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  1. #1
    brianborg is offline PUA in Training
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    Default help after approach in clubs

    sup, i got a problem when i approach in clubs, they just say "not interested" or turn their head around, i tried different approaches on Saturday, "hey, wanna dance" , "hi, whats your name", (another 1, i just started dancing with her - she was already dancing in front of me..), "tried the Opener of 2 girls fighting outside" etc etc.. approached like damn 10 girls, but i can't continue from there.. i do it in a confident way, only 2 of the 10 girls I hesitated a little (were HB10s, and the first 2 i approached), but the rest were approached immediately..

    any thoughts on what i might be doing wrong and is it normal for beginners or because they think I'm ugly or something ? (i rate myself as average though)

    (the girls i approach are usually not near a bar alone, but are dancing or with some friends)

    I also changed clubs regularly so as to meet new people (talked even to males in a friendly way just to act as if i know lots of people in there etc etc)
    If You Always do what you Always Done, You will Always Get what you Always Got

  2. #2
    T-Mal's Avatar
    T-Mal is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: help after approach

    Remember to think about how many other guys asked her those exact questions.... "Hey Wanna dance?" or "Hey What's your name?"

    Her B1tch shield is running on auto response, and your approach kept it at full power.

    Try something like telling her "Wow, very cool shoes..." And smile but keep walking.
    She'll most likely come track you down and want to talk to you, because you were different & didn't "hit on her" (yet!) heehee!!

    Always ask yourself, "what are all these other guys saying to her, that keeps getting them blown out?"
    Then be different.

  3. #3
    brianborg is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: help after approach

    but wouldn't complimenting her shoes or some of the clothing make you look g@y?
    If You Always do what you Always Done, You will Always Get what you Always Got

  4. #4
    dgmortal is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: help after approach

    Remember when you approach, you must bring a good vibe into conversation.
    you should assume rapport and talk to her like you always know her.
    if she rejects you don't take that seriously, continue your conversation. act like your didn't notice her rejecting you, but if she persists on rejecting you, you should pay attention to how her rejects you, pay close attention to IOI's she gave you, if she rejects you without any shyness or haven't give you any IOI, thats a rejection that should be taken seriously, otherwise they just want you to try harder, so try harder! use some banter lines and try to make a joke from her rejection!

    You are just at the beginning of the road, don't lose your confidence yet

  5. #5
    whitedragon is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: help after approach

    Quote Originally Posted by brianborg View Post
    but wouldn't complimenting her shoes or some of the clothing make you look g@y?
    Not at all. Most guys haven't got a clue about womens fashion and most women cannot help but chat about fashion. You can compliment women on fashion or neg them. I fully expect many girls to be not interested when I go out. You try and keep moving on. It's not based on looks - an ugly girl might pan you off because she's having a girls night out, a hot girl might talk to you for hours. So be persistent and most of all be observant. Certain girls out on the town are never going to be interested, other girls even before they have gone out will have already decided they are going to get action. Women are always engineering the situation so analyze which girls are sending what signals. Their signals are much more subtle than men so even a brief glance your way could mean she's interested. Just go out and have a good time and be a happy confident guy to be around. Don't be desperate to get numbers - be yourself, chat openly and with charisma and good things will come your way. The best nights out happen for me when I least expect it. It's a numbers game you just gotta keep casting and not worry too much about the women who are not interested.

  6. #6
    Gemini is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: help after approach

    Hey dude. The other guys gave some solid advice. Hopefully tat helped you. One thing you also haw to remember is that opening isn't all about what you say and how you say it. Tate a fair chunk of it but your body language counts too. If you're body language conveys too much interest, they'll get the impression you want something and b1tch shields go up straight away. When you're in set, lean back and seem as if you might walk away at any second, especially when you've hooked the set. An important rule, don't peck. When in conversation in a loud environment, we have the automatic urge to lean in to hear. Don't obey that urge. You'll notice it you do that when you've just opened the set, they will lean back as you lean in, let them lean into you. Hope that helps.

    : GeMiNi :&

  7. #7
    Bumac is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: help after approach in clubs

    I agree with the guys, and a comment on clothing won't hurt you at all. When I was in college I told an HB8 at the end of class that I thought she had a cool belt, because I thought that she had a cool belt. I didn't think anything of it but the next week in class she came and sat next to me and asked me if I wanted to go to a new Tapas place after classes.

    Point is that an out of the box open (intentional or not) will at the very least pique a woman's interest. Have you seen Night at the Roxbury? right now you're rolling with the "Sup? You from outta town?" opener and that's not going to work as often as you might hope.

    Also points brought up about body language and leaning are very true. Keep at it and you'll start seeing results, just remember anything other than a success was just practice!

    Good luck bro.


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