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  1. #1
    xcalibar is offline PUA in Training
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    Question She left me for her x, but changed her mind.

    Hi all,

    I am new to this forum and hope I can prove to be an assistance to others. I am going to keep my story as short as possible.

    I met a girl 3 months ago who had a boyfriend, she i part of my "girl group" now around 3 weeks ago she broke up with her boyfriend. 5 days after we had out first date. Things went pretty well and pretty fast (rebound) she said how much she really liked me but asked to go slow as possible as she had just gotten out of a relationship. I understood and we tried to go slowly.

    Last sunday morning after sleeping at my house, she woke up and she told me that she could do this anymore as she was still thinking about her boyfriend and could not be with me in this way. Later on in the day the other girls tell me she wants to get back with her X.

    The day before yesterday I found out from her friends that she decided not to get back And that she still thinks we really clicked and really likes me but is scared to speak to me because of rejection.

    Moving on, I organised a picnic for 40 people this saturday on the beach. I invited her on the event on Facebook (she was shocked). I heard from her friends she was scared of coming to it because she thought i might be cold. (please note her entire group will be there). She posted on the wall that she has lots of work and could not make it ( BS). Should i contact her in a friendly manner and tell her to stop being such a nerd, keep the conversation brief and leave or should i just continue not keeping in contact with her. we haven't spoke since what happened.

    SORRY FOR THE LONG POST. And thanks for the help. :

    Please note i had got with this girl at the begging by not playing and games with her as i normally would she was very honest at all times regardless how much it would affect our relationship.

  2. #2
    AstroBoy is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: She left me for her x, but changed her mind.

    Dude be straight with her, contact her.
    Be cool as fuck, be awesome and neg her a little, this is normal.

    Ever woken up drunk and regretted stuff? It's the same idea but women are just emotionally more challenged!
    This is like so tiny, don't even phase shift this one, carry on regardless and talk to her.

    Although do keep it brief, cocky / funny, playful and a little neg and you should be able to tease her out of her shell (pun intended)

    Keep us posted man

    ~Astro
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  3. #3
    thisisSPARTAAAA's Avatar
    thisisSPARTAAAA is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: She left me for her x, but changed her mind.

    Astroboy is right. This one is easy to lock down. You already know she likes you and is afraid you will be cold to her. Call her and give her an intimate personal invite. That's if you think she's worth it. For me, though, that is BS. I would never take a girl back who left me for her ex, or anyone else. Just because that's insulting to me that she thinks she can pick me up and throw me aside whenever she wanted.

  4. #4
    xcalibar is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: She left me for her x, but changed her mind.

    Hey,

    Thanks for your replies,

    I spoke to her on Facebook as she was online as this is how the chat went,, i didn't use any thing because i was quite shocked how cold she was being:

    me: Hey (name), Stop being such a nerd and come to the picnic!
    her: Hi (name). Really I wanted to come but I have to work overtime today and tomorrow so I'll be too tired to work and I would have come for an hour but it's too far away to just come for an hour.
    me: no worries
    me:I understand
    me:: come on smile it suits you.
    her:Hehe thanks (NAME)

    and then she went offline soon after

  5. #5
    xcalibar is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: She left me for her x, but changed her mind.

    Im ashamed i didn't pull some negs and teases on her but it seems like i dug my grave with the way I spoke to her. Any way to recover and get her?

    Please note I can use her friends to pull her closer, I can tell them to say anything to her... really am lost on this girl dammit.. this has never happened to me before she threw me off my game completely.

  6. #6
    thisisSPARTAAAA's Avatar
    thisisSPARTAAAA is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: She left me for her x, but changed her mind.

    Don't see anything damning in that convo. Plus, girls have reasons for not attending. Maybe she relly has work. Maybe she's on her period. You're definitely still in the game. Call her a few days later and ask her out again. But once again, she left you for an ex. That's BS; I'd dump her.

  7. #7
    AstroBoy is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: She left me for her x, but changed her mind.

    Don't worry man, you did get a little NEG in but it was too small for a follow up, i.e. your energy with the neg was low.

    I always use high energy texts and messages and find that the best way of gaming like that is to use mad punctuation and grammar, like "Hey nerd!! :P Stop being such a big spoil sport and get to the picnic!!"

    then if she has a low energy response to that like "Hi John, im a boring fuck blalalahahabllal" then you just blast the energy again man!

    I would have responded like so

    "You know! If you keep thinking and acting like that you will turn to DUST!!!!! Like seriously! DUST! Like an old witch or something LOL! Tell me a better reason than aww I only will have an hour, one hour of fun! Haha don't lie! You would totally stay! I know you would once you get there! Your Boring :P"

    Just use the energy man but you need to have it constantly no incongruousness high energy 24/7 with girls! It works for me man, like seriously!

