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  1. #1
    bobat6 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default sarging failed badly - need help pls

    hey all,
    so last night, me and 8 other friends decided to hit the clubs, only 5 of us are single so we went out, drank, laughed at and made jokes, socialised with people, HI5'd tons of people, met old friends, danced etc..all in all HAD FUN,
    but than the music was too loud to communicate (or i thought it was because i drank a lil too much ), anyways i decided to go sarge(my first time) after about midnight (had 3 hours left until going home), I went in the club (all friends following me, and asking me were to go next) (being the AMOG?), i approached(without hesitation for the first time) the first girl (she was with 2 other friends, but her friends didnt try to cockblock me, but i had to repeat my name like 3 times before she heard it :/ + i had to lean in to talk, so the convo didnt last for more than a minute because i got bored with the too loud music :/

    i did the same procedure (moving from club to club or other areas of the club) and approached about 7 girls without hesitation again but again was too loud to talk :/ and since im kinda new to these things (+was a bit drunk), flirting was not going to be a good weapon for the night.. i couldnt rely on my friends help since they are no good wingmans (they dont even approach for themselves :/),
    so anyways my question is, what to do in these situations? i can't keep a conversation with that loud music, making Kino too fast will probs result in them moving away..

    any thoughts on what to do in these situations pls? (will go sarge again next saturday)

  2. #2
    Gemini is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: sarging failed badly

    Hey dude. I'm with you there, if I can't converse, then it throws me and my game suffers. However, recently, I have been building on this and, thanks to the guys on this forum, am getting better.To become good at PUA you need to become alpha male. With this comes confidence and with confidence comes a certain body language. This is what you have to rely on in clubs.

    Read this, it's like my bible on club game with a couple of my own additions.

    My additions: Make big gestures with girls, like spinning them on the dance floor., this builds social proof.

    Do not lean in to hear them. Lean back if you can. Of you lean in, you telegraph interest and it's hard to recover. Watch when you approach a set. If you lean in, the girl leans back. It gives the impression you're trying to get something.

    It may seem strange to kino escalate so quick, but most of PUA, I find, is counter-intuitive, so just go for it. If she rejects, just act as if it's no big deal and try again a bit later.

    Good luck, man.

    : GeMiNi :&

  3. #3
    sinister's Avatar
    sinister is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: sarging failed badly

    Great tips here from Gemini. The key in clubs is to draw her interest fast so you can move her from the louder parts. There is always an area within most clubs that isnt as loud and allows for better conversating. You need to try to arrive early enough to scout out these areas if the club is new to you. If it is somewhere that you frequent and you dont know where these areas are same thing. If your going to clubs that have VIP rooms available and are with friends, if you can financially swing it, its a good idea to reserve one. If not try to game some one who has one already and then utilize there VIP as a tool. I have always found this to be great because even if you dont know everyone but get welcomed into their VIP it is showing high social proof. Also they provide a quieter place to bring a girl back to or girls for everyone if you can manage.

    Another key thing if you cant get to the move phase is establish a superiority on the conversation. Being the AMOG as Gemini stated. As soon as you leaned into her with noise or not you DLV yourself. If you need to try to move closer to her so you can hear, and have her lean into you. If she allows you to move close enough to her this can also be an IOI. If a woman feels your invading their space they tend to back up.

    As far as Kino, like Gemini said, just go for it. If your acting like its a big deal and putting to much thought into whether to do it or not she will notice. If she shrugs it off when you Kino her just act normal, tell a DHV story and try again. 1 step forward 2 steps back is key. Especially in a Club scene.

    My best advice of all however would be to avoid clubs, stick with bars and lounges. Places where its not so noisy and therefore less to distract you and throw you off your game. Also minimize the drinking for multiple reasons:

    1: Drinking excessivley will not improve your game.
    2: While sarging if something goes terribly wrong you will not be able to reflect on it and fix the problem if the problem was you.
    3: It can become more difficult to catch subtle IOIs and also know when the proper time to escalate things is.
    4: Your breath never smells great from drinking.
    5: Unless well rehearsed you will not be able to fluidly DHV yourself and properly deliver your material.

    If your going to drink limit it to 1-3 at most for the night. If you have to have a drink in your hand so you dont feel like a chump then speak to the bartenders. Most bartenders are great at making look alike beverages so you can fit in so to speak.

    Best Wishes,
    Sinister

  4. #4
    bobat6 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: sarging failed badly

    @gemini, the only problem was keeping good body language i guess, because when i enter the club i enter perfectly, but than (cause i drank - my mistake, next sat im changing that) i probs lost some of the posture and i also leaned in to talk for 2 reasons, first it was loud and since i was going for the approach, not them i was the one leaning in a little but they leaned back in.. 2nd reason as to why i leaned in, is because im 5'11" and most girls are actually 5'7 or so..

    btw kino'ing immediately comes of as need i think.. doesn't it? and thx for posting the Suave Kino's link bro
    @sinister, great idea that of VIP, didnt think about it, i will try it sometime, even though not many teenagers get in VIP areas because they're broke, and so usually they are over 25 or so.. i should try and read some various DHV stories since im a little scarce :/,
    i like the 5 reasons you said there, and from now on will not drink that much

    @both, thanks a lot for replying and helping me out

  5. #5
    sinister's Avatar
    sinister is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: sarging failed badly

    The only reason Kino immediately will come across as needy is if you make it a big deal. If you keep your cool and treat it like a daily shower then your good and you wont appear needy at all.

