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  1. #1
    Spetcnaz is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Facebook-Phone crash and burn.

    All right so there's this chick I talked to on facebook, all was well, she gave me her number, we talked a few times and I told her she is going to hang with me today, she said yes.
    Before that we were supposed to go on a little hike with some mutual friends, she also said yes(at the end my friend's car broke down and he was supposed to pick her up, the whole trip didn't happed)
    So that was yesterday, today we chatted a bit on facebook and started joke-arguing about the time we will go out(Be ready at 6, noooo that's too early, all right 6:30 but I'm being generous here) and all of a sudden, for no apparent reason, she just goes: "Oh by the way I am having a beer with a girlfriend today"
    "wait wait wait, we had plans"
    "yeah but I didn't say for sure i said we'll see"
    Later on, with a great need to understand wtf happened I asked when will we meet, she said "I dunno sometime", when i said I am in the same goddamn area she is in(different city) she said "ok have fun".
    Finally I've had it and I said: "listen how did we get from a point we were supposed to go out to the point we don't even give a shit we are going out in the same place"
    And she basically went "no big deal go out with friends"
    Guys, I am really losing it here, I was never flaked on the last second by a girl, never!
    WHAT THE F happend?!

  2. #2
    Spetcnaz is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Facebook-Phone crash and burn.

    One more thing, the last thing i said is
    ME:"I allways find something to do, I just don't get you"
    HER:"I just want to stay at home a big and then go out with a girlfriend for a beer"
    After that I really resisted the urge to curse her out and delete her from facebook, what now?

  3. #3
    mitkoberba is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Facebook-Phone crash and burn.

    I think it was a Sh1t test, and you didn't pass. You shouldn't have taken this so seriously i suppose.

  4. #4
    Spetcnaz is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Facebook-Phone crash and burn.

    Yeah I thought so too afterwards, guess it worked it threw me off balance, thanks man.
    What would have been a good response? just ignoring it and saying "I'll be there at X be ready" crossed my mind.

  5. #5
    Spetcnaz is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Facebook-Phone crash and burn.

    Also, is there anything I can do to save this situation from where it's at now?

  6. #6
    surferdude is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Facebook-Phone crash and burn.

    You should have shrugged off the flake and then don't initiate a text to her for a while. You can't act like what she did bothered you. Now she sees you as a needy AFC. That's hard to recover from. Just remember this mistake, and don't make it on the next one.

  7. #7
    Spetcnaz is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Facebook-Phone crash and burn.

    As in Just casually saying I'm cool with it and ignoring her for a few days?

  8. #8
    Spetcnaz is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Facebook-Phone crash and burn.

    I tried to save my own ass and I think it worked, I asked her something random that could have been interpreted as a question(I'm still waiting) about today and tried to throw her off balance about the whole thing, she bought it and this is how it goes:
    Her:"what"?
    Me:"what what, why are you so surprised"
    her:"lol I dunno you're so stubborn"
    Me:"First of all, I am subborn, second of all I don't think we're talking about the same thing"
    Her:"Listen I'm just not an option for today"
    Me:"hm... who said you were an option?"
    Her:"Then what's the deal?"
    Me:"I'm trying to find out too I have no idea what you're talking about"
    Her:"Because of the"I'm still waiting you know""
    Me:"I told you we're not on the same page here, You're a bad listener"
    Her:"Then what are you waiting for?"
    Me:"Wait hang on, You think that this is bothering me, is that what this is about?"
    Her:"what, not"
    Me:"Like you said, some other time"
    Her:"Yeah exactly"
    Me:"then what's the problem, you're driving me crazy here"
    Her:"No problem!"
    Me:"Maybe the next time I'm on leave(in 2 weeks), I'm booked for this week"
    Her:"yeah me too"
    Me:"No you're not you're too lazy"
    And the rest is fluff
    So, I elaborated as much as I can, I would really appreciate feedback =)

  9. #9
    whitedragon is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Facebook-Phone crash and burn.

    I wouldn't get into too many games like that. It carries a risk of driving her away and the denial will clearly show her you are actually bitter about it. How can a girl you never properly met drive you crazy? Only if you let her. At the beginning you could have said 'can I join you and your friend for a beer?' or 'fine, enjoy the night, call me later in the night if you want to chat' and go distant on her for a while if she doesnt call. If she has not met you in real life or knows you well there is far less obligation. If she already met you and liked you she would not only be comfortable asking you out to meet her friend but showing you off to her. Women are not stupid when it comes to playing emotional games so don't play them. It's better to say less with someone you don't know fully yet but make sure you say the right things, taking advantage of your male powers of logic, accountability and reason.

    Girls generally don't like talking about all the technical, meechanical aspects of a date or arguing with someone they've never met. You have to drive them emotionally so they absolutely want to see you. If she's going to hang with a friend for a beer instead of you then you didn't provide enough of a reason to go out with her. You have to win her heart not her schedule. When you ask someone out generate it not as a time or day of the week but an attractive offer with imagery of what you will do and how fun it will be for her. If she flakes, her loss, she will at least know what she is missing out on. I never neg hit a girl I've never met or got close with unless they are outrageously cheeky to me, never make assumptions about them, never get too concerned if they can't make it (they are after all a stranger). I don't get phased by anything they do until I'm more intimate with them. If they are not hooked by my honest intentions and charm fairly rapidly they probably never will be. I don't mean that in a defeatest attitude but it's jist a realistic and successful adaption to the numbers game and minimizing wasting time on flighty girls. I refuse to be anything but no.1 in a girls schedule.

  10. #10
    Spetcnaz is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Facebook-Phone crash and burn.

    Now that I think about it, I agree, I fell for it.
    I have met her and I do know her, we just never dated in any way and I wrote the whole convo to try and save my own ass somehow, think it worked and yeah, next time I'll know better.
    It is better to try and fail than not to try at all, I'll just scratch it off as a learning experience.


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