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Thread: Day Game. Blanked out.

  1. #11
    Mystery_wannabe Guest

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    Girl A and B Update.

    Girl A
    The plan is working better than expected. I was running a bit late for class so I didn't get a chance to sit beside Girl A but this later on is actually an asset (more on this later). I built rapport on Decoys next to me hoping that they would help me out on the study group thing. We went into the session where we'd practice conversing with each other (it's a language course) and Girl A was hesitant to come to me (I sensed she wanted to, but just didn't have the right "excuse"). I stuck with my decoys until the prof said "change partners". Girl A looked straight at me and I was about to connect when the girl behind me tapped me fast. As I turned to look at her, I saw Girl A on the corner of my eye looking slightly bummed out but having to choose another random partner. I feel that this HB7 is probably interested in me as well so I used this opportunity to build rapport with her. Class ends and I saw Girl A getting ready to leave. I panicked (no! I'm supposed to do that study group thing again!) but remembering what gunsnglory had said, I continued talking to HB7 about getting together for a study group. To my suprise, Girl A didn't leave and actually came into the group. I immediately invited her in and tried to add the decoys to make this look a lot more engaging, but Decoys apparently have work so it may as well be just us 3. Before I can say "hey, why don't you give me your numbers so we can get together", Girl A initiated to get everyone's numbers! We're going to trade numbers tomorrow so everything will be set and done by then. This is going much better than I had expected. She's totally into me! Maybe this time I'll really hit the bulls eye although I want to hold off my thank yous until I actually seal the first kiss.

    Girl B
    Girl B probably noticed that I left the other day without her which created a weird atmosphere. I walked in and saw that she moved from her original spot (almost seeming to say "I don't want you to find me anymore"). However, front row was filled so I had to go 1 row back and bam! There she was! Next to her was an empty seat. As I approached the seat next to her, she didn't look up. I don't think a girl's sense are that bad. She purposely avoided eye contact with me (keeping her head down) and throughout the entire lecture didn't say a peep. I see other girls are interested in me and Girl B had loosened up slightly after (minor hair brushing, but barely any). Her legs are still crossed pointing in the opposing direction of me. I mirrored her action and crossed my legs on the opposite side to her. unfortunately, it's one of those lectures that are so dead that only the prof's voice could be heard. I tried talking to a guy that I know is in my tutorial to hopefully build some dhv, but it was hard to whisper. Ultimately, I saved it until the end of class before I talked to him. As I talked to him, Girl B gave me a quick stare (could it be she's hoping to fall out of class naturally??) and then left in the end (prolly didn't want to be awkward). She vanished quickly unlike the first time I saw her where she would walk fast, but eventually come to a halt for me to catch up to her.

    With all this tension, is there a way to loosen it up so that we can at least be friends and not look so weird when we see each other? She's locking me out, what can I do to open her up again?
    Last edited by Mystery_wannabe; 10-20-2009 at 01:08 PM.

  2. #12
    incognito Guest

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    I noticed you keep mentioning that Girl B has her legs crossed and pointing away from you. Did you notice if they were like this before you sat down or did she do that after you sat down? Big difference. If she was like that when you came in it may just be that "time of the month" for her. But if she does that after you sit down, you know she has an issue with you. She may be upset with you in her head for talking to one of the other women (I think jealousy can be good if you can turn it to your advantage).

    She sounds a little "high" maintenace to me but I wouldn't let that stop me if you are up to the challenge.

  3. #13
    Mystery_wannabe Guest

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    Quote Originally Posted by incognito View Post
    I noticed you keep mentioning that Girl B has her legs crossed and pointing away from you. Did you notice if they were like this before you sat down or did she do that after you sat down? Big difference. If she was like that when you came in it may just be that "time of the month" for her. But if she does that after you sit down, you know she has an issue with you. She may be upset with you in her head for talking to one of the other women (I think jealousy can be good if you can turn it to your advantage).

    She sounds a little "high" maintenace to me but I wouldn't let that stop me if you are up to the challenge.
    Ok, it seems like there's some confusion going on between Girl A and B being stated here. First, I want to clarify that Girl A and B exists in different classes. Therefore, Girl A is story 1 and Girl B is story 2.

