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  1. #1
    Mikalichov is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Having a boring past, but don't want to lie

    Hey guys,

    So I've heard that usually, relating what she is saying to when you were a kid was a good way to build comfort and DHV ("Oh, you like swimming, I loved doing that when I was a kid, I remember that one time, first time I felt so independant", bad example, but whatever)

    Except, I sucked as a kid. I mean, I still like who I was, but I was clearly an Omega Male haha. Would just stay at home reading books or playing games, don't do any sport, afraid of talking to anybody. It started to get better when I was 20 or so, but the whole "kid-time" is full of DLV

    BUT. I also heard that lying was really bad, and I believe it (since it always shows up at some point). So what should I do? Is there a way to use "I was an antisocial stayathome weak nerdy kid" into DHV? Or should I just use my 20+ as my "kid time" (even though it might not build comfort as well)?

    I know it's details, but I like explanations on details

  2. #2
    Virgil's Avatar
    Virgil is offline Moderator / PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Having a boring past, but don't want to lie

    I'm in the same (can't remember what word goes here) as you are. I, too, as a kid was bullied, addicted to videogames, etc.

    BUT I started working on myself. I started working out, kept a positive mind and studied on PUA which has made me much more social, and better with women. That is a huge DHV. You've had a rough time but crawled up and changed your life for the better.

    So yeah, you can easily be honest and still DHV. Just apply it to your own situation and mention anything positive you did to change your life for the better.

  3. #3
    surferdude is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Having a boring past, but don't want to lie

    The word you're looking for Virgil is "boat". :P

  4. #4
    pwonager is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Having a boring past, but don't want to lie

    Ever heard "Fake it, ti'll you make it" ? Read up on the Venusian arts. Sometimes you just have to make up some interesting stories until your life actually becomes interesting.

  5. #5
    Virgil's Avatar
    Virgil is offline Moderator / PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Having a boring past, but don't want to lie

    Quote Originally Posted by pwonager View Post
    Ever heard "Fake it, ti'll you make it" ? Read up on the Venusian arts. Sometimes you just have to make up some interesting stories until your life actually becomes interesting.
    This is a faulty piece of mindset. First off, fake it till you make it doesn't work. Not with stories, confidence or whatever, because you're trying to be something you're not, and it shows. You have to build up an interesting life, confidence, etc to be able to be genuine - which is important to become more of a man women want and to become more authentic.

    Second off, making up some interesting stories is going to get you trapped. Not only is lying non-alpha, but stories have to be congruent with what the people in there have experienced and if they are ever like "that didn't happen", it's a huge, huge DLV for you.

    Overall, this mindset won't help you in life either. I'm not trying to attack you here mate, but the "fake it till you make it" thing just isn't a good idea in my opinion. If you are ever in a situation where you really need the qualities you're faking, you will fail to show them because you don't have them.

  6. #6
    Mikalichov is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Having a boring past, but don't want to lie

    Well to be fair, my motto in life is:
    Pretend to be twice the man you are.
    Become the man you pretend to be.
    Repeat.

    But my life is awesome right now, no worries, and it's getting better and better. My trouble is relating stuff she says to my past without DLV myself.

  7. #7
    Virgil's Avatar
    Virgil is offline Moderator / PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Having a boring past, but don't want to lie

    If it's working for you, that's a good thing, keep on going. I doubt not being social as a kid is a DLV. A lot of people were totally different as a kid and it's about what you are like now. I think if you just tell the truth about how you were, it'll build comfort as well, even if you don't relate to her childhood.

    I could be completely wrong, but if you want to be sure, test it. Check her body language when you tell her your story and after a couple of girls you'll have your answer. This doesn't have to be with a girl you're picking up, but could be with any girl you've just met.

  8. #8
    chillout24 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Having a boring past, but don't want to lie

    Just don't talk about negative stuff....if a topic comes up and you realize that whatever you're about to talk about would be negative or DLV then just don't bring it up or be very vague about it. Being a mystery is a lot more attractive than telling her you spent years alone locked in your room playing video games.

    So if she says oh man I loved 9th grade or something, we went to so many parties etc. and all you did was play video games. And she asks you how was 9th grade for you? Just say it was fun and leave it at that.

  9. #9
    Mikalichov is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Having a boring past, but don't want to lie

    Ok, thanks for the advice guys

    Also, I'll do the body language tests you're talking about, Virgil, that's the kind of training routines I like

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Having a boring past, but don't want to lie

    Virgil makes a good point about the "fake it til you make it" concept. However I believe it may have been misconstrued a bit. When they mention "fake it til you make it" what they really mean is your level of confidence. I do not think it's a good idea to use other mens material because it will eventually catch up to you when someone realizes those stories didn't happen to you just the way it was mentioned above. But confidence is something you CAN fake to a degree. By changing your tone of voice and body language CONSCIOUSLY it will be like reverse engineering. Your mind will start to reflect what your body is showing and vice versa. You slowly become more and more confident.


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