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Thread: Field Report: Becoming the 20% Man

  1. #1
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    Default Field Report: Becoming the 20% Man

    For a while now, as with several books, I have been reading conquer your campus. I am now nearing the end of my book, and I wish I had done so sooner. The major lesson that I have just picked up in these past two days has now revolutionized how I look on social circles, parties, events, everything that involves human interaction. Putting this into effect, I quickly saw things go into full turbo, out of my control crazy.

    Here is my story in how I learned to become the 20% Man:

    It started Friday night, when I was touring around my hometown on my own, checking out various music venues that were going on that night. I tried inviting people along that I knew, and that I wanted to come along with me, but they all said they were busy with other plans. When I went to the downtown area, I met a bunch of my friends that I had not seen in forever.

    This is where the fun in the night starts.

    I immediately snap into this fun, playful mode that gets me rolling all night long. I flirt with my older friends, physical contact and the works, and then I left them. I just got up and left them, going over to another group of people I saw. Did the same thing with them, and then I got up and went to another group. After an hour, I observed something amazing: all of the groups I had been talking to started mingling with each other. I was now having fun with everyone, and a few of the girls started flirting with me. I even got out some fun stuff when I flirted with this survey girl, and I joked about how old some of the girls looked. The one where I said she was younger than her age kept flirting with me for the rest of that night, although I paid no attention to her.

    What really got me success was my bonding of the group that I spent the remainder of the night with. There was a good friend of mine who was sitting by himself, and right next to him was another girl that I knew in the same group. I creep up behind the two, throw my arms around both of their shoulders, and I go:

    "Come on bro, what's the deal that you got invited here and now you're not chatting with anybody? Let's get a conversation going here!"

    We ended up sharing our most embarrassing college party stories, along with a load of other things. When a new song came on, I told the girls that this was dancing music, and then they proceeded to start dancing. I yelled out to them "Hey, {guy} wants to dance with you". The girls get giddy, and then they run over and pull him up off of his seat, all the while he says "Oh thanks Swagman". At the end of the night, it ended up being me, him, and a group of people. We were debating about what to do, and when he threw out the winning idea I liked, I just said "Let's do it". He said "Swagman wants to do it, so I say that it's a must!" That ended up being one of the most awesome nights in a while.

    So today, I got a message from another friend to go to the movies with the same guy from the night before. At the same time I'm getting this message, I'm reading the part in Conquer Your Campus on becoming the 20% Man. In there, he talks about being the party, and being that guy who starts everything. He's the social pillar that everyone looks for, and appreciates as well.

    At that moment, I came to realize something. By sticking in my comfort zone for friends, I wasn't building any connections. All I was doing was reinforcing a bad habit of being anti-social. In order to kill this monster, I needed to break free and truly invite some new people into what I did. Only then could I network and become a part of the scene that I desperately wanted to be in.

    So with that, I began inviting all the people that I normally did not invite to the movies. I also brought up the thought of a bonfire in my texts. However, anyone who did respond did so to tell me that they could not go. After the movie ended, I get home thinking it's just my plan to go to bed. It ends up that my parents are angry because my youngest brother was getting word at all of the grad parties he went to that I was having a bonfire. All is good now, and I'm happy because the weather went south and the grad parties were going on. If I didn't have those two lucky occurrences, I suspect that I would have gone way over my head at the moment.

    As I'm typing this now, I understand everything that I did. On Friday night, I became that fun-loving, flirty guy that everyone wanted to be around. I was the guy that could unify the groups and really get them interacting on a fun basis. I became a leader, and the determinant factor in what the mood of the night was, and what anyone around me did that night. On Saturday, I finally realized the importance of creating connections and really going outside of your box to do things with people that you normally wouldn't do things with. I learned what it means to be that guy who gets the unique things going on, and to get people involved in them. Most importantly, I learned how quickly talks of a party can spread, and I will be careful about that next time I do that same stunt

    I hope this field report of my weekend and the lessons I have learned can serve you all well in the same way it has to myself.
    "There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time." - Malcolm X

  2. #2
    Wolf24's Avatar
    Wolf24 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Field Report: Becoming the 20% Man

    conquer your campus is a good read but it doesn't apply to all colleges in my opinion. Some colleges lack the "party" atmosphere so it takes more effort to be the party sometimes.

    But still, my props to you. Keep your spirits up and game on brotha!

    It's not about who I was or who I'm going to become.

    It's about who I am. Do it right here, right now.

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