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  1. #1
    Mike413 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Got a number last night

    Maybe not a big deal. I'm sure some of you guys get numbers all the time. I made sure it wasn't a fake. Anyway, here are the details.

    I went to a singles event last night. At some point I meet a woman who I find out lives in my town. So after talking to lots of other people I get back to her later on and ask if she wants to get together. At first she says she will give me her number. I don't fall for it. I explain that based on past experiences they never call. I say something like "well, I guess you aren't really interested then." So at this point she relents and gives me the number. I tell her I will text her and that was pretty much the end of it.

    So now I will probably send her a brief text today but I don't want to come across as needy. I know about the two day rule but she is probably expecting me to wait at least two days so she might be surprised to get a message from me today.

  2. #2
    alphabeta is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Got a number last night

    Hi Mike

    The Singles event was a great idea but if I may say so, I think you screwed it up a little bit, by saying:

    Something along the lines of 'based on past experience they never call'

    Which unecessarily made you come across as being needy, where no Woman wants to think of herself as being the last apple that you found laying on the ground, just so you can get yourself a date.

    After talking to her and building up a rapport, that was the time that you should have asked for her number, as doing it the way you did by having a talk to everyone else before coming back to her, you could have very easily given her the impression that no other girl is interested and She was your last chance.

    This next bit is not a 'Lecture from me' and should be taken in the Spirit of how it's intended.

    But when you talk to a Woman you need to make her feel 'Special' even the ones that you don't really fancy, as they can be good to practice on.

    Friendly eye contact with a nice smile and always listen intently to what She is saying (or at least give the impression of just doing so)

    All Women love to unburden themselves with their problems, which is why they love to confide in the guys that look after their hair, who could probably write a book about that Womens love life.

    Then having built up a rapport, where you are effortlessly talking about all sorts of Stuff, thats the time for you to get her number and then if you want, excuse yourself by saying you have to mingle, or everyone may start thinking that you are being rude.

    Though if She's really into you, Stay with her.

    Then 'Text' and ask her out and save any chat for the date, or you will have nothing to talk about when you meet her.

    Don't get into all the PUA stuff, just come across as Yourself, as a lot of those 'Pick up routines' are becoming outdated.
    The Power in a Relationship always goes to the one who cares the least

  3. #3
    Mike413 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Got a number last night

    I mentioned something like "based on past experiences they never call" because I was explaining to her why I prefer to get her number instead of giving mine. It is true. Almost every time I gave my number they never call or text(even when they say they would). I fell for it for a while but eventually learned not to. I agree it was maybe not the best thing to say. I could have just said "well, it's my preference to get your number first" and leave it at that.

    Some good advice here. I don't really remember most of those pua routines while I'm out talking to women usually anyway. Some stuff I remember but most of the chat I don't or at least am not able to rattle it off the top of my head. As many as I have memorized I never seem to be able to incorporate them usually because I'm not able to just pull them out of my brain
    automatically.

    So are you saying I should have gotten her number earlier on in the interaction?

  4. #4
    alphabeta is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Got a number last night

    Hi Mike

    In a word 'Yes'

    As soon as you've built up some 'rapport' and are talking to her in a very natural way and have found out what sort of stuff She's interested in, then thats as good a time as any to say something like 'Tell you what give me your number and I'll get in touch'

    Don't get into any long explanations, or saying stuff like 'Its my preference to get your number first' as it can imply a lack of trust or needyness on your part.

    Just be casual about it and accept the fact that 'If She Flakes, She Flakes'

    If you find out She like dancing, as much as you do then find out what sort of dancing She likes. (Clubs/Ballroom etc)

    Then Text her and ask her out, to a place that you have lined up to go to.

    Don't tell her where 'keep her guessing' and positively try and avoid getting into a lot of meaningless Texting.

    Keep any Chat for the date and avoid telling her your life story or about your lack of success or your success with Women.

    Keep away from those Subjects altogether.

    But I can see you are already making some very good progress, as the Singles Night thing was a really good idea, so don't let that be the only one you go to.

