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  1. #1
    Rusty_York is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Trouble building attraction

    Hey everyone thanks for taking the time. I am VERY new to this, but I've been going out lately and the same problem seems to keep occurring for me.

    Last night I opened a few sets failed to open a few but the re-occurring theme I seem to keep struggling with is building attraction.

    I open
    get names without giving mine
    ask how everyone knows each other
    attempt to DHV which i know i need work on
    attempt to neg which I really need work on
    then................ ...poof
    I dont know where to go from there and every thing seems to go to hell
    They just become kind of fluff conversations where I'm asking a lot of boring questions which I know isnt good

    any help guys?

  2. #2
    The Red Baron's Avatar
    The Red Baron is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Trouble building attraction

    There are lots of options on this, but it sounds like you need more interesting things to talk about. Search around on the forums or elsewhere for more interesting questions and topics to talk about, like the cube game. Have a few things in your reservoir

    I think you need to work on how you react to their responses, when a girl tells you what she does you should try to follow up with what that tells you about her, make insights, learn deeper things about them and what motivates them, what they want out of life, etc. it will make your conversations much more engaging
    Never need praise, sympathy, or approval



  3. #3
    SonnyCurtis is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Trouble building attraction

    This may sound like sacrilege but try and have fun with it. Get out of your head. Exude positive energy, girls love that. Use the techniques/routines as a baseline but if you follow them religiously you're gonna look like a robot. Boring, unattractive, potentially creepy.

  4. #4
    BatMan's Avatar
    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Trouble building attraction

    You made a great start and since you are new, expect to make mistakes and possibly even be embarassed. We have all gone through it and I still have moments of "I probably shouldn't have done/said that," lol. A nice little principle to follow when you're starting is that being interested is interesting. People naturally like to talk about themselves so feel free to ask questions. ( Try to ask open ended questions) If you feel that you are falling into the "interview trap" then mix it up with some teasing and talking about yourself. Eventually things will start to click after you gain experience. Hope this helps and good luck.

  5. #5
    Rusty_York is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Trouble building attraction

    Thanks a lot guys this all seems like really solid advice!

  6. #6
    Mikalichov is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Trouble building attraction

    Also, don't stay for too long in a set, don't hesitate to leave for a while, meet other people, then come back to continue the discussion

    One other option, if you know your flow well, is to go fast for the number/date, after the beginning convo, start going "oh, we should totally do [cool activity], wait, I have to go, just give me your number and I'll contact you again"

  7. #7
    Conquistador82's Avatar
    Conquistador82 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Trouble building attraction

    Start by no hitting on your target at first, neg her, and bust her balls later on. Be cocky and funny..that will get the job done!


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