Brought this girl back home after a 3rd date. We didn't have sex. Why? Because I made a crucial mistake once we walked through the door that led to some other crucial mistakes:
I assumed we would have sex.
I always have sex with 3rd dates. I always have sex with women that come over. Not this time. This one left me blue in the balls. Here's the run-down. Learn from it.
We made plans for her to meet me at my house, so that we could bounce to our date. She meets me there, I let her in and show her around to build comfort with the home, and we bounce to our date.
The date goes well. We bounce back to my house to have some wine. She governs herself well. It's clear that alcohol leads her to do things she'd regret/I'd appreciate. Now here's the vital mistake that doomed the interaction for me: We had drinks in the kitchen. We should have had drinks in the bedroom.
We talk, and build comfort, and we escalate. It's clear that she wants it, but is trying to make a bf/gf situation happen through blue-balling. An age-old tactic. I back off and re-engage. She isn't going to that bedroom. She has her rules of conduct setup, and not being on her back with me knuckles deep in her only helps her uphold them.
Looking back, here's what should have happened:
- We come back, we go straight to the bedroom (I totally f***ked this up like a straight up rookie)
- I escalate
Instead, her's what actually happened:
- We come back, I let her filibuster, like "hey let's waste some time!"
- I escalate
- she blocks and goes home (because she's not on a bed/on her back)
I added a wrinkle because I thought I could. I shouldn't have done that, and now I'm writing this instead of doing the horizontal mambo.
Moral of this story: Don't assume anything. Just run your set.