    Now Girl B seems to have crossed her legs when I sat down. She doesn't have any competition at this point so I don't think she'll be angry about me being "taken away" but more like she's either "nervous, but kinda interested again", wanted to show me that "I'm out of her league" or she's upset that I've left her last time because she went to go ask TA a question and I left. But this is weird, I would've stood next to her like a dork waiting for her to ask the TA a question and that would communicate way too much attention. I'm sorta being sandwiched between the 2 ideals (being with her vs preserving value). At this point, I don't even know if I have a chance to patch things up. I find myself being most successful with Girl A and will probably put more effort into her out of the other 2 girls. I feel inferior to Girl B sometimes even though she's totally adorable because of the money issue. She seems like the type that would put a gigantic hole in my wallet that I can't afford. Right now I just want to be friends again with Girl B so that things won't be so awkward. But who knows? Who's to say that Girl A is a sure win? I can always use Girl B as a good back up in case something fails with Girl A you know what I mean?
    Last edited by Mystery_wannabe; 10-20-2009 at 03:02 PM.

  4. #14
    gunsnglory is offline Official PUA Forums Moderator
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    Congrats on girl A!

    With the other chick, just try to be friendly. If she blows you off, just ignore her for a bit, and then be friendly again. Could be she is dealing with some random crap, and doesn't want the complications. Could be she is just very nervous. At this point, you just have to be available to her until she opens up.

  5. #15
    Mystery_wannabe Guest

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    Quote Originally Posted by gunsnglory View Post
    Congrats on girl A!

    With the other chick, just try to be friendly. If she blows you off, just ignore her for a bit, and then be friendly again. Could be she is dealing with some random crap, and doesn't want the complications. Could be she is just very nervous. At this point, you just have to be available to her until she opens up.
    Thanks! I'll work hard for sure! I'm starting to like Girl A little bit more (still trying to control how much I'm committing to her emotionally).

    ---------------------------------------------------------------

    Update on Girl A:

    Alright PUA mates, let the texting game begin! I got her phone number today and I've started to show more obviously that I'm interested in her. I sat next to Decoy this morning for Japanese class (Girl A wasn't there yet). When she came in, she had this awkward look on her face (she didn't know if she should say hi or what to do) and I didn't want to let another chance slip away so I started talking to her and brought my bags and jackets over (the decoys noticed and looked a bit shocked). I guess moving over like that already communicates a lot of interest in her. She seemed to be kept at that hyped state (good sign) and we were able to make short bursts of conversation even throughout class. She also took out her phone to grab my number so we're all setup now. I can't wait to see how the game unfolds this Saturday when I meet up with them for the "study group" thing. More updates will follow as time progress.

    Ok, so I've never played the "texting/email" game. Where do I start? What are the basic rules that I can't go without?

    **Update**

    Girl A text me: This is a test! See you sat!

    What do I say? =S
    Last edited by Mystery_wannabe; 10-22-2009 at 08:22 PM.

  6. #16
    gunsnglory is offline Official PUA Forums Moderator
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    There are people who are much better at text game then me, but here are some pointers:

    Never say something in one text, when you can say it in two. This rule applies even when breaking up the text message could cause some ambiguity (Unless it is really, really going to piss her off if she mistakes it):
    For instance:
    Instead of "Hey, let's hang out. We can go get a drink." Break those two sentences apart and send the first, wait for a response, then send the second.

    Hand in hand with the previous rule, keep texts short, and try to ask open ended questions.

    Never text more than once, until you get a response to your previous text. (There are very few exceptions to this rule. If she doesn't respond for a long time, and you really need to convey the rest of the details of something to her, you can sometimes break the rule, but almost never, unless she hasn't responded in a 24 hour time period, do you text her more than once).

    Realize that you can get away with a heck of a lot more in a text than you can in real life. This is for two reasons: One, she will feel less threatened by a text. Two, if she takes it wrong, you can tell her that she needs to quit getting so up tight as it was obviously a joke (even if it wasn't). For this reason, you should make the texts very fun and flirty.

    Let me repeat that last part: Texts need to be light, fun, and flirty.

    Keep the texts based completely on your next meet up. (In other words, don't talk about future plans, other than your next get together).

    If she flakes on something, never act disappointed. (Unless, it becomes a habit of hers, then call her out for it.)

    If she starts to take you for granted, set up something, then text her to blow her off. Wait awhile, then attempt to set up another event. You want her to realize that you are a busy person, and you can't, and won't drop everything to be with her.

    Texting is a great time to casually drop things about your life. (Hint: it is easy and very effective to casually mention a fun time you had with some other unnamed woman in your life, the previous night).

    If she blows you off, just say, "That's okay, I'll invite someone else."

    If she takes too long to respond, when she does tell her, that you are busy and you'll catch up with her later.

    Get in the habit of sending leading texts. One way you can accomplish this, is to use an ellipse after much of your texts. For instance: "You're a fun person..." It implies that you meant more than you said. It also allows you to recover if they take something horribly wrong, because it implies that you didn't finish your thought.