    Recovery method one is use those lines above and tell her she has one more chance in life to be happy! That's it and be like come with me if you want to live!

    Recovery method 2 is subversive but convince her friends to drag her out and be honest about liking her to them, you will need a high level of social engineering skill for this but it's so do able it's unreal!
    We are limited only by our creativity.

  8. #8
    xcalibar is offline PUA in Training
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    Smile Re: She left me for her x, but changed her mind.

    Hi,

    Thanks for your quick responses, she's at work at the moment so maybe that is why. I understand you reaction is dump her even mine would be, but we really went well together. She is not normally so blunt and her using my full name has been replaced by pet names that we were using so she gone back to being distant.

    She had slept over a few times, and she is part of my main group so i will see her quite a bit. she's always been forward so this is a really weird conversation. I can try ask her out again, but I'm scared ill push her even more away and empower her thus her wanting me less.

    Her friend has told her that i was really find and normal and she was quite shocked about it. So I'm really at a loss how she didn't try at all to build a conversation.

    Again thanks for all your help, I've really lost the plot because of this damn girl.

  9. #9
    xcalibar is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: She left me for her x, but changed her mind.

    Quote Originally Posted by AstroBoy View Post
    Don't worry man, you did get a little NEG in but it was too small for a follow up, i.e. your energy with the neg was low.

    I always use high energy texts and messages and find that the best way of gaming like that is to use mad punctuation and grammar, like "Hey nerd!! :P Stop being such a big spoil sport and get to the picnic!!"

    then if she has a low energy response to that like "Hi John, im a boring fark blalalahahabllal" then you just blast the energy again man!

    I would have responded like so

    "You know! If you keep thinking and acting like that you will turn to DUST!!!!! Like seriously! DUST! Like an old witch or something LOL! Tell me a better reason than aww I only will have an hour, one hour of fun! Haha don't lie! You would totally stay! I know you would once you get there! Your Boring :P"

    Just use the energy man but you need to have it constantly no incongruousness high energy 24/7 with girls! It works for me man, like seriously!

    Recovery method one is use those lines above and tell her she has one more chance in life to be happy! That's it and be like come with me if you want to live!

    Recovery method 2 is subversive but convince her friends to drag her out and be honest about liking her to them, you will need a high level of social engineering skill for this but it's so do able it's unreal!
    So I should speak to her again and tell her that now? Also I should tell her friends to tell her that I really like her?

    Im trying to fully understand my next move.


    I was thinking of telling her hey sorry gorgeous, got sucked into a meeting and then go with your lines... and keep it high energy just like before.. she used to love it when i called her gorgeous.
    Last edited by xcalibar; 03-29-2012 at 11:42 AM.

  10. #10
    AstroBoy is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: She left me for her x, but changed her mind.

    Ok wait a clearer picture is being built here man, this chick digs you but the guilt and social pressure are whats keeping her at bay.

    She needs to be viewed as respectable and not a slut, and you need to be chasing her but not chasing her at the same time because she is just not going to pursue you. These are just the facts.

    My advice now in light of your recent comments is to go for high energy again later tonight and plug the picnic, I always play a risky game because I don't give a fark but that's just me. I never get hung up on chicks because I have seen how many appear when one flakes if you have the drive to just keep going.

    If you want to get her on the long low key scale without having to risk everything I would follow sparta's advice but one thing to say to sparta is that she went back to an EX through guilt and social pressure, not because she isn't into the target, her friends will be judging her on this and the hierarchy of women is total FUBAR, so she is simply on a defensive pattern to avoid negative rep.

    You can give the high energy responses but in your situation I think that this will push her over the edge, and possibly loose the game for you man it's maybe 50/50 but on the plus side I don't know you or this girl and that really makes a difference! If it was me I would go in high energy with playful NEGS and tonnes of push pull confrontations and roll on the fact that she see's I don't care about the fact all my cards (apparently) on the table (they never are)

    but I would say that solid beginner / intermediate game is to freeze her out for a day or 2 but I feel this wont work in this situation, She needs you to be sexually aggressive here and chase her and in light of that I say let the chips fall where they may my good fellow and get in there with some high energy and blow her away with your enthusiasm! Although wait until she isn't at work, the environment is clearly a factor here, and no more beta sh1t about her smiling it suits her, tell her she looks like a crazy person when she's not smiling or something and then make her laugh - This shows her she looks better when she's with you.

    Sorry if I'm harsh it's just that I write like I think and the smiling thing is a complete no dude,
    NEGS are your friends but always craft them so they lead back to positive connotations about you and her being together, this is a subtle art but when refined is just incredibly powerful.


    Sorry man I wasn't to clear I'm texting 5 girls and writing posts too haha!

    ~Astro
    Last edited by AstroBoy; 03-29-2012 at 12:03 PM. Reason: rewrite
    We are limited only by our creativity.


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