HEY WASSUP MUTHAfarkAAAS!! I've haven't thrown any of these up in a while and i apologize for my negligence. So stop the wanking off, its story time.
9:30: I'm navigating the packed streets of Davis. The cops tried to close down Davis picnic day, but they couldn't contain the testosterone in the air. And it was electric. People were making out left and right. Girls dressed to the 9. Making me curious why i didn't see women this beautiful in every day life. Do they hibernate til they smell a party. My competition was bordering on pathetic, a sea of chodes as far as the eye can see.
8:45: I run into cybershot(the computer wiz/pimp). He has three women attached to him, like mollusks to the cliff.
They ask me for my name. I tell them I'm fucking god and I grab two of them and BOOM begin 3 way make out. I tell them i'm only 12 in the mind and tell them their committing statutory rape. They giggle.
Grab 2 asians throw them on friends. Mack town usa. Use asians to merge more girls into set. Create mega set by merging every group of girl that comes within arms reach. Use set to berate chodes near by. I eventually ditch set.
12: While we are waiting for one of my friends at chipolte I see a cute set of girls with a single dude. I absent mindedly start talking to them. The cutest girl in the group gets super turned on. Within five minutes my friends began rubbing my nipples from behind, I tell her i'm a closet homo. She doesnt believe me. I tell her my mommy soddomized me with a pencil. She doesnt believe me. I'm aggast that she would call me a liar.
I tell her to stand up she does. She comes close to me. But there is that ghey ass 3 foot tall fence between us. I look her in the eyes
Me: you know what, I don't think you have the balls to jump over this gate."
Her: Yes i do.
Me: Look its okay you don't have to prove anything. Honestly Nobody's ever jumped over the gate, what will your friends think of you, what will i think of you if you attempt to jump this hideous fence. So i advice you to stay within your comfort zone and on that side of the fence.
Her: Get out of my way.(She hops over the fence)
I make out with her as a reward and i pull her into the adjacent alleyway. I'm fingering her, while this creepy chode keeps trying to sneak a peek at us. I flip him off and disappear further into the maze of alleyways.
12:15 The sexy time is going down. Probably not in the hygienic place but non-the less is going down. Friends find us(mid-coitus), chodey male friend leading the way. They are ashamed over her sluttiness. They grab her and pull her away.
All in all, a good nite. I mean she did brake my favorite glasses during sexy time, butt fark it. I have a good story to tell when I'm old.