So I've been pretty much out of the game at this point. My last update in my mini-steps thread was March 19th and here's the reason why:
After going out with Zar, I was frightened by how needy girls could get. I didn't think that this could happen vice versa. With restrictions at home having my mother put her judgement on things and limiting me and the whole idea that I just love my luxurious life (nice clothes, cellphones, computers.etc) so much that I can't give it up.
I'd also run into the problem of not having enough time to spend with her. I find myself having a hard time striking a balance during the period of time we went out for. I lost so much sleep because either I was working, studying, body building or spending time with her, I had no time to relax and just be myself.
It didn't take long before I got drained out.
Recently, however, I started picking up on things again because even though I don't really desire a gf as I thought I did before as much, I wanted to improve my game. I didn't want to let things be just cause I won't have an outcome. I like knowing that if I wanted to have sex with a girl, I can.
I like the idea of power and choice. I want it in my hands.
What's really interesting is even though my game was off up now, Girl A wanted to re-initiate things with me today. We haven't seen each other for 2 weeks. We haven't call each other nor texted. Essentially what happened in the "end of the story" was I gave up. I ran away from it.
You might ask, how do you know she wanted you?
She waited for me. She didn't go to her usual friend who I couldn't communicate with. she knows that, she's seen this happen multiple times and she didn't go straight to her.
I actually stayed behind for a bit to talk to my professor after the exams and she stood there willing to bare some social awkwardness just to wait for me. I know it was weird for her cause she had this "uhm.. what should I do?" face. she looked like she was about to give up but placed her bag on the chair and waited.
A stronger hint was she held my arm twice while she talked about how she's excited meeting up her friends for lunch. I didn't react like I wanted her or anything, more like "just friends" kinda thing. I bumped her a few times and pushed her gently when she said she didn't have anymore exams (I still have 1 more to go).
A really strong hint at the end was she started telling me about going to Japan for studies a year from now including which university she's going to (even though she told me how her bf would get so mad).
She also said that she's working during the summer and will be available to hang out and to "give her a call". It sounded like "I'm going to be out of the presences of my boyfriend, come find me if you still want to get it on."
I didn't understand this. I thought I totally blew it. I didn't say anything to her no more, our conversation today was pretty much boring (I didn't do anything on purpose to try to be interesting), she did most of the talking as usual.
She totally pushed me off and rubbed it in my face back in December with that phone Call to her bf during our "meet up" which caused me to completely let go of her. Now she wants me back?
Guys what do you think of this situation? Is she some messed up psycho that I shouldn't come into contact again? Should I try things with her again? What's the deal here?
As I've said before, I've got no place for her to "hang out" at my home. The only potential viable place would be my car and if any sex is going to happen, I guess it'll have to do there since her bf lives with her. But, to me, this isn't making much sense.