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  1. #1
    A_P_B is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default New to the board, I come here with a confusing problem!!

    Hey guys,

    Just joined this forum, some great reads all round, i must say.

    I have been out of the dating game for a year, due to different reasons and recently got chatting to a girl that added me on facebook ( i used to speak to her on msn around 2 years ago but was just a bit of chit chat ). Anyway she was being very nice, writing properly ie no slang, saying words like babe, baby etc, complimenting me on my looks and personality after we had spoken for a few weeks. She has great aspirations in life, wanting to be a doctor and is studying medicine, she is small, cute and very outgoing. So this was perfectly what i have been looking for since my last girlfriend! Someone hot but who has a great personality.

    Anyway, I asked her out and she said yes, leading to the date she was saying in texts things like " really excited to see you " " Nervous to see you cos i don't wanna mess it up " blah blah.. Also she was being quite dirty in some texts and we exchanged a few of those, as you do.

    We met up Saturday just gone, from the off she was touching me, flirting and then held my hand right away ( WTF is running though my head right now ) It tripped me out, it felt like she was my girlfriend or something. So i took her to a nice rustique pub, held some meaningful conversation, i was NOT just blabbing, was asking questions where she would feel something. She spoke 80% to my 20%. She was talking good, interesting stuff, not just boring old everyday sh1t.

    Then we went to another place, sat outside, she was kissing me within 5 minutes, telling me she loves my lips, kissing, she loved me touching her body etc etc etc.

    It literally felt like we had been dating for a year, THAT comfortable. I must add, at no point of us speaking have i been needy, un-confident or boring. I was cool, confident, she was laughing, enjoying everything. So we said goodbye after she mauled me again for more kissing. Then that night she was texting sexy things " when you had hold of me before i had so many naughty thoughts " Then she was more detailed of what she wanted to do, use your imagination here.

    The next day, i felt VERY flat, and i do not know why. She was taking 1-2 hours to reply ( and no she was not working or busy ) and being more basic and shorter with me.

    So she knows i am interested ( not in a weird, needy way ) She knows i want to f*** her and she knows i want to see her again - She asked me for the second date as she said she liked everything about me.

    Today, she has been taking hours to reply, latest was 4 hours!! ( she has her phone glued to her )

    Now i am thinking:

    1: She does generally like me, but she is trying to seem disinterested so i chase her and 'like' her more.

    2: She wanted to flirt and tease all along, getting me to think she is very interested in me, so i talk dirty back, kiss her back etc. Now she is simply just playing a game and is not very interested at all.

    I am CONFUSED, not in a way of that i am gonna chase her, just do not know how to say nicely " if you're just farking around playing games i aint interested ".

    THOUGHTS PLEASE, GUYS!!!

  2. #2
    Gambit is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: New to the board, I come here with a confusing problem!!

    I'm careful with getting too caught up in situations like these. She appears to have come on VERY strong. It sounds like she has gotten you to open up and is fun, but she has gotten you to come out of your frame. Right now you are valuing her as the prize and she knows she has you almost wrapped around her finger. I would back off a bit, as well as throw some negs toward her next time she brings up sexual stuff to make her feel like you might not be interested in hooking up with her. The harder she has to work, the more interested she will be.

  3. #3
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    Errant is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: New to the board, I come here with a confusing problem!!

    Ok Hold out for as long as she is at least, I know this can be hard and frustrating but it works, then you could send her something like this (borrowed from another post) .

    (her name) the kids are worried sick! You dont call you never write and Lexi (our dog) says he misses you.

    The guy who wrote this said it has a 100 percent success, I have been testing it over the last 2 days, on POF and so far its been awesome.

  4. #4
    DrDre007 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: New to the board, I come here with a confusing problem!!

    I believe girls like this are teasers. If you want to be a nice guy, just be friendly with her and be yourself. If you want to be a player, act interesting because she's maybe playing game with you. When she takes 4 hours to text you back, you should let her wait for 5 hours. If you stop being interesting, she will slowly slip away from you.

    Suggestions: Be flirty and energetic when you talk or text her. When she suggests a date on a certain day, you should take control and hold off that date until next week or something, this shows her that you are not too needy or into her like other guys do. Remember, Girls go after what they can't get.

  5. #5
    A_P_B is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: New to the board, I come here with a confusing problem!!

    Cheers for your input, fellas. I see sense in all of your post's. I must say that even though i have gone along with the flirting etc, under no curcumstances have i acted whipped, gave original compliments, chased texts. I have been laid back, NEGS have been thrown at her a lot, confident etc... My approach is not really what my concern is, it's what the hell she wants.

