This is a tale of two stories
Story of girl one: I'm not going through the small details for how I picked this girl up, but it was a sucessful pick up at the library after a cold approach from asking how to delete a fb post by my friend, how to fix her head phones, and how school is stressful/ sucks. Not to mention she was an easy 9 and had my name (which is funny).
Anyways there were two sucessful lunch dates with this girl and everytime I talked to her, it was like she had something going every minute of the day... which was upsetting because I could never get a dinner date with her. The lunch dates themselves I would rate 9's out of 10's, with no akward silences what so ever ... with interesting sh1t to say other than my day was. We talked about corky stuff like, what would you do if you had 9 lives or if you had a day to spend a billion dollars what would you spend it on. We also talked about what we did and stuff but that was mostly the first lunch and some on the second. She gave me ioi's a couple of times, but for me it was kind of weird to do Kino only because I saw her as seeing me as " some complete stranger she just met at the library." The Kino never happened and the third date never happened because I pushed for dinner too hard when she said she could do lunch, and then it all fell apart.
Part two ... the other fail: So I met this girl at this halloween party two days ago and we hit it off really well. For me it was more natural to do the kino crap like the arm around the shoulder, hand holding, what have you ... anyways I got a sh1t load of IOI's and we ended walking together in the cold 5 miles back to our neighborhood. I probably could have held her for the walk, held her hand, I don't farking know... but probably more. Though at the end I gave her a hug, exchanged numbers and she invited me to this party the day after.. I said I would go and thus ends the night.
The second party was fun and I saw her there, but it was wierd how things played out. At first it seemed like she was trying not to notice me, but then she caved in and said hi ... when we talked she seemed to be super happy, but when somebody came by to talk to us she just walked away. When I did talk to her more she gave the same reaction except it seemed like she wasn't interested with what I was saying, she looked like she was expecting me to do something then when she didn't get it, she walked away. Maybe she wanted me to give her a big old smooch or something, but then again I have terrible anxiety when it comes to these things. Obviously that didn't happen.
Anyways, I just want to try to see where I went wrong and I believe both stories share insight. With the first chick, I had no Kino and I might have seemed needy ... however I'm going to make a guess that if I had played my cards right, I should have gotten dinner anyways. If I had played the Kino off in that situation, she might have wanted to continue things further past. With the second girl, I'm straight up certain that it was a problem with romantic kino. I believe that talking gets you only 60 percent of the way there, but the other 40 percent is physical ... which I lack. At some point you can talk all you want, but it doesn't get you any further and thats where I drown in anxiety.
What is your input, would you agree that I failed for those various reasons? Is there any other reason for why the sucess of my pseudo dates have no correlation for where things go? I can't believe I'm going to ask this but when do you know it is appropriate for K-close and how does one go about it?