    This one is a little controversial, but in my experience: Refrain from emoticons and 'lol'. Still joke around. If they take something wrong, you can jokingly give them a hard time for being so serious. If you use smiley faces and 'lol' after every potentially risky post, it makes you look insecure, and like you are seeking her approval.

    Remember that you ultimately want to get her to agree to go out with you as a purely social get together. As soon as you accomplish that, you want to try to get intimate as soon as possible. Most skilled pick-up artists, meet them, and then "change the plans" and get them to go home with them. That may be a little too aggressive for you, but you definitely want to ramp Kino up as quick as possible, when you get her out.

    Hopefully some of the text game masters will step up to the plate and add on to my list.

    I hate to endorse Paul Janka again, but his system is based completely around numbers, so he spends a lot of time talking about texting game. I would recommend reading some of his material on texting.

    One more thing:
    When I said, you can be more flirty with this girl, I meant it. However, you don't want to come off like you are zeroing in on her. You made a potentially bad play when you left the decoy for the other girl. What you should have done, is either casually waved her over, when she caught your eye, or made some sign language that you would catch up with her after class.
    Last edited by gunsnglory; 10-22-2009 at 11:38 PM.

  7. #17
    Mystery_wannabe Guest

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    Quote Originally Posted by gunsnglory View Post
    There are people who are much better at text game then me, but here are some pointers:

    Never say something in one text, when you can say it in two. This rule applies even when breaking up the text message could cause some ambiguity (Unless it is really, really going to piss her off if she mistakes it):
    For instance:
    Instead of "Hey, let's hang out. We can go get a drink." Break those two sentences apart and send the first, wait for a response, then send the second.

    Hand in hand with the previous rule, keep texts short, and try to ask open ended questions.

    Never text more than once, until you get a response to your previous text. (There are very few exceptions to this rule. If she doesn't respond for a long time, and you really need to convey the rest of the details of something to her, you can sometimes break the rule, but almost never, unless she hasn't responded in a 24 hour time period, do you text her more than once).

    Realize that you can get away with a heck of a lot more in a text than you can in real life. This is for two reasons: One, she will feel less threatened by a text. Two, if she takes it wrong, you can tell her that she needs to quit getting so up tight as it was obviously a joke (even if it wasn't). For this reason, you should make the texts very fun and flirty.

    Let me repeat that last part: Texts need to be light, fun, and flirty.

    Keep the texts based completely on your next meet up. (In other words, don't talk about future plans, other than your next get together).

    If she flakes on something, never act disappointed. (Unless, it becomes a habit of hers, then call her out for it.)

    If she starts to take you for granted, set up something, then text her to blow her off. Wait awhile, then attempt to set up another event. You want her to realize that you are a busy person, and you can't, and won't drop everything to be with her.

    Texting is a great time to casually drop things about your life. (Hint: it is easy and very effective to casually mention a fun time you had with some other unnamed woman in your life, the previous night).

    If she blows you off, just say, "That's okay, I'll invite someone else."

    If she takes too long to respond, when she does tell her, that you are busy and you'll catch up with her later.

    Get in the habit of sending leading texts. One way you can accomplish this, is to use an ellipse after much of your texts. For instance: "You're a fun person..." It implies that you meant more than you said. It also allows you to recover if they take something horribly wrong, because it implies that you didn't finish your thought.

    This one is a little controversial, but in my experience: Refrain from emoticons and 'lol'. Still joke around. If they take something wrong, you can jokingly give them a hard time for being so serious. If you use smiley faces and 'lol' after every potentially risky post, it makes you look insecure, and like you are seeking her approval.

    Remember that you ultimately want to get her to agree to go out with you as a purely social get together. As soon as you accomplish that, you want to try to get intimate as soon as possible. Most skilled pick-up artists, meet them, and then "change the plans" and get them to go home with them. That may be a little too aggressive for you, but you definitely want to ramp Kino up as quick as possible, when you get her out.

    Hopefully some of the text game masters will step up to the plate and add on to my list.

    I hate to endorse Paul Janka again, but his system is based completely around numbers, so he spends a lot of time talking about texting game. I would recommend reading some of his material on texting.

    One more thing:
    When I said, you can be more flirty with this girl, I meant it. However, you don't want to come off like you are zeroing in on her. You made a potentially bad play when you left the decoy for the other girl. What you should have done, is either casually waved her over, when she caught your eye, or made some sign language that you would catch up with her after class.
    hmm... In this case should I change tactics? I've kinda given it a bad start already so is it better if I sit back next to decoy next time or maybe even with someone else at another row? Or would it end up backfiring?

