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  • 1 Post By Starkiller

Thread: Maintenance on your game when you're in a LTR?

  1. #1
    chillout24 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Maintenance on your game when you're in a LTR?

    I'm in a LTR currently, and I feel like my game is suffering. When I go out I feel AA just approaching women, which I didn't used to have when I met this girl. I don't want to cheat on this girl I'm seeing, but I feel like if I open sets without the intention of number or kiss closing that I'm not fully exercising my game. And if I do number or kiss close I would feel like I was cheating on her. I know I could just get a new girls number and not call her but then karma would get me back because the new girl would be angry and upset at me.

    I am relatively new to game, only been at it about a yr and half. So I'm wondering you guys who were in LTRs...How did you maintain your game during the LTR? when you got out was it a struggle to get back to your PUA game? Or was it as easy as going out a couple times and getting over your AA easily?

  2. #2
    Starkiller is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Maintenance on your game when you're in a LTR?

    First things first, I am a tad unclear on whether you are in a exclusive relationship with her. In other words, have you specifically talked with her about that. If you are, running sets for the sole intention of having a good time and sharing that with others if perfectly fine. You'll be utilizing and honing social skills, which I think would make it easier to get back into the game

    It seems to me like you're really developing feelings for her, and thats giving you the AA and making you feel as if you're cheating

    In terms of getting back in after a LTR, I cant give you anything of value. I'll be leaving that alone for a more experience person to contribute their two cents

    I really hope that helps. Good luck mate

  3. #3
    Conquistador82's Avatar
    Conquistador82 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Maintenance on your game when you're in a LTR?

    Once you become a PUA you rarely go back to the way you were before, and that is a good thing. At least I am don't want to go back and be a AFC, that said, you can always have a none-exclusive relationship with your girl. But if that is not that possible, you have to learn how to handle more than one girl at a time. Having more than 5 girls at the same time is difficult to manage, since there are only 7 days in a week! As a guy and PUA I have made peace with my nature, thus if i can have a one night stand, I will as long as the girl I am having a one night stand understand that I am not interested in more than that. And by mentioning that 'I am not boyfriend material" or "that I don't do relationships" she gets the message! And remember that you only cheat...when you are caught!

  4. #4
    Starkiller is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Maintenance on your game when you're in a LTR?

    Quote Originally Posted by Conquistador82 View Post
    And remember that you only cheat...when you are caught!
    All due respect I disagree with that. I do agree completely with what Cody and Virgil said on another thread, so Im going to quote that. They've phrased it very well

    Quote Originally Posted by Cody View Post
    I learned this from Virgil: We aren't players, we're pick up artists. There is a difference. Players lie to women in order to get what they want. PUA's don't because they don't have to. I consider dishonesty and immoral conduct lying. I try not to preach morality, but honesty is one I stand firm on because it is a PUA axiom.
    I think communication and clarity are key. If you are in an exclusive relationship you dont go for escalation with other women because you don't need to. You already have an exclusive GF. Now if you really want to, then you first need to have a conversation establishing that your relationship is no longer exclusive

  5. #5
    Conquistador82's Avatar
    Conquistador82 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Maintenance on your game when you're in a LTR?

    It is always better to be honest with a girl, but from experience...some girls can not stand the truth and rather be happy believing what you tell her! And we shouldn't apology for our replication instinct!

  6. #6
    chillout24 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Maintenance on your game when you're in a LTR?

    Hey the situation is that we haven't discussed being exclusive, we haven't even discussed if we are bf/gf officially but we have been seeing eachother a lot for the past few months. She isn't very open talking about it but I definitely get the feeling she doesn't want me seeing other girls. And I don't want her seeing other guys either which I think is why I don't want a non-exclusive relationship. I just want to have all my PUA skills in case we break up and not spend months getting back to where I was when I met her, so I am trying to practice but don't want to get into anything with another girl.

  7. #7
    Starkiller is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Maintenance on your game when you're in a LTR?

    Have that discussion with her and figure out where the two of you stand. Until the two of you have that talk, you're not in a relationship with her

    Dont worry about losing game. Even if you dont go out and run sets every week the forums still let you stay in touch. Certain parts of the game (ex: alpha behavior) get internalized and you dont have to relearn it. If the relationship doesn't work out you'll be back in no time at all

    Quote Originally Posted by chillout24 View Post
    I am trying to practice but don't want to get into anything with another girl.
    I dont have experience on this but it sounds counterintuitive. If you repeatedly get to the point where you can k-close or n-close a girl and consciously stop yourself from pulling the trigger, thats gonna turn into a bad habit which will later have to be broken. Again, I dont have any experience with what you're talking about


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