Not sure I am posting this in the right forum, but 'Field Reports' was the closest match I could find.
I kicked out two girlfriends these last few days.
The first I have banged twice. She gave lots of resistance from the start. On our first date we just drove around for hours, she didn't want to go for a walk, she didn't want to come to my flat, she didn't want me to touch her, I got no kiss.
The second night I banged her, but she was giving resistance from the moment I picked her up, same thing no touching, no kisses, claimed she had the period etc. I even at one point told her that I was taking her home. We had almost reached her house when she wanted to come back home with me. In the end I managed to squeeze my c*** inside, and then she loved it.
Third night was slightly easier, but still extremely hard work.
Fourth night, I picked her up we bought some food (she doesn't drink), when we came inside I kissed her, but she resisted and wanted to eat first. During the meal she was rubbing her feet up against my legs. After we finished eating she again became defensive. So I went into the bedroom, laid down on the bed and told her to come and be nice to me. She kindoff poked me a bit with a finger said she doesn't know how to massage and in general kept a distance, so I turned my back towards her and ignored her. She then laid down at the bed, but not next to me, and when I tried to pull her over she refused. After a while she fell asleep. When she woke up a couple of hours later she seemed very sheepish. I was sitting in the sofa with my feet up, working on my laptop. She laid her head at my feet, but didn't come within reach, so I ignored her again. After a while she went back into the bedroom. A bit later I went in and offered to drive her home. We didn't talk all the way to her place. I dropped her off, said politely good night and that's the last I heard from her.
The other girl, is a similar story, but I have never f***** her. The cycle we go through is something like this: She tries to engage me, I try to ignore her. Over time I soften up. I take her out, she never gets close enough for some serious Kino. After a couple of weeks or more we start fighting. I ignore her or otherwise show passive-agressive behaviour. She tells me she will not play by my rules and she is a free person (I don't think she has others she just isn't happy about me telling her what to do). I tell her I agree and we both then agree to stay apart. Then the cycle starts over again. If she isn't able to pull me in with normal flirting she just upps the game and finds some other excuse to involve me like suddenly being sick, shivering with high fever. Of course then I soften and come to her res cue like a good little puppy dog. As soon as she is well enough for me to start hitting on her she keeps just enough distance again for me not to be able to break through.
So my question is: Since my reaction in every case is to ignore them and be passive-agressive when they don't behave as I want them to behave, does it mean that I am a Gamma? I must say I find it difficult to be non-reactive because they will just worsen their behaviour until I turn my back on them.
Does anyone have any good advice how I might change my behaviour?
Thanks for any input