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  1. #1
    easyflow is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default How to recover from a bad first date

    The setting was this. First date, I was invited to an intimate party. 12 people were there, family and friends. Located in a private room in an upper scale restaurant. By the time I arrived the party was well started. One guest was a baller, ordering bottle after bottle of champaign, all on his bill. Corks were flying, at one point someone was showing personal sex images (penetration) from there phone. My date and her sister kept "attacking" the sisters BF, playfully biting him. Another time someone said "I want some cocaine", loud enough for the entire room to hear.

    I am just trying to paint a picture of the mood and energy in the room. None of this fazed, I've been around long enough and I adapted to the energy of the room. I was making jokes with people I just met, however a number of times my date would poke me and "SSSSHHHH" me, or quietly say "Shut up". I didn't really take her cue, cuz I didn't feel I was saying or doing anything wrong. Of course in hindsight I should have toned it down.

    However, a little later the sisters BF comes to me and says I have offended some people with what I have said. I was totally surprised. Porn is being shown, "I want Cocaine" is being yelled, corks are being popped alcohol is flowing, and somehow I am being offensive? I basically said "If I have offended anyone I apologize" and shook his hand.

    By this time my date was either embarrassed or ticked off or something, she had gone MIA. Most of the party had left, and I didn't go with them.

    As well, the baller who was buying the bottles asked me if I wanted to stay with the remaining guests and have some more drinks. I kindly declined and said my goodbye's. I have to ask, if I was so out of line, why would I get invited to stay afterwards?

    Also I should point out that when things were going good, I was getting major kino, and about 3 open mouthed kisses from my date. Her legs were crossed and I had my hand placed between her thighs. I rubbed the back of her neck, no hesitation from her at all. I did however neg her about a chicken pock scar she has.

    This was on Friday, all day Saturday I was thinking "What the f&ck did I do or say that was so offensive?" Today is Sunday, and I don't want to walk away just yet.

    I want to send a last ditch text, just apologizing for the night ending the way it did, and say

    "Thanks for Friday. Things didnít go very smoothly and I feel itís my fault. Unfortunately my nerves got the best of me, 12 new people on a first date :-( Next time I will bring the real me.

    Or I was thinking another route saying something like.

    "We can't fake attraction, the energy I felt between us, the kisses we shared, the physical contact. I am sorry things ended the way they did. Next time I will bring the real me."

    I'm sending a text either way, I just would like some feed back.

    Also is Sunday a god day, or would Monday be better?

    Ask any questions if not clear on something.


  2. #2
    PUA_Neo is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: How to recover from a bad first date

    I think that your biggest mistake was the neg. You shouldn't neg a girl if your running kino and she's not giving you any resistance. Negs should really be reserved for when she gets an attitude or needs to be knocked down a few pegs. Also, you never want to neg a girl about something she can't help, like a scar for instance. I would try and apologize for that comment, but try not to come off as whiny or needy.
    "The Matrix is everywhere. It is all around us, even now in this very room. You can see it when you look out your window or when you turn on your television. You can feel it when you go to work, when you go to church, when you pay your taxes. It is the world that has been pulled over your eyes to blind you from the truth." - Morpheus

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