    I am sub-consciously acting in a 'player' mindset, due to my personal views on girls and all the stuff i have read. Of course not 24/7, nothing more annoying than having to think " is this what a player would say "

    She sent me a pic of her in suspenders and some other sexy gear, first i thought " no way, she has just took this for me " then when the dust settled i realised, and this is an interpretation btw, that maybe she has sent this pic to a few guys, which is fine, she is single! But not what i want. As i said, it's not a fact.

    I think CCR, calm, confident, relaxed does the trick!

  6. #6
    mrboxingfan is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: New to the board, I come here with a confusing problem!!

    You are doing basic beta male stuff that is wrong, your being needy, probably lose her. Get another on the string till then



    Quote Originally Posted by A_P_B View Post
    Hey guys,

    Just joined this forum, some great reads all round, i must say.

    I have been out of the dating game for a year, due to different reasons and recently got chatting to a girl that added me on facebook ( i used to speak to her on msn around 2 years ago but was just a bit of chit chat ). Anyway she was being very nice, writing properly ie no slang, saying words like babe, baby etc, complimenting me on my looks and personality after we had spoken for a few weeks. She has great aspirations in life, wanting to be a doctor and is studying medicine, she is small, cute and very outgoing. So this was perfectly what i have been looking for since my last girlfriend! Someone hot but who has a great personality.

    Anyway, I asked her out and she said yes, leading to the date she was saying in texts things like " really excited to see you " " Nervous to see you cos i don't wanna mess it up " blah blah.. Also she was being quite dirty in some texts and we exchanged a few of those, as you do.

    We met up Saturday just gone, from the off she was touching me, flirting and then held my hand right away ( WTF is running though my head right now ) It tripped me out, it felt like she was my girlfriend or something. So i took her to a nice rustique pub, held some meaningful conversation, i was NOT just blabbing, was asking questions where she would feel something. She spoke 80% to my 20%. She was talking good, interesting stuff, not just boring old everyday sh1t.

    Then we went to another place, sat outside, she was kissing me within 5 minutes, telling me she loves my lips, kissing, she loved me touching her body etc etc etc.

    It literally felt like we had been dating for a year, THAT comfortable. I must add, at no point of us speaking have i been needy, un-confident or boring. I was cool, confident, she was laughing, enjoying everything. So we said goodbye after she mauled me again for more kissing. Then that night she was texting sexy things " when you had hold of me before i had so many naughty thoughts " Then she was more detailed of what she wanted to do, use your imagination here.

    The next day, i felt VERY flat, and i do not know why. She was taking 1-2 hours to reply ( and no she was not working or busy ) and being more basic and shorter with me.

    So she knows i am interested ( not in a weird, needy way ) She knows i want to f*** her and she knows i want to see her again - She asked me for the second date as she said she liked everything about me.

    Today, she has been taking hours to reply, latest was 4 hours!! ( she has her phone glued to her )

    Now i am thinking:

    1: She does generally like me, but she is trying to seem disinterested so i chase her and 'like' her more.

    2: She wanted to flirt and tease all along, getting me to think she is very interested in me, so i talk dirty back, kiss her back etc. Now she is simply just playing a game and is not very interested at all.

    I am CONFUSED, not in a way of that i am gonna chase her, just do not know how to say nicely " if you're just farking around playing games i aint interested ".

    THOUGHTS PLEASE, GUYS!!!

  7. #7
    A_P_B is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: New to the board, I come here with a confusing problem!!

    Being needy? How did you identify that one?

    I am being laid back, confident, teasing her, taking a while to reply to texts, not being needy and showing her with compliments.

    Oh, yes, very BETA male behaviour!

  8. #8
    mrboxingfan is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: New to the board, I come here with a confusing problem!!

    yes you are, this girl has more game than you, your not ready for this type. Look at what your saying, your in denial.

    go out and experiment more... and get another on a string, she caught on to you, this girl is sharp, I bet she banged a few guys too on the down low, this is the type of girl that know how to cheat discreetly.

    deep down you were being needy

    Ive been there before....

  9. #9
    Gemini is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: New to the board, I come here with a confusing problem!!

    Hey man. Yeah, been there before, I'd bet most of us have.

    I'm with the other guys here, she out-gamed you by lulling you into a false sense of security. Unfortunately, most of us drop game when we know we've created an attraction, a mistake I made quite a few times in the past.

    I've learned that you can't drop game too quickly. I think you should only drop it to a low level when you intend to enter an actual LTR with the person, and I don't mean a few months, I mean like a year +.

    Just out-last her game, play the game back better.

    Good luck, man.

    : GeMiNi :&

  10. #10
    Gemini is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: New to the board, I come here with a confusing problem!!

    Also, like you said, she knows to want to fark her. That's her power. Once she knows this, she's gonna stop all the flirty stuff because she has you right where we want you.

    Women are like this, not fun, good thing people developed techniques to get around the rules lol.


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