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Thread: Did I mess up?

  1. #1
    Kliko is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Did I mess up?

    I was in Paris for 2 weeks to learn the language, and the last week a cute girl came into class, smiling and looking at me. On my last night I made out with her. 3 weeks of messaging followed, she was coming to visit Amsterdam and I offered to show her around. Re-initiated attraction, and kissed again.
    What was weird, it that after that "first" kiss she said "Why did I had to initiate the kiss in Paris?" I was baffled, I didn't know what to say. The kiss itself: I started with "are you are good kisser? " Which got me a positive reply. Then we put our foreheads together, but she is a bit shorter, so at that time I found it hard to reach for her lips, I thought she first had to raise her head, which she did.
    But why does she make such a big deal out of this?

    Moving on, attraction went through the roof! For example, Saturday night we went clubbing, and she would be kissing my neck, so I was like "Let's go to your hostel" which she replied "I'm sleeping with 2 other people in the hostel". Sounded like a legit answer. Later, I asked again, she said "But its only our second date!"
    Again, I didn't know how to respond. How would one correctly escalate for sex? Just drag her out of the club? :P

    day2, I think I was too nice. I guided her around town for the day, I took the lead. We had fun, talked a lot about everything. I think I gave too much compliments about how I like her, and at the end of the day I said like: "Not only you are attractive, but I like you as a person too! Had lots of fun today!"
    Yeah, in retrospect I went overboard there :')
    On the plus side, you could tell from body langauge she was attracted to me, holding hands and stuff.

    End of the day she said "thank you, I've had the most amazing day today" Which is good, but the next day she was leaving and I didn't plan a rendez-vous. Stupid. That evening I messaged her on Facebook like: "Hi sunflower! Had an amazing day today! See you tomorrow! Xxx" implying I wanted to see her, of course. :P
    Next message was full-blown beta: "You know, nice isn't half as nice as Amsterdam I want to see you! where are you? Xxx"
    No reply.

    PS: we went clubbing on Saturday, and as a result of that I only got 2 hours of sleep, that doesn't help very much :P

    The point of this post is to get pointers. what went good? What went less good? I still need to learn a lot :P

  2. #2
    T-Mal's Avatar
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    Default Re: Did I mess up?

    First of all, it's totally OK to let a girl know you think she's attractive, if you've already built the comfort & rapport; and have spent some time with each other.
    You just don't want to do that in the beginning stage of meeting & building attraction.
    So don't worry about that.

    (I tell my girlfriend I think she's adorable, or stinkin' cute, or lots of other complements all the time.)

    As far as her asking why she had to initiate the kiss?
    You can tell her that she didn't... it was because you just created the right vibe because you were interested in her, & she became affected by it & wanted to kiss you.
    So YOU actually initiated it by being "a man".

    Just flip the script on her like that.
    It'll let her know you're not caught off guard by her question, AND demonstrate that you possess "alpha" qualities, without actually saying it outright.

    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

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