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Thread: "So, what do you have going for u besides your looks?" - failed. Why?

  1. #1
    Adam Taylor's Avatar
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    Default "So, what do you have going for u besides your looks?" - failed. Why?

    I went to a local ruined bar with my friends. Budapest is famous for these bars, so they are always full of foreigners. I started to talk with a french girl a bit after we get into the bar - walked opposite to each other, I say 'Hello', she responded, started talking. Everything went well. She said she was from France, I played the 'OMG, really? I used to have a big crush for a french girl in primary school. I csan't even talk to you'. The conversation went great, although she was there with her friends, she stucked with me, no intention to leave.

    I ran an ESP, make her turn around etc. - thought of closing, but before that, I tell her: "You are pretty, but this is commoin, so, what do you have going for u besides your look?" She get nervous and said something, that I didn't hear, and left. I tried to stop her (yeah, I shouldn't have, it was a sudden reaction), and tried to explained it to her, you know, in case she misunderstood me, but she didn't care and just left.

    So, have you ever been in this situation? I used this line for the second time, and I've thugh it's a great routine, so I'm a bit shocked about this failure. What was the problem? During the conversation, a neg her with telling that Hungarian girls said to be the most beautiful, didn't she feel insecure? - but she responded well to that. Should I leave this routine and never use again?

  2. #2
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    TheDuke is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: "So, what do you have going for u besides your looks?" - failed. Why?

    You're an aspiring PUA who uses the "looks are common" line, but this is common, what do have going for you besides your "looks are common" line?
    "It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything."

  3. #3
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    Adam Taylor is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: "So, what do you have going for u besides your looks?" - failed. Why?

    So you want me to qualify myself, as I require it from a girl? Sorry, I'm not sure I understand exactly what you wrote.

  4. #4
    TheDuke's Avatar
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    Default Re: "So, what do you have going for u besides your looks?" - failed. Why?

    My point is that this line in particular has become a favorite with PUAs and it has made its rounds on the internet. It's probably even been used a lot in places like Budapest.

    Anyways, there are other problems with this line, such as the fact that it can come across as an insult. Even if a woman is very secure, she won't stand for straight up insults, and a lot of women misinterpret this line as such. But even if they don't, at best this is still a cheap neg. In a lot of ways, I see negs as lowering your own self-worth, because they broadcast the signal that you need to lower the targets self-worth in order to be playing in the same field as her.

    Instead of negging women, try teasing them. Light banter and keeping things fun. It shows a lot more confidence when you meet a girl head on than when you try to lower her value.

    So in conclusion, yes, I think you should stop using that line.
    "It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything."

  5. #5
    Adam Taylor's Avatar
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    Default Re: "So, what do you have going for u besides your looks?" - failed. Why?

    Oh, I get it now. And I see your point, you are probably right. Thanks for the advice, I won't use this line. As you said, and everybody can see, I'm just an Aspiring PUA yet - I often work with canned lines and routines. I definitely have to work on it, and work on my game, too. I'm going to try to build my own style and my own game - maybe that's what I should have done to this French girl, too; not insisting on too-well-known lines but just be myself, cocky and funny. So thanks again, I learn from every sarging.

  6. #6
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: "So, what do you have going for u besides your looks?" - failed. Why?

    Adam this girl was attracted you. if she stuck with you instead of her friends that was a huge ioi.you didn't need to neg.That line may come off as calling a girl 'blonde' without brains sort of and it was bad.

    if you must leave to talk to others girl Number Close or bounce with her. suggest you go sit somewhere or LEAD.

    Either ways you nailed attraction phase to a point.knoe you will push it a bit next time.

  7. #7
    Adam Taylor's Avatar
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    Default Re: "So, what do you have going for u besides your looks?" - failed. Why?

    Thanks, I appreciate it. Feel great to read something like this - despite the fact I messed it up.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: "So, what do you have going for u besides your looks?" - failed. Why?

    Don't worry about getting to a point where you don't use canned material. WE ALL use canned material. Even the people who claim to be 100% natural use canned material. All of us have go to stories, things that we know have worked from experience, etc. The only difference is that once you become more experienced, you start making your own material. You start trusting your own experience.

    IMO the best way to learn is to develop your own material, test it, refine it, test it, refine it, test it, refine it.... That's the only way to get better.

    For me, I started getting a lot better at this when I found out one of my friends was also into and we started going out together a lot. We both have very different strengths and very different weaknesses, so we were able to feed off of each other. But it really started to get good when we started to recognize where we were in the pickup and amazingly enough, our pickups each night all seemed to go the exact same. This allowed us to realize what we needed to work on to get to the next stage, and we were able to develop really tight game up to whatever point we'd be working on that night.

    So try to develop your own material. It's the only way you'll get an understanding of what you're doing and what works. It will give you a much greater sense of self-awareness, which in turn will help you calibrate, which is the most important part of any pickup.
    "It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything."

  9. #9
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    Default Re: "So, what do you have going for u besides your looks?" - failed. Why?

    Over time I have found that a neg has hurt my game more than it has helped. I'm starting to realize, that if I am going to use a canned NEG, I need a canned quick recover if the NEG kills the momentum.

    You also have to gauge where you are at in regards to escalation. If the girl is already showing a number of signs of Kino, any NEG at this point is futile, your past the ice breaker point, it is now time to start the BOUNCE Isolation.

    I really killed it last summer with a girl I really wanted to get with. Like I mean I f@cking blew it, and all I needed to do at the time was set things to auto pilot and things would have progressed. But I opened my mouth 2 times two many, and BOOM, done. Over.

    So timing helps. Also, and I don't want to generalize, but often European, and South American women are a lot easier to get to know, less inhibitions, than North American women.

    It goes both ways though, European women will tell you to go and fark yourself, a lot sooner than a North American woman will.

    Just my experience.

    "Your best teacher is your last mistake". Lick your wounds, learn and move forward.

  10. #10
    HardRock is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: "So, what do you have going for u besides your looks?" - failed. Why?

    For now you may get out of your head and use the material till it becomes second nature to you.the only problem in this dynamic was the negging.

    Personally don't use canned lines somewhat.If you are just getting started its good to use it as a springboard later you may add yur own.

    Simple opener:
    "Hey did you go to x"
    She may say what then just go ahead and introduce yourself.

    tap her in the shoulder
    "My friend thinks ur cute"
    she says what introduce yourself

    lastly once you notice them
    walk ahead in less than 3 secs if you may and simply introduce yourself
    Something as simply as hey am .. and shaking their hand should work.

    Overall as said right about the negging.as you keep practicing you may get a hang of it quickly.
    Last edited by HardRock; 09-22-2013 at 03:10 AM. Reason: Additional Info trunc


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