So this is my first post. The reason I have signed up is that I am currently travelling. Before I left, I broke up in a relationship with the girl I want to spend the rest of my life with (at the momento at least) however I need to have 6 more months to experience life on my own, hence why we Split. I want to use this time to regain a confidence with women I lost after spending teenage years addicted to cannibus.
Since I stopped at 18 I have made big strides in all áreas of my life and I would say I am a pretty confident person in general, a lot of people dont think I have problema with women. I know I can be attractive to women, but know a community can help to share experience of how to get over some of my limiting beleifs and give me knwoledge on how to move forward.
I have just finished The Game and have been listening to David DeAngleo for a number of years for my personal development ouside of women. However I am now ready to take this seriously. I want to do this with integrity and without lying, I know I have a lot to offer, but want to portray it.
So, my first real attempt was last Friday, in Ecuador where I am currently. I went out with a group of volutneers to the town to drink. There were 6 of us, 4 guys and 2 girls. One girl is a hard headed anarcist with half a shaved head, who is volunteering with another latin looking girl.
We were having a drink at a bar when they arrived. I instantly gave them a warm (but not creepy smile) but didnt give them loads of attention. After a few minutes I started conversation and started teasing the girl. As Im writing this I find it difficult to recall details – note to self: write report next day. Anyway, the girls went for a drink and came back and this girl sat next to me. We spoke for about 30 minutes, she responded well to my teasing, hitting me on the arms, laughing a lot and asking me my age (all IOIs I understand).
Then I asked her about what she was doing travelling and we got into a more serious topic. I was trying to complement he ron who she was on a deeper level but it seemed to move the conversation away from flirtatious into something maybe a bit heavy.
We left the bar and went to a club, or as good as it gets in Ecuador, cheesy music and locals circling us as foreigners. This is where I think I started to lose. I didnt feel like I had anything tos ay, and I stodd with the girls awkwardly dancing while the guys were outside. I went to and from both groups but wasnt feeling very sociable or imaginative. I wanted to dance with her, but didnt know how to approach on the dancefloor (something Ive always been afraid of – being rejected in this way and how keen to play).
It went on and although I knew she liked me, I didnt feel like the tensión was there. At some point I pointed at my cheek and say “un beso” (a kiss in spanish) and she said she didnt want to – didnt have a comeback at that point. I told her to teach me some latin moves, however we did it for a few seconds then she got distracted by someone else. I didnt speak to her much of the rest of the night, whenw e got dropped off at the taxi I said goodbye but didnt act too keen, however Im not sure if it would have been seen as shy or defeated.
I may potentially meet up with the volunteers tomorrow and I plan to be pretty laid back and not too keen on her to start with. Ive got til Friday when I leave to make something happen, and even if it doesnt then some feedback would be great for next time.
Overall I was happy with how I built attraction and know it could have gone somewhere, but I need to hone ym skills in moving it on. So, I have a few questions-
When is a good time to shift it into a lower, softer tone? Should I be alone with her? Is it only just before I want to attempt a kiss?
What do you do if you cant get a girl alone easily?
What do you do if music in a club is loud and how to look cool on the dancefloor?
What is a good way to move in to dance? Also with one friend with her which could iscolate her?
What do you do if you dont feel talkative?
How do you feel I did from what I said?
Thanks guys some feedback on my first post would mean alot. Also if teres any guys in South America who want to go out together let me know!