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  1. #1
    uksociology is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default I k-closed and n-closed but need advice

    Okay i just ended a 5 year relationship and am undergoing NC to get over her and maybe we'll get back together if things change but not now.

    I went out on friday and approached this girl she was a little older than me (4 years), i introduced my self westarted rabbiting on about the music etc. i moved on to "so what do you do?" she replies with work i say "no no i mean what gets you going, what do you enjoy? what turns you on?"

    she reeled off what she enjoys kick boxing, keep fit, squash, we start joking around and i start saying i'll kill her at squash etc i don't take prisoners etc etc, all the while she's leaning in and i start keno. i say im going for a cigaret, she replies she has nicotine tablets/ mints she shows me it on her tung, i say "can i try one?" and she holds her tung out and i take it with my tung then give it back. I move the conversation on then say "i'm going for that cigaret and then to another bar, why dont you give me your number and we can meet up"
    she replied "i will give you it but just as friends" i said "im okay then i don't need it it was nice to meet you" i went out for my cigaret and within minutes she came out and i k-closed, then got her number with no suggestions of just friends, we kissed alot more that night and even when she left i pulled her again, she had to go and i was staying (foolish of me)

    i then realised i was being stupid and text her

    why don't i come round make sure you get a good night sleep

    no reply, foolish of me

    next morning i text her

    ha just read that text back that was a bit upfront, im not saying sorry though i ment it....then ended it with a jokey question.

    no reply so i decided to forget about her and not waste my time

    then my friend explained she had a boy friend! made sense

    i text a few days later saying hey i'm gonna stop texting, "friends name" explained you had a boyfriend its all good, you seemed cool though so would still like to kick your ass at squash if you want just as "mates""

    bam instant reply she said

    " yeah i did try and say on friday just mates, blah blah blah"

    we text back and forth for a while then she added me on twitter but wouldn't give me her face book because she said her boyfriend was on there also. we said we would play squash next monday/tuesday

    my question is do you think this is a lost cause or do you think i could still game this and get an f-close?

    im not going to rest on it im going out this weekend to look for other options, but she was cute

    any advice on how to f-close or should i cut it off?

    any help would be really cool.

  2. #2
    DandyLion's Avatar
    DandyLion is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: I k-closed and n-closed but need advice

    Uksociology,

    Let me break down for you and show you where you went wrong. We'll both learn from your experience.

    1) It doesn't matter that she has a boyfriend, that's just an obstacle to be surmounted
    2) You've texted her 3 times to 1 reply (DLV); you broke the 1 to 1 exchange (DLV), and secondly, your texts came off as needy and seeking her approval (DLV)
    3) You just friend zoned yourself (DHV), but you must use the Boyfriend Destroyer on her if you want to f-close

    With that being said, I think you've dug your self into a little whole, because she already friend zoned you on Friday when she said she just wanted to be mates.

  3. #3
    uksociology is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: I k-closed and n-closed but need advice

    Yeah that's what I thought, although the positive i took from the friend zone on Friday was that I refused her number then by doing that escalated to a k-close. I think if I'd read the boy friend destroyer I would have avoided that whole thing, tricky as I didn't find out till later, although I think the damage was done with the texts. Cheers for the reply and help man!


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