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  1. #1
    slamurai is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Is she still interested? Screwed up the last 5 mins of an amazing date.

    I'm looking for some damage control advice please.

    So my 4 year relationship ended about month and half ago and I wanted to get back out there and pick up chicks again. One of my Best friends GF's said "omg you should meet my hot Russian friend Jenny". It was a little early for me since I was still getting over my relationship but I thought it wouldn't hurt to get laid.

    So Jenny and I exchanged our photos over text through her friend and we were both still interested and I got her phone number after that. So a group get together at a local lounge was arranged for us to meet and get to know each other a little bit. Before meeeting for the first time at this lounge, I ended up calling her that week to just chat a little bit before our first meeting. It went extremely well and we talked a bit more than I expected since we ended up having alot in common and knowing a few of the same people through aquintances.

    So Saturday night came and we gathered at the lounge with friends to have some drinks. Before this night I knew she had to leave the lounge early to go to her best friends birthday party that night. When she told me this I texted her "Its cool if you have to leave early, if I find you intersting enough we will meet again". She responded "Okay "

    So she was suppose to stay at this lounge for about an hour until she had to go. We hit off really well and the conversation went great. She actually left 1 hour later than she was suppose to. When she left I got a text from her saying "It was nice to meet you " and I responded "you too ".

    I called her 3 days later on tuesday night to chat and ask her to see me again.
    The plan was to see a DJ show together (Dash Berlin) who was playing on Thursday night right across the street from my place. From our conversations we established that we both love the same music and like going to DJ shows.

    So in our conversation I asked her if she would like to go out and party with me on Thursday. I told her I would pick her up and head over to a lounge, have a bite and a few drinks before heading over to the show. She asked who we were going with and I said just you and I and she was super excited.

    Thursday night came and went to my favourite lounge, had a few drinks and some appetizers. The conversation went well. One comment she made at the lounge that I should of considered more was "I find that most Canadian women are sluts"....... I was thinking, this is coming from a Russian?

    During that time I established that we would stop by my place so I could change and grab the tickets. We dropped off my car at my place, had a couple drinks and listened to a few songs we talked about. We headed to the show across the street just before midnight before the show started.

    The show was excellent and went really well. The girl is a ballroom dancer/model and definately knew how to move her ass so we had alot of fun on the dance floor. Through out the night the dancing got dirtier between us and more intimate which lead to making out a couple times. The first time I went for the kiss she pulled away smiling and rejected me O.o. I kinda laughed it off and continued grinding with her. 30 mins later I was going to try again but a bit more subtle. She saw this and kissed me instead and we ended up making out a few times. At this time I was confident that I was taking her back to my place.

    The show ended and we were both talking about how great of a time we had and she said "its so weird I feel like I know you a lot better than just meeting twice."
    We were walking back towards my apaprtment when 3/4 of the way there she said I should call a cab and get home. I was shocked, stunned and did not plan for this. I did not have a plan B.

    I think my reaction was definately unattractive and needy. I tried to convince her to come back with me and I would drive her home in the morning since she lives so far and we didn't have to have sex. Her excuse was that she's only met me twice. She went on to make the decision to go home. You could tell in my expressions that I was dissapointed and pissed off.

    I went home and reviewed the whole night to see where I went wrong and was pissed off in regards to my reaction to her not going home with me.

    In the morning at 8:30 when I was going to work I texted her "Good morning Jenny, I just wanted to let you know that I had a great time with you last night".
    3 hours later at noon she responded "Good morning! yea, Me too!". I made a small comment about it being the afternoon now and she never responded. I felt like she was short with me.

    So I called her on Saturday about 6 pm with no answer but received a text back from her almost immediately saying "Hey I'm at work, I'll talk to you later". I responded "ok". It is now Monday and I have not heard from her.

    Some facts I think maybe a bit relavent.

    Her

    -22 years old
    -Russian that grew up in Ukraine
    -She's been in Canada less than 2 years
    -Always takes a long time to text or call me back.
    -Never initiated contact on phone except when she called me Wednesday Night confirming that she is getting off work early so we can get together at a decent time.

    Me

    -28 Years old
    -Polish that grew up in Canada (moved here when I was 8). I believe this was one of the reason we had alot in common. Both Eastern European.
    -My intention for this date was solely to get laid.
    - My plan was. Lounge, my place temporarily, DJ Show(dancing) and then back to my place to get laid.

    Now I'm actually interested in this girl because I feel like she played me and not the other way around. I'm also interested because she has value and self respect. Its also driving me nuts not knowing if I completely screwed this up for myself.

    usually I would just move on but not this time. I will try to get another date with her and see if she turns me down. If she does I will move on.

    I'm looking for peoples opinion on all this and wondering if I can still salvage this.
    How to do the damage control on this? Is it possible? How?

    My thoughts

    I should of known and altered my plan after a few signs that she would not sleep with me that night

    1) At the lounge her comment on how Canadian girls are sluts
    2) Playing hard to get and rejecting my first kiss attempt.
    3) Telling me that shes not going back to my place because we only met twice so far.

    If you took the time to read this vomit, then I really appreciate it and would love to here peoples opinion on this one.

    Please feel free to ask for any more information if you see neccessary.

    My plan.

    -This is the second day since she responded by text "I'm at work, I'll talk to you later". Haven't heard from her since.
    -I'm going to call her tonight again to see if she will blow me off.
    -If I talk to her and she's being stand offish, I plan to confront her and ask if she's upset about me trying to take her home.


    Thank you for your incite in advance

  2. #2
    Konnect Life is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Is she still interested? Screwed up the last 5 mins of an amazing date.

    I'm no expert at this, but one thing I am (now) an expert at is knowing when and where I screw up and knowing when I'm doing it (and nothing hurts more than doing something wrong and knowing you're doing something wrong but still having the desire to continue to do it anyway then realizing it's too late to abort).

    In this case, you screwed up mostly when you didn't just let her take the cab home and act like you don't care. I'm good at hiding my emotions and I would've just given her a passionate kiss or whatever goodbye and not made a big deal about it then did whatever I had to do to take care of myself once I got inside, knowing that I probably had big chances of seeing her again since I "let her go without expectations" the first time. But then again, I'm not sure if what I'm saying is the right thing to do or not. I'm sure you'll get a bunch of different answers and solutions to your question.

    I would've just been happy with making it as far as getting her to my place one time AND THEN going back out again AND getting a make-out dance in there as well.

    But then again, you did say your goal was primarily to get laid, so I can see how these turn of events would've been disappointing to you.

  3. #3
    Konnect Life is offline PUA in Training
    Points: 287, Level: 5
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    Default Re: Is she still interested? Screwed up the last 5 mins of an amazing date.

    I gotta say that even with all the improvements I've made over time, you're still doing better than me because I don't even know how to text properly without reviewing notes/cheat sheets, or even more, how to get to the level of exchanging photos.... yet you're out there texting, getting in and out of ACTUAL RELATIONSHIPS with girls and making it 75-85% of the way to getting laid with a new one.

    Whether or not she's (still) interested, you know you're doing SOMETHING right because look at how much you've managed to do! Next time you go out with someone, if it goes very similar to this date, all you have to do is eliminate the one main thing you did wrong (which was geting upset over her not wanting to come over) and you should be ok. But then again, if you take my advice and the next girl rejects you for letting her go too easily instead of being persistent with her, I don't know what to tell you.


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