfort location.

    That was surprisingly easy since she texted me first. I should have saved the conversation, though all in all it was uneventful and rather boring to say the least. My wit was wasted on her as I had to explain a few of the things I said and she just ate it up....even though explaining a joke or sarcasm ruins the purpose of it lol. But yes she texted me while I was at the bar with my buddy. I ignored it for a couple of hours and when I did finally text her she was rather enthusiastic. After that and some chit-chat I invited her to a party the next day, something low-key and she could bring her friends so that she wouldn't feel pressured or like I was trying to Isolate her.

    So we go to the party, I have a couple of drinks and make my rounds with the crowd, chatting with a few friends I haven't seen in a while before opening up a couple of sets of girls and then ejecting. You know, for social proof. Then I made my way back to her where some dude with a faux hawk that had a white streak in it was talking to her. She looked bored so I walked up and put my arm over her shoulders while looking the faux hawk dude up and down. Then I dismissed him with an arm wave and "Take a walk Stripe."

    Now that last comment wouldn't be funny without context so let me explain. During the course of our texting she told me her favorite movie was Gremlins. No joke. So I saw an excuse to use a character reference to the bad guy and went for it. He stood there for a while, trying to talk to her but she basically cold-shouldered him and turned to face me. He eventually gave up and sulked in the corner.

    Now we're back in the same kind of comfort that I'd built at the bar, if not a little more so, and my arms around her, fingertips stroking her collar-bone slowly. Someone hands me a beer and I down it before stepping outside to smoke. She seems puzzled and follows after me, and she didn't bring her jacket so I kind of cocooned her up in mine. Ass pressed against me and I take the opportunity to bite the small exposed part of her neck. She shivers and I do it again. After I let her out of my jacket I get the 'take-me-right-here-and-now' eyes and I wink and we head off to my apartment.

    So all in all I think it was a solid close. No real spark from her though. Just didn't mesh well with each other and I explained that and she agreed, so we're amicable and not weird about it when I go to that particular Hooters. Cause that would just plain suck lol.
    "Women can fake orgasms, but men can fake love" - Bo Burnham


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