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  • 1 Post By whitedragon

Thread: 1 year and no progress... help.

  1. #1
    liquid_fun21 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default 1 year and no progress... help.

    Please bear with me,

    So basically I want people to point out what i'm doing wrong. I discovered PUA at the beginning of this year. I'm 20 years old now. I've never had a gf, never flirted, never texted, never done anything. My experience was literally zero. After scraping with death and the very real possibility of dying alone I decided to turn my life around. PUA was my light at the end of the tunnel.

    Progress:

    At first I went sarging in clubs alone. It was very nerve wrecking and I failed horribly. I decided that I'd have plenty of time for cold approaches later when I'm better, for now I wanted to get good at the social game and dominate college. Since the beginning of this year, I have created a Facebook account. I have 57 friends on Facebook after one year. But only made one real friend with whom I can talk, this guy himself has only 40 friends on FB. I started dressing better and adopting better posture and tone.

    However, until now I have received no IOI's at all. Here's what I've learned. Most normal people have "tribes". And the guys have access to the girls within their tribe. When you meet someone in uni, because of that initial location of meeting they automatically classify you as "just an associate". But when you meet someone through a friend, you classify them as part of the "tribe". Also people branch out from their tribe by referral, so the more friends you have the more friends you get. It's like a cycle.

    As for me, I have no tribe. Most people's tribes are built in school or the years leading up to adult hood, but I changed many schools and countries (dozens) so I have no base. I've always been an outcast so to speak. When you think about it normal people are the anti-social ones here, because they are the ones always in their comfort zone. But I've had to initiate conversations with complete strangers and befriend them. Still, making random associates here and there is hardly any progress.

    What I need is to get into a tribe and spend some proper time with the guys and girls to build rapport and comfort. How do I do this? I've joined an anime club but it was insufficient for this purpose. I've also joined a futsall club outside of uni but again little progress.

    A year after discovering PUA, I'm still in the same place I was. I know i'm doing it all wrong. Can anyone help me out here with some advice? Thanks guys.

    Liquid

  2. #2
    whitedragon is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: 1 year and no progress... help.

    1) you're young. It gets better as you get older.
    2) Just keep trying to improve your friendship circle and don't be put off if things don't happen straight away. It took me ages to get my first girlfriend.
    3) Join clubs or activities that lead to women. Dancing classes, learn guitar, drama classes. Try self help books. Some of them are corny but i always liked the odd quote out of them and still live my life by that.
    4) Get a part time job so you have money
    5) Have fun and enjoy the journey, and don't focus on the destination so much. You're not failing, you're gaining experience.

  3. #3
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    Cody is offline PUA All Star (RETIRED)
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    Default Re: 1 year and no progress... help.

    Forget girls for now and focus on making friends. If you have friends girls will come. You understand the basic dynamic of a social circle, now get inside one, or ten.
    Wondering where I am now? Check out my latest project:


  4. #4
    liquid_fun21 is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: 1 year and no progress... help.

    Quote Originally Posted by Cody View Post
    Forget girls for now and focus on making friends. If you have friends girls will come. You understand the basic dynamic of a social circle, now get inside one, or ten.
    Geez, you make it sound so easy.

  5. #5
    eMtoN is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: 1 year and no progress... help.

    Actually, it sounds easy because, after all, it is! All you have to do is get up, get out and get something (as the song goes) ;-)

  6. #6
    whitedragon is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: 1 year and no progress... help.

    Also just enjoy YOUR own life. You don't have to have stacks of amazing friends. When I was younger I would routinely go off camping by myself or do some hobby. I actually crave to be alone sometimes. You end up doing a lot of cool stuff and you can use that as stories to attract other people: 'hi there. Like your dress. Have you ever climbed mt warning at dawn to watch the sun rise? It's beautiful...you have to hike the mountain in the dark, it's scary, then you pull yourself up ladders and chains to the top and the sun pierces through the day warming the soul'.

    Find it hard to just go out and do it? I dare you to go climb mt warning at night for the sunrise. Its only a 2-3 hour drive from where you are.

  7. #7
    ridemyr1 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: 1 year and no progress... help.

    allow myself to chime in for myself.....

    your situation sounds lot similar to mine in a way.

    I'm in the military. I been in for a while and unfortunately due to my rank I can't hang out with many people. The dudes/chics of lower rank can get me in trouble if I hang out with them. The dudes/chics of my rank are all married with kids. The dudes that are not married are freaking CHODES and don't know how to act. The lower my value when I'm out with them because of how they act. You know the type....

    Anyway. The question is how does this help you?

    Since my only boy who was down for whatever and knew how to carry himself left to Cali which makes me fucking hate him because Cali is awesome! I am now forced to roll by myself. Like you stated it is nerve wrecking but whatever after the first time where I flopped badly it was so pathetic.... I said fuck it I challenged myself so I still viewed the whole thing as an achievement.

    Anyway, I been out since then and suddenly it hits me. On the first joint I go into I know I'm gonna flop. It just a warm up. I leave to another place and do cold approaches in this one also, now I'm getting there. I hit a third joint and BOOM! I'm yapping away with people. Other people talk to me. I do magic tricks and gets them going. I show it to guys and they wanna learn them. Dudes/chics comment on my fedoras and shake my hand, put on my hat, give me kisses and so on. The guys, I use them for value so I don't look like a weirdo or a loser. The ladies well you know what I use them for and that is to find that one pretty little creature that's gonna have fun with me. At the end of the night I have new friends, the bartenders now recognize me and give me props and the list goes on.

    What am I getting at? dude just roll with the blows, every night you go out you are a better man then you were before. In one way or another you are going to learn something new about yourself. If you flop yeah it may hurt a tad bit but brush it off and move on. When a chic blows me off I just keep moving. Why stay there and entertain her ass? trust me!

    Also, I tell you this much. Sometimes you will see a dude approach a chic that's in a set of 2 or 3 or whatever. He might be rolling solo so last night I tried something new and just moved in on a set that a dude was running game on and was hurting. So basically I winged his ass and I didn't know him. Now I have 3 new drinking buddies and all because I stop giving a shit and just roll with the blows.

    Don't beat yourself down just learn! every night go home and write down as much as you can of what you did and could have done better. Then go out again and do it again only better.

    My sticking point is 3 second rule and little by little I'm getting better but the only way to do it is not giving up bro. Just suit up like batman and roll!

    Hope that helps!
    To my bros who served with me.
    "When it comes your time to die, be not like those whose hearts are filled with the fear of death, so that when their time comes they weep and pray for a little more time to live their lives over again in a different way. Sing your death song and die like a hero going home.


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