Rough Sex For the Rave Girl
10 30 I show up at dive bar (the disney land of bars. This place has a new act every week. Popular djs, dueling pianists and comedians. The front of the bar is scattered with expensive furniture. Many people sat here sucking down there chode juice trying to get drunk as quickly as humanly possible. The bar beyond that is run by essentric lunatics sprinting back and forth shooting silly string at customers, singing and stripping. But all this is eclipsed by a fucking huge fish tank above the bar with....wait for it.....a fucking mermaid.)
10 45am: I hit the dance floor and try to convince some girls I'm a god. They turn out to be christians and become begrudged at my claim.
11am: while I'm bouncing from set to set I get hungry so I pull a bag of almomds out of my pocket and snacking. Apparently gaming with a full mouth is not high percentage closing. So I begin to fuck with every human I come in contact with. I dropped some almonds down the front of this girls blouse while she's spouting nonsense. I sneak up behind some guy and stack 5 nuts on his top hat before he realized what I was doing.
11 15am: I'm on a role my state is through the roof. People keep bumping into me and my wing so we start playing a new game called bridge. Every time someone comes through the crowd me and my wing put our ands above our heads and try to peer pressure people into walking between us. This is fun for a while.
11 30am: me and an HB9 are making out. Apperentlynshe was promoting for another club and she found my antics cute. I do push/pull tactics physically and verbally. Then another promoter walks by and takes her. Doesn't matter I get uer number 2 days later in a parking lot.
11 45am: scare the fuck out of some HB7 blonde. She scurrys off to the bathroom
12am: me and my friend messing wit some small latinas they are laughing and the hb7 that I scared earlier gives me iois and I instantly grab her and make out wit her. I tell her I'm james bond. She doesn't believe me so I tell her I'm the easter bunny. Still doesn't believe me. I make out with her some more. She stops me and tells she just has to go tell her friends something I tell her that's fine. She comes back a second later with a small metrosexual looking dude. He leans in and says I don't know what u did but she likes u *thanks captain obvious* and I'm going to stay out of your way *u better*. He walks off.
12 30am: I pull the blonde out of the back door of the bar. Some bouncer tries to stop. I ignore his feable attempts and pull her into the alleyway. Some bumb stairs at us from behind the dumpster. HB tells me she won't fuck me here. I pick her up and start carrying her to my car. She yelps in surprise. She says her friends are inside and that she can't leave them I tell her we ll be right back.
12 45am: I'm on top of the girl in the passenger seat and all the sudden she bites the fuck out of my chest I shout in surprise. A large bruise about 2 inches wide is on my chest. I shout and she responds by pulling my hair. Ok I can play this game.
1 30am: At the end of the nite I fclosed her and I kid you not my car looked like a golden retriever had shed an entire coat in the passenger seat. Long strands of blonde hair coated my seats, floor board and all over the front side of my shirt. Wtf was this girl a chemo patient She left thanking me for the fun time never to talk to me again. God I love it when women use me.
5 pm the following day: my main girl looks at my front seat and instead opps to sit in the back.