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View Poll Results: Whats the best way to meet her in a different context? (no expectations)

Voters
3. You Need To Login To Vote On This Poll
  • ask for her number after explaining what the deal is

    0 0%
  • giving her my number and tell her to call me then

    0 0%
  • try to set up a date

    1 33.33%
  • get her attracted and try to set it up/get her number at the end

    2 66.67%
Multiple Choice Poll.
Results 1 to 3 of 3
  1. #1
    lastpioneer is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Attracted to my therapist (my age), how to proceed?

    I've seen a therapist for three sessions. I need to end the sessions but I also want to meet up with her in a different context, how best do I set this up? should I do a pattern before I tell her what the deal is with my attraction and how the therapy won't work?

    I had some personal and law school issues and the counseling center can be helpful. I was attracted to her from the beginning, she is an HB9. Also I can tell some personality traits; not necessarily by what she's saying but how she is acting. For example, articulateness, social intelligence, nice smile.

    She's a doctoral student, around my age at the same university. This is definitely a natural attraction (not some psychological relationship). The sessions are frustrating and I must end the therapy for practical reasons. It's hard to be candid when the dynamic is one of a girl I'm potentially interested in and not effective therapy.

    It isn't unethical yet for she and I to meet up, how do I best bring this up? I'm not implying she is "the girl for me"; but i'd like to maybe grab coffee with her or play tennis. She played in college and I'm a good player. She knows vulnerable things about me so I'm not expecting anything but wanted to give it a shot. Do I just say soemthing like: i'm attracted to you, something i can't control, you're prob. gonna try and convince me it's some psychoanalytic stuff, i'd rather we forgot these sessions and played tennis sometimes, here's my number, if I don't hear from you I won't really think about it, you're good at your job and have a bright future. or should i try to set up a date at the session?

    Should I try to create attraction before I tell her all this or rather tell a story or something?

  2. #2
    lastpioneer is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Attracted to my therapist (my age), how to proceed?

    thoughts anyone? this is a unique situation to explain so pardon me if this post was kinda long

  3. #3
    prescriptions is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Attracted to my therapist (my age), how to proceed?

    I think you should avoid getting personal with her like that...first of all because it is a professional setting, and secondly because by displaying to her all your weaknesses for counseling, you already put yourself in a position of weakness.

    If you want to just "try" for the sake of trying, be straight & honest & tell her your attracted to her and that because of that you need to find another counselor because its affecting your sessions. Then tell her you want to take her out, and that you'll give her your info, then make sure to take hers.

    Tell her you'll call her later and that if she decides not to answer you won't take it personal or make an issue about it. If you see her in the future, the last thing you want is to be awkward so let her know ahead of time, it won't be. If you do continue to see her outside the professional setting, be a friendly dude and at least say hi. Only outside the professional should you try to build attraction.

    W/e you do, don't stalk her.


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