    The more you practice the better you get, as they say.
    The Power in a Relationship always goes to the one who cares the least

  5. #5
    Mike413 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Got a number last night

    Well for the first meeting I think I will meet her somewhere rather than pick her up. She doesn't know me that well and for me to go to her place she'd have to give me her address and it's unlikely she would feel comfortable with me doing that.

    When I was talking to her I tried to be funny and just keep things casual. The cocky funny thing might be over kill in this case so I will either keep it to a minimum or just not use it at all. I think with women you sometimes need to do what I call a disconnect(especiall y with hot women)but I think it's just as important if not more so that they know you are interested in them and not just out to waste her time or (god forbid)just out for sex.

  6. #6
    alphabeta is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Got a number last night

    Hi Mike

    That sounds good to me and unless you know what you're doing with the 'cocky funny Stuff' then I would stay away from that altogether and from my own personal point of view, I think its getting past its sell by date.

    But being 'Funny' can take the form of being amused by something She says (rather than what you say) then adding your own experience of something very similar, even if you have to make it up.

    Though it is absolutely essential in my book anyway to Show interest in her, otherwise as you say, She will think you are wasting her time and then move on in search of someone else.

    You could compliment her on her Hair or say 'Wow' I love that dress you're wearing, as Women can eat Compliments as fast as you can throw them and whenever I meet a Woman for the very first time, I make absolutely sure She knows I'm interested.

    You don't need to do it all the time but you certainly do the first time and then as you get to know her more begin to ration them out, in order that She does not take you for granted.

    So if you want to meet her somewhere, suggest you meet for a Coffee during the day and then if you take her dancing, She will feel fine if you call round to collect her.

    After the daytime Coffee or whatever you have planned, I wouldn't go and ask her to go dancing there and then, as that would put her on the Spot and make it very difficult for her to refuse.

    Instead She will probably 'Text' you to thank you for the Coffee and will say how nice it was meeting you.

    Then you can Text to ask her out on another date (dancing or a meal out or whatever) and while hopefully She will say Yes, it will give her the chance to make an excuse, if She doesn't want to see you again.

    In which case don't let it knock you back, keep going and ask someone else.

    But if you do get lucky.

    Then as soon as you clap eyes on her, go 'Wow' you look amazing! or something like that and give her a great big smile, or you could even take along a Single Rose, as Women really love all that stuff and think its really Romantic, being something that most guys don't do.

    Not too sure about the disconnecting thing you mentioned, as the idea is to connect with her and then build a rapport, so that conversation, flows like double cream, as you suddenly find that you both have a mutual interest you can talk about.

    But I can see your on the right track now, with the Singles Club thing and so its only a matter of time before you achieve success.
    The Power in a Relationship always goes to the one who cares the least

  7. #7
    Mike413 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Got a number last night

    cocky and funny in the form of a neg can be powerful if used on beautiful women. However, doing that probably won't change her mind about you too much. It could make her like you a little bit more but if she already has it in her head you are not her type there's not much you can do no matter what all the gurus say. Most of those women will wind up lonely and miserable anyway or just go from shallow relationship to shallow relationship and never find true happiness anyway.

  8. #8
    Mike413 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Got a number last night

    Update:

    I sent this woman a text sometime yesterday in the early evening. I have not heard back from her and to be honest don't expect to. It's all good. Her loss.

  9. #9
    Mike413 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Got a number last night

    Update:

    I accidentally dialed her number around 12:30 am. It was going to go to voicemail but then I hung up and didn't leave a message. I admittedly messed up here so I deleted her as a contact and blocked her. Oh well. Time to move on.

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Got a number last night

    The ONLY rule for texting a girl when she gives you her number is "DON'T SCREW IT UP BY SENDING LAME TEXTS".

    I always text the girl right away, and flirt with her through recall humor / nicknames / teasing/bantering.

    If you wait a couple days, you give every other guy who might have her number that many days head start on gaming her.


    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.


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