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  1. #1
    Marvellous045 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Confidence issue!! Big time! Need help.

    Hee guys!

    Im new to the forum , but i already introduced myself. But i need soms serious advice.

    Yesterday , me and my friends went to the club. It was a nice party and the club was recently re-opend. I dressed to impress. And how akward it felt ( i dressed diverent then i normally do) , i noticed that it worked. When i walked trough the club there was this girl looking at me , we made eye contact a several time. So i thought , im going to approach her. I walked to her blinked en said hi. She giggled said hi back , and she tilted her head en she blushed( i thought BIG IOI) but when that went through my mind. I froze! the remaining night i just could't get the courage to try to talk to her. Or to other girls.

    That's not the only time that i really froze. I know this girl for quite a while now. We didn't see each other in a year. But we bumped in on each other, we talked a bit (Didn't froze because i already knew her) And Monday we went on a dubble date with a other couple. Afterwards we went to my place to fluff. the couple left , but she staid. I got some IOI. But it took a while before i noticed them. So terrible. The next day she wanted to come to my place to watch a movie and fluf.( second time alone with her in one week). I got big IOI's . this time i noticed them when she gave them, but i was to scared to kiss her. But the worst thing happend when i brought her home at 4 in the morning. She invited me to come inside to show me her room( oke , everybody knows what that means). But i froze! i just could't. And before i knew it i was using a lame excuse that i had something to do in the morning and that i have to get home.

    Today she called me, and i didn't liked it. It was the let's be friends speech.

    So guys could you help me , so this can't happen to me anymore.

  2. #2
    SiliconMagician's Avatar
    SiliconMagician is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Confidence issue!! Big time! Need help.

    Quote Originally Posted by Marvellous045 View Post
    Hee guys!

    Im new to the forum , but i already introduced myself. But i need soms serious advice.

    Yesterday , me and my friends went to the club. It was a nice party and the club was recently re-opend. I dressed to impress. And how akward it felt ( i dressed diverent then i normally do) , i noticed that it worked. When i walked trough the club there was this girl looking at me , we made eye contact a several time. So i thought , im going to approach her. I walked to her blinked en said hi. She giggled said hi back , and she tilted her head en she blushed( i thought BIG IOI) but when that went through my mind. I froze! the remaining night i just could't get the courage to try to talk to her. Or to other girls.

    That's not the only time that i really froze. I know this girl for quite a while now. We didn't see each other in a year. But we bumped in on each other, we talked a bit (Didn't froze because i already knew her) And Monday we went on a dubble date with a other couple. Afterwards we went to my place to fluff. the couple left , but she staid. I got some IOI. But it took a while before i noticed them. So terrible. The next day she wanted to come to my place to watch a movie and fluf.( second time alone with her in one week). I got big IOI's . this time i noticed them when she gave them, but i was to scared to kiss her. But the worst thing happend when i brought her home at 4 in the morning. She invited me to come inside to show me her room( oke , everybody knows what that means). But i froze! i just could't. And before i knew it i was using a lame excuse that i had something to do in the morning and that i have to get home.

    Today she called me, and i didn't liked it. It was the let's be friends speech.

    So guys could you help me , so this can't happen to me anymore.
    My heart truly goes out to you. These are the truly heartbreaking failures. The ones where you know you are absolutely at fault.

    You had her in the bag. You had at least 3 separate opportunities to close the deal and have sex with her and you missed it. You even realize it. You blew it man. She didn't reject you. You rejected her, and it probably hurt her. 3 times she tried to get you to do your thing and you failed. You hurt her feelings. There is probably no going back now that it has reached this point. All you can do is chalk it up as a learning experience.

    I know you are kicking yourself in the ass right now and I feel for you. There is no other advice except don't be afraid of a woman who you are alone with in an intimate setting. Make your move and fark her. You should've taken her by the hand, looked her in the eyes, tell her she looked great tonight and then kissed her.
    That is all that can be said.

  3. #3
    Marvellous045 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Confidence issue!! Big time! Need help.

    Thanks man! I know. I really blew it! And i got a sore ass from kicking it. I hope i can use this as a motivation. Its so long ago for me, i just broke up with my girlfriend. 2de longterm relation ship. 2de girl i kissed and had sex with. And second girl that seduced me. I never seduced a girl. So this was a totally new for me. I dont think it that i will get another shot at her. But hopefully with the next girl i will fark her.

    But i was searching for a topic and book about my own body language and how to raise my own confidance. But i cant seem to find anything. Or are there things that i can do, like public humiliation. so that The next time i dont feel so ashamed in a presence of a girl. Thanks for your compassion man!

  4. #4
    nik's Avatar
    nik
    nik is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Confidence issue!! Big time! Need help.

    Quote Originally Posted by SiliconMagician View Post
    There is no other advice except don't be afraid of a woman who you are alone with in an intimate setting. Make your move and fark her. You should've taken her by the hand, looked her in the eyes, tell her she looked great tonight and then kissed her.
    That is all that can be said.
    While I think your intentions are great, I refuse to accept the first and last sentences you typed in the part I quoted.

    OP, where are you from? I presume English isn't your primary language.

    How old are you?

    I see you've had sex with two women before, both of whom were in control of? Everything? What decisions did you make? Think hard, even the slightest thing can give us something to build on.

    How are your relationships with women at work, school, wherever else? Tell us about those, please.
    I have failed more than most men have tried.

    Every woman you pass up is a woman you will never have.

  5. #5
    Marvellous045 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Confidence issue!! Big time! Need help.

    Yes , i had sex with them. And yes they were in control. No english is not my primairy language. My primairy language is dutch, i'm from the netherlands.

    I'm 21 years old. And in my opionion my relationships with woman are horrible ,useally i have problems to connect with them, and most of the woman i talk to are girlfriends of my friends. And almost everytime i ty to connect with a woman, i and up being there cuddlebear. The man they talk to about their problems.

    What do you mean by discisions i make? In my pasr relationships? Or the things that i say to a girl? My girlfriend didn't dump me. We felt like we were growing apart so we decided to go sperate ways. beacause with had a lot of issues with one and another. We both lost our intrest in each other.

    I just what to find another girlfriend, i dont what to be casanova. I just hate being their cuddlebear. Over and over again.


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