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  • 1 Post By whitedragon

Thread: Need Help Please - I want this one!!!

  1. #1
    tripsteady is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Exclamation Need Help Please - I want this one!!!

    Hey Guys

    No idea what to say , needs some help.

    Girl : Is an 8 , gets attention from guys , is DTF for the right guy and is very open about sexuality with about everyone. Also quite intelligent ...which is a major turn on.Also kinda a c*cktease maybe the kind that puts up major shit tests...not sure yet

    Pretense(3 weeks ago):

    Met her at a friends place , had some drinks with the whole group of them and had what I thought was an amazing conversation. was never just the two of us though...always the entire group. Entire conversation was sexualised.....but with everyone , so I think she is just an open person.

    Was extremely attracted to her , negged her quite a bit (saying her name doesnt suit her...neither does the sun glasses she wore)

    Got her number (which she gave to me , saying hey "dont think its going to be anything sexual", to which I replied .."ofcourse")

    Made sure I was cocky funny when dealing with her and throwing negs , so it didnt seem to harsh. Also displayed confidance and nonchalance...

    Middle Phase(last week) :
    Messaged her the next day saying something along the lines of "hey girl whose name doesnt suit her....had a good time last night should meet up again"

    She didnt reply. Added her on Facebook....she didnt accept friends request.I left it...withdrew friend request

    One of my friends that was there with me the first night got a message from her to come out about 2 weeks later. He went there thinking she liked him , she spent little time with him and hooked up with another random guy. She is kinda a cocktease it seems...On going there , she told him that she and her friend found me to be "pretentious" (confidence without reason). Not quite arrogant...but bordering on that line.

    Now(today) :
    Messaged her again saying :
    "Dont know whose number this is and YEAH i messaged YOU first but Id like to know who this is , before i remove this number from my phone "
    She replied back about an hour later saying " Its Rara , the girl whose name doesnt suit her"

    I replied back about 3 hours later saying "nah still dont recall....are you the girl whose sunglasses dont suit her either nah jokes ... Anywa my apologies if my demeanor came of a bit arrogant that nigh , wasnt my intention"

    She replies today(roughly 12 hours later) saying :
    "You didn't come off arrogant...Just a little....fucked. ha ha ha"


    I have no idea what to say. it seems like my cocky funny comes of as arrogant yet I dont want to seem like im working to hard to win her approval....yet I can see the interest just isnt there at this point.

    Advice on where to go from here?

  2. #2
    whitedragon is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Need Help Please - I want this one!!!

    I would suggest trying to build mystique, intrigue, attraction and being a bit more mature. Build up a little more about yourself than concentrating on knocking her down all the time or being the joker. Leap frog her so you are out of her league. Cocky funny will easily borderline into arrogance or childish attitude if overused. Maybe that's what she means by 'farked' she means it just wasn't interesting and it was childish. Don't be afraid to compliment a little. There are many ways into a girls pants. The trick is to gauge what they like and calibrate. Just because she is open doesn't mean she will flirt off with every cocky funny guy and in fact that might be exactly the line other confident guys approach her with. Be different, be exciting and still be a challenge for her.

    You have to attract her with an irresistable offer or adventure. No offense but you come across ambiguous when you write to a girl repeatedly negging her name and glasses but then sheepishly asking her out 'we should meet up again'. She doesn't really know what she is meeting up for and it comes across as unconfident. Make it bullet proof with 100% conviction. You already negged her name and glasses at the party, no need to do it again. Move forward. Had you simply texted 2-3 days later 'Hi Rara, nice meeting you the other night' she likely would have written back at least to touch base. You're betting on the probability she will say 'nice to meet you too', because you were positive, which then qualifies that she likes you at least a little. You're stating with 100% conviction that you enjoyed meeting her but not saying you desperately like her (which negging and apologizing for can). You're just knocking at the door wanting to be let in. Knock, don't bash the door.

    Then you could move to escalate the conversation forward and yourself upwards DHV in texts 'I'm trying to decide whether I should visit europe or australia next year (I am a hip adventurer)...have you ever been abroad? (want to come with me babe?)' or 'Im writing a new song on guitar (awesomeness)...its kind of funky (Stylish) but also has these melancholy minor chords (poetic, romantic, philosphical)...I gotta come up with a name for the song - any ideas?' (including her in your life) or straight up ask her out if you feel lucky 'Hey you like italian food? Let's grab a casual bite to eat down by the docks this week...I also know a bar adjacent that has a great jazz band and wine selection...it's mellow so it's a good place to chat'. Even if she says no, she is saying no to an attractive offer with an interesting guy. She will remember you by that. If she knows that is your date/life plan with her she knows that will be an attractive date/life plan with other girls and is forced to compete on a subliminal level. You're building yourself up. ie I know these cool places, I know my music, I know my food, I know my wine, I want to find out more about places to travel etc. So to get her interested you have to be an interesting guy. To be honest your negging, bothering her and apologizing is just not that interesting and AFC.

  3. #3
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    Autismus is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Need Help Please - I want this one!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by tripsteady View Post
    Hey Guys

    1 Girl : Is an 8 , gets attention from guys , is DTF for the right guy and is very open about sexuality with about everyone. Also quite intelligent ...which is a major turn on.Also kinda a c*cktease maybe the kind that puts up major sh1t tests...not sure yet




    Middle Phase(last week) :
    2 Messaged her the next day saying something along the lines of "hey girl whose name doesnt suit her....had a good time last night should meet up again"

    3 She didnt reply. Added her on Facebook....she didnt accept friends request.I left it...withdrew friend request

    4 One of my friends that was there with me the first night got a message from her to come out about 2 weeks later. He went there thinking she liked him , she spent little time with him and hooked up with another random guy. She is kinda a cocktease it seems...On going there , she told him that she and her friend found me to be "pretentious" (confidence without reason). Not quite arrogant...but bordering on that line.

    Now(today) :
    5 Messaged her again saying :
    "Dont know whose number this is and YEAH i messaged YOU first but Id like to know who this is , before i remove this number from my phone "
    She replied back about an hour later saying " Its Rara , the girl whose name doesnt suit her"

    6 I replied back about 3 hours later saying "nah still dont recall....are you the girl whose sunglasses dont suit her either nah jokes ... Anywa my apologies if my demeanor came of a bit arrogant that nigh , wasnt my intention"

    7 She replies today(roughly 12 hours later) saying :
    "You didn't come off arrogant...Just a little....farked. ha ha ha"

    8 I have no idea what to say. it seems like my cocky funny comes of as arrogant yet I dont want to seem like im working to hard to win her approval....yet I can see the interest just isnt there at this point.
    1 - every girl is DTF, you just gotta know what/how to do.

    2 - nice negging with an on-going thread, that was good, but don't suggest hanging out at ambiguous or undetermined times - implies that your actions depend upon external influences - not Alpha.

    3 - Ouch... walk it off champ, walk it off lol

    4 - She definitely friendzones guys and has no qualms about ditiching her "body guard" AFC friends to hook up. Also if she thinks you are confident beyond reason, then demonstrate the reasons for your confidence - DHV

    5 - "Dunno whose number... delete it from my phone." - solid frame. You are the desirable one with too many contacts to keep track of.

    6 - An apology can be really powerful if you have a