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  1. #1
    Mopinion is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Having problems maintaining Sexual Attraction

    Hello,
    So this is the story.
    I've dated this girl for 3 months, it was great for the first month, then the attraction fizzled and we broke up after 3 months. A month after that we got back together, the first week, the attraction was back, then it once again disappeared. It has been 2 weeks since then and it is taking a toll on our relationship once again. I need advice on how to re-create and maintain attraction.

    Even pointing me to the best programs for maintaining it WITHIN a relationship etc.

    Any help is great appreciated.

    I am desperate.

    Thank you.

  2. #2
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    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Having problems maintaining Sexual Attraction

    Not sure what is happening in the relationship to have it die out so quickly. But I recommend and article you find on the net that has to do with sexual tension. Tension is probably what you are looking for and not attraction.

  3. #3
    Mopinion is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Having problems maintaining Sexual Attraction

    Here is some additional information:
    We are definitely happy together. The dynamic of the relationship is strange though. I'm having problems "leading" in the relationship. She has a very active both social and work life. I have a relatively active social life but I do not start working for another month or so and have alot of free time on my hand. We are both young (21 and 22). Her sex drive is almost completely diminished. I even find sex boring at times. I try to explore new things but she is very hesitant and not open to it.

    I read a bit on sexual tension, its interesting because it no longer exists even though our sex life is pretty much dead.
    It may be that im too nice to her or always available.
    I am not sure what to do to get this back on track.

  4. #4
    BatMan's Avatar
    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Having problems maintaining Sexual Attraction

    Being too nice and available may be the issues causing this. And what's great is that there are a ton of things you can try to see if they will help you. One of biggest things is that you may want to think about dating other women. This suggestion is more than just about a jealousy plot. This exercise is suppose to help you get some perspective about yourself and help you realize that you are a man that can meet other women so you don't have to put up with a "bad behavior" and you will be more likely to put your foot down (If done right, this will actually increase attraction).

    Also if you can fill your schedule up as much as you can to try and do stuff then do that. If the issue is money and you can't do much, then consider at least pretending that you are busy. Being just out of reach to a women can really be attraction. It's like waiting for your favorite video game to come out only for it to postpone on day of release. Being just out of reach would drive anyone frustrated (in a good way). It is an artform since pushing or pulling too hard can actually be counter intuitive. It takes some practice, but is a great tool to have. Hope this helps. Good luck.

  5. #5
    Mopinion is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Having problems maintaining Sexual Attraction

    Thank you very much for your advise.
    Just for clarification, since we are exclusively dating, how can I date other woman?
    Or is it more like, meet new woman and hang out with them etc.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Having problems maintaining Sexual Attraction

    Oh, well if you are exclusive then no I wouldn't recommend dating. But there's nothing wrong with have "female friends." That will still allow her to be suspicious. People's minds can sometimes do most of the work for us if you let their imaginations run wild without trying to fill the gaps in yourself. If she questions any female relationship you have, simply state that you are friends and that's it. Let her imagination do the rest and do not get into an argument about it. Because after all, you are an alpha male who has better things to do than deal with petty dramas and have other women at your disposal if need be.

    Also to add, make sure you do all this with air of unintention. If she feels you are doing it on purpose she will resist and it may backfire. She may even still call you on it.(that you are trying to get her jealous and it won't work.) DO NOT let this shake you. Simply treat her like she is being weird and dramatic and her accusation is nonsense.


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