    As far as your height goes, take a seat and even out the height as best you can. If she is sitting at the bar play a little playful joke, get her to stand up spin her around in a dancing matter and steal her seat. Doing this you are DHV yourself and when other women take interest they see you as being the approached and not the approacher thus establishing preselection.

    If your game is on point it wont matter how old you are to be able to pick up on a VIP group and be welcomed as one of them. I have spent many a night drinking for free because I gamed men and women of VIP groups.

  6. #6
    Suave Kino's Avatar
    Suave Kino is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: sarging failed badly

    I think the comcept of moving the girl to an area to talk is a mistake. If you kino and compliance test you can move forward much faster and veryh few if any words ever need to be spoken.

  7. #7
    brianborg is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: sarging failed badly

    what if when you approach, they just say "not interested", i tried different approaches yesterday, "hey, wanna dance" , "hi, whats your name", (another 1, i just started dancing with her - she was already dancing in front of me..), "tried the opener of 2 girls fighting outside" etc etc.. appraoched like damn 10 girls, but i cant continue from there.. i do in a confident way, only 2 of the 10 girls i hesitated a little (where HB10s, and the first 2 i approached), but the rest where approached immediately..
    any thoughts on what i might be doing wrong?

    (the girls i approach are usually not near a bar alone, but are dancing or with some friends)

    edit: i also changed clubs regularly so as to meet new people (talked even to males in a friendly way just to act as if i know lots of people in there etc etc)
    If You Always do what you Always Done, You will Always Get what you Always Got

  8. #8
    sinister's Avatar
    sinister is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: sarging failed badly

    First Mistake: Dont dance with girls unless they suggest it. For two reasons, one especially if you just try to approach them like that it can come off creepy. Two, how much talking is usually done when you have a girl grinding you. Its a waste of time to approach on a dance floor IMO.

    Second Mistake: Asking their name shows needness when its used as an opener. You want her asking your name then you can spin it around and get hers.

    Now onto the advice.

    First: You dont have to be searching for women alone at the bar. Chances are there are women sitting in groups at the bar as well. Very uncommon is it to find all the women are dancing. Change your approach groups, and that should help a number.

    Secondly: Now I am a psychiatrist so I am speaking from experience, however I obviously wasnt there to be able to give you a full critique on your approach, but most of the time when you say you opened with confidence that is a false affirmation to yourself so you feel good about what you did. That can be with anything. If you have to confirm to yourself you are a good person all the time you might need a personality make over. Not to talk bad about you at all, but usually thats what that means. Now you did well in your number of approaches, as well as changing your venue.

    The advice from here would be that your sticking point would be everything after the open. And your openers are a little weak.

    That being said lets break down the opener:

    No matter what you say if your approaching with an alpha attitude and confidence then you can really open with anything. This is key not the words themselves. Now if you have confidence issues thats easy to fix, but if your relying on an opener you need to make sure it can be continued into a conversational building block to get them talking. Thats why the girls outside fighting is a good one for some. Its easy to prereahearse and can easily spark interest from any group. On top of that it is also advisable to establish a flase time constraint because it takes off the worry of whether you will be around forever disturbing them.

    Next: Everything after the opener is all your personality. You have to convey confidence through the whole process you cant just be confident in your approach and give up on the rest. Mold your personality to something people want, and that doesnt mean be fake. It means practice at improving yourself until it becomes habit. An example of this is in the Game: The guys of project hollywood became social robots because they practiced styles and mysterys stuff that those two personalities they faked to have for so long it actually became there habit thus making it really their personality. So practice what works with your current personality. List all of your alpha traits, and all of your beta traits. Everything from your speech and the way you talk, is it clear and consise and properly delivers a message or do you find your self stutterring and slurring your words or speaking to softly and quick. Your body language, do you fold your arms when you talk thus displaying a lack of interest or showing your shy by putting your hands in your pockets, are you fidgety, or do you stand up straight, chest out, shoulders back, chin pointed slightly up, and you walk into a room like you own it, as well as everything and everyone in it. When your approaching a group do you focus on making eye contact with everyone in the set, not standing over them for too long while theyre seated, and things of that nature or do you approach from behind, and look around the venue anxious.

    With your personal appearance, do you dress well or like a slouch, are you smelling good or like BO. How does your breath smell?

    All of these are things you need to look at. Have a friend help you out. Someone who you trust male or female, who will give you honest feed back instead of saying what you want to hear. Take notes and then research how to fix these things. Dont take anything personal they tell you because it is all part of a proccess of building a better you. Also in doing this you may be able to have them want to perform these practices as well and then you can mold yourself a pivot or a wing.

    When it comes to a set, put a digital recorder in your pocket so you can hear your speech around people your not comfortable around.

    To fix your confidence level stand infront of a mirror and take a few pictures just as you are normally as emotionless as you can. Then find something that pumps you up. At though or a song, something that makes you feel invincible and like your ontop of the world. Listen to it or think about it then get in front of the mirror with that energy take some pictures and look at how much different you appear. Then come up with some affirmation statement and repeat it as many times as you feel neccessary. Here is an example:

    "This is me at my best. I am bold, courageous, strong and wise. This is who I want to be at all times. This is how I am. No person or force of nature can knock me off my pedistal for I am the man. I am an alpha. I run this show. My show. I make the rules and I control who is playing this game and I control who wins."

    Something to just beef up your attitude. Dont be shy to say it aloud to yourself. Now also dont repeat that one word for word unless it truly fits you. Find something that is unique to you.

    Hope this helps.

    Best Wishes,
    Sinister

    PS: If they say not interested this is a B1tch shield or ASD. Look up articles on here to help with that.


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