    The way our seating works is 3 chairs in 1 row. She sits in her own row while I sit 1 row behind her

    CM = Class mate
    D = Decoy

    [CM1] [CM2] [Girl A]

    [Me] [D1] [D1's friend]

    [D2] [CM3] [CM4]

    As you can see, it's difficult to "wave her over" when she's sitting so far away from me. I guess the only solution is to show sign language that we'll get together for a chat after perhaps?

    I've broken your rule about the "lol". I replied before I saw your message here and my response to her msg was "lol.. see you Saturday". Thanks for the tips. Those are REAL bad habits that I often commit.
    Last edited by Mystery_wannabe; 10-23-2009 at 12:03 AM.

  8. #18
    gunsnglory is offline Official PUA Forums Moderator
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    From your previous posts, it is obvious that she likes you. No one is perfect. You have made some mistakes, but it doesn't appear that they have been fatal. Don't withdraw. What you have done, has worked thus far, just be a little careful in the future. For instance, there is nothing wrong with sitting by her in the future, but never leave a girl for another in such a blatant manner. Also, I would be especially nice to the decoy next time, otherwise she might get pissed and cockblock you. No one wants to be used, so she might feel hurt.

  9. #19
    Mystery_wannabe Guest

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    Quote Originally Posted by gunsnglory View Post
    From your previous posts, it is obvious that she likes you. No one is perfect. You have made some mistakes, but it doesn't appear that they have been fatal. Don't withdraw. What you have done, has worked thus far, just be a little careful in the future. For instance, there is nothing wrong with sitting by her in the future, but never leave a girl for another in such a blatant manner. Also, I would be especially nice to the decoy next time, otherwise she might get pissed and cockblock you. No one wants to be used, so she might feel hurt.
    Hmm, I agree. I think that's exactly what happened cause I sense Decoy1 having a bit of intentions on her own as well. The reason I pulled the trigger a bit too quickly was because I thought I needed to show Girl A "attraction" a bit more obvious. I'm assuming it's not necessary now, but I don't want her to feel like I'm just baiting her around. If I continue to sit with Girl A in the future, won't that force Decoy1 into cockblock mode? The real big issue is if I shift my position from where I'm sitting (as shown above), I would be far away from Decoy 2 but I may also at the same time attempt to engage other people who sit 1 row infront of Girl A and I. I'm debating if I should throw myself into an uncomfortable zone or stick with what I've already built.

    I've also read up on ideas about first date and such but to be honest, where I live isn't like NYC where there are tons of parks and lovely things within my campus area. It's really just buildings with tons of classrooms so there aren't any "memorable" places that would represent me. I also have to emphasize that where I live, requires a car for sure (which I don't) as a means of transportation or we'd be walking 15 mins just to head down 1 block on the street. Any tips on how I can pull off dates without having to do major traveling? Multiple venues is a bit difficult without a car . I've taken a few ideas off my co-workers who said something in the lines of taking her to arcade places where I can do Kino Escalation without looking like a pervert but the major problem is not having a car.
    Last edited by Mystery_wannabe; 10-26-2009 at 01:00 AM.

  10. #20
    Mystery_wannabe Guest

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    Girl A update:

    If I was to describe it with 2 words, it would be "blown out". I met up with Girl A today during a seminar and she was still doing that hair flip and everything. "Great!" I said to myself. We talked for a bit and here's where things go wrong. I asked her if she wanted to do the Japan exchange program (this would be great for our developments) and she says "No. I don't have money to do it because my boyfriend would have to pay rent on his own and everything would be a mess." Damn it! She has a boyfriend!

    Nothing went wrong after except I started to feel threatened a little and became somewhat quiet. I still tried to carry on as much conversation as I can without being all bored and everything but.. there were times when she had to try and start a convo with me (I still need some more practice to get the hang of it). She's a very good talker and it turns out she's way older than I am (She doesn't look that way). So in my mind I thought "did I just get picked up instead?" I can't even tell.

    Correct me if I'm wrong, but my assumption right now is that I've been thrown on the friends list correct? Is it really game over? The problem is I don't feel competent enough right now to start stealing people's girlfriends when I've just entered the game, not to mention they live together and have WAY MORE life experience than I do. If the word "interesting" means anything, they seem to be the ones who have all set.

    I'm feeling a bit bummed out right, she's one real cutie and she talked about how there's so many guys that she dated and what she liked, what she didn't like. I made a few natural jokes and she seem to follow and laugh with me and really the conversation was great. I had a feeling things would've progressed even further had this "boyfriend" thing not appear.

    Any thoughts? Any comments guys? All are welcomed.
    Last edited by Mystery_wannabe; 10-24-2009 at 10:07 PM.


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