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Thread: Marriage Minded, Looking for Ms Right vs Ms Right Now

  1. #1
    EMSaenz's Avatar
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    Default Marriage Minded, Looking for Ms Right vs Ms Right Now

    I am at the place where I started many years ago. The whole purpose for becoming a man that women would be attracted to and find desirable was to find a life long partner. I was looking for Ms Right, the illusive soulmate, my partner in crime, my clone, my wife. Although I never married, I've been in four LTR, two with Ms Right & two w/Ms Right Now.

    Who is Ms Right Now? She is a woman that you like and get along w/very well except your love for them isn't the same as it is for Ms Right.

    Who is Ms Right? She's the one that you feel you can't live w/out. She's the one that can't do anything wrong in your eyes. She the one that can put your yarbaughs in a clamp but doesn't, the one that finishes your sentences, the one you two give each other the same Xmas gift, the only one that can make you cry.

    I want someone to be a witness to my life, and I their's. I want to sit in front of a cozy fire and talk w/my soulmate about all the things we did and still want to do.

    I am focusing my efforts on just one woman at the moment. It's challenging because she's not completely unattached. We have a past, a wonderful past. It's a waiting game now.
    Carpe diem!

  2. #2
    Blistex is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Marriage Minded, Looking for Ms Right vs Ms Right Now

    Good luck to you, it is always a tough thing to do. I'm glad you have the courage, as I have a track record of running these girls off or just getting scared and walking away to the point I no longer date at the moment heh, it is a waste of my time and a distraction from the focus I'm putting on myself.

    What do you mean by "not completely unattatched?"
    KISS - Keep it Stupid Simple

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Marriage Minded, Looking for Ms Right vs Ms Right Now

    Quote Originally Posted by Blistex View Post

    Good luck to you...

    What do you mean by "not completely unattatched?"
    Thanks for wishing me luck.

    The woman is being courted by an ex from many years ago. He lives very far away and their relationship has been limited to phone calls. They made plans. He was leaving his hometown behind and they were going to start a life together - he flaked, never showed up, but promised that he would soon.

    Then I show up. She never expected me back into her life. She told me that this guy was coming for sure in June - he flaked again but told her he'd be here right after the 4th. In the interim, I got back into her heart and, now, she told me she is very confused.

    She stopped answering the guy's constant calls. She told me that she doesn't want to lose me and what we have and that she is growing angry at the situation and taking it out on the flake.

    If he does show up, he's expecting to move right in with her. Jobless, penniless, no viable skills, no resources except her. He does make lots of promises...other than that he's just a cheap player, needs a woman to support him. Probably has to move because everyone's on to him.
    Carpe diem!

  4. #4
    Blistex is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Marriage Minded, Looking for Ms Right vs Ms Right Now

    That is always the worst kind of situation, one of those "I can change him" type of things it seems. I started going through the same thing with a girl recently as well, but I don't really have the patience as I'm short on time as of late. I ended up pissing her off pretty good and I'm sure she won't talk to me for a good long time if ever again.

    It sucks so much being in that circle just waiting to see what happens. Have you thought about pulling away a bit? I have seen girls go for another guy because they thought I would be there if things didn't work out with the other guy, but I'm not really like that, now I have two girls chasing me (messaging me all the time, inviting me to come hang out, trying to hang off my when they see me at social events, etc) and I'm a total dick to them and I wish they would realize by now it is never going to happen.
    KISS - Keep it Stupid Simple

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Marriage Minded, Looking for Ms Right vs Ms Right Now

    Quote Originally Posted by Blistex View Post
    Have you thought about pulling away a bit?
    We're sexually involved, but I think it's time to make her pick. Pulling away will definitely help.

    The guy asked her to be faithful to him even though they aren't really together. She already betrayed him, but not really. His jealous nature is trying to control her already. She knows jealousy is not love, but destructive insecurity.
    Carpe diem!

  6. #6
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Marriage Minded, Looking for Ms Right vs Ms Right Now

    Woah man this must be a huge decision for you.but i think you are messed up with the wrong kind.never take tht from a woman until you are sure she is done with that.sure she is attracted to you but yh.starting finding another special girl since she is not settled.this would prevent you from getting needy or getting one itis.congratulations on your decision though.

  7. #7
    Blistex is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Marriage Minded, Looking for Ms Right vs Ms Right Now

    Pulling away is kind of a gambit I suppose, a big one. If you pull away it may make her realize she wants you, or make her realize she wants him. It rarely pays off for me, but I swore to always maintain walking power since my last relationship, and its being tested to the max right now, but I have maintained it thus far.
    KISS - Keep it Stupid Simple

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Marriage Minded, Looking for Ms Right vs Ms Right Now

    Indeed, the last thing I want to do is become needy or an AFC. Fortunately, experience has taught me well and I can keep my emotional involvement under control. Besides, I always have a plan B.

    Pulling back is a big risky Gambit, and I'm giving it great consideration. Today, she told me that she values our relationship very highly and that she knows she loves me. I didn't have the sand to ask her to dump the other guy so we could talk marriage.

    She knows I want to settle down and get married. She also knows my PUA past, but she knows the serious, committed side of me too.

    I just have to wait.
    Carpe diem!

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Marriage Minded, Looking for Ms Right vs Ms Right Now

    Good luck to you my friend! I don't particularly have the patience, if there is one thing that love has taught me its that you always have to be ready to walk away from it.

    I'm sure it will work out very well in the end.
    KISS - Keep it Stupid Simple

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Marriage Minded, Looking for Ms Right vs Ms Right Now

    Update!

    So far everything is working in my favor. I pulled back enough to give her some space and to dhv. The other guy flaked, as I anticipated. She took me out to dinner and her cell kept ringing. She said she didn't want to answer cus it was the other guy. I told her to answer and stressed that she knows I'm not the jealous type.

    She said the guy was making excuses about not coming to see her like he had promised and even told her he had been hospitalized. I said, "Poor guy, sounds like he needs a babysitter." After I said that I wished I hadn't, but the expression on her face told me that she realized the other guy is full of it. Then she said, "Yeah, I'm getting tired of his sh*t."

    I changed the subject, "the minestrone is better than usual, want to try it?"
    Carpe diem!


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