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  1. #1
    noneother3 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default HB8.5 totally blurring me need help!

    I asked my boss out after I gave notice (got a new job). We went on 2 great dates-this girl was really feeling me, at the end of the 2nd date I told her that i LIKED her (which I regret). The problem was that the new job I taken required me to be in Kentucky for 2 weeks I told her this after our date she seemed fine. I asked would she see me again when I get back to nyc after those 2 weeks she said sure. 2 weeks passed and I didn't call her at all (which I regret) , I texted her once while I was away on business and I cut the conversation short (really busy with the new job). We went on a third date and in my opinion it was horrible! she seemed fine but I wasn't my best self. During our previous dates I got plenty of IOI's and I DHV and I closed with a kiss. The third date no such luck.

    Now I head back to kentucky for a week and I wasn't going to make the same mistake twice by not talking to her. so I texted her. no response. texted her again. one line response or "super busy". I left it alone. Next day text her no response at all. And then I made a big mistake I basically blew up her phone with multiple texts.
    I said "I would luv luv luv luv to get to know you-but ur killing me " (DESPERATE MUCH!!) So now I'm not feeling the love anymore from her. I tried introducing a mixtape to her via text but she thought they were creepy. So i put the kibosh on that. I send her a song for the day and call her beautiful (usually on fridays) and she responds to that favorably but how can one be sure- HOW CAN MIXTAPES BE CREEPY BUT A SONG FOR THE DAY IS PERFECT!?. but last sunday I hit her up and no response. I don't know what to do.

    I think I have partial ITIS(or i think im seeking validation from her). So what I am asking is this.
    How do I get her to become interested in me again (I still believe she's attracted to me but not as much)? I know if I can get her on a fourth date I can redeem myself. Please Help!!! I could just move on to the next one but I want to figure out how u draw a girl back in after u f*kc it up.

    Thanks
    Noneother3

  2. #2
    Cody's Avatar
    Cody is offline PUA All Star (RETIRED)
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    Default Re: HB8.5 tottaly blurring me need help!

    I'm sure you don't need to hear it, but Ima tell you anyway: Don't tell a girl you like her.

    I wouldn't feel bad about the not calling her for 2 weeks. You had said you would be away on work.

    After that--as you admit--you start tripping up. I would say move on to the next one but you explained that already.

    I recommend going MIA for a while. Maybe a few months then come back to it and ask her out again. Time does wonders my friend. People are always changing and after being gone for a while it's easier to show. Also consider PMing Virgil. If I had a question like this that's what I would do.
    Wondering where I am now? Check out my latest project:


  3. #3
    Virgil's Avatar
    Virgil is offline Moderator / PUA All Star
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    Default Re: HB8.5 tottaly blurring me need help!

    Yeah, you shouldn't have said you liked her. Not calling her for two weeks is fine, though. It shows you're a busy man and she's not on your mind all the time. Cutting the texting conversation short did the same thing. That was good.

    Your second paragraph is.... wow, I don't even know what to call it. It's super desperate as you noted yourself.

    The third date failed, but for most indirect PUAs who go on multiple dates, three dates without sex means exit. Because in such a situation it often means she's keeping you on a string or has no intention of having sex with you. Direct PUAs go on one or even no dates at all before f-closing.

    I noticed how you used the word "luck". There is no such thing. If you wanted to kiss her again, you should have led the situation there. You are the man. You are the leader. You are the alpha male. You decide if you want to kiss her and do so if you want to. You lead her.

    The combination of multiple dates and neediness has most likely put you in the friend zone. I'd recommend the same as mr.onethousand has. Let a few months pass by or even forget about her all together and move on.

    BTW I consider PMing me if you need help a compliment, thanks.

  4. #4
    noneother3 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: HB8.5 totally blurring me need help!

    Thanks guys much appreciated. I feel like she's waiting for me to do something alpha maleish to restart everything. but i'm not a mind reader. I thought she was a girl that didn't want to play games. but I guess they all do. Human nature I suppose.

    It just hurts cuz she was so hot. lol.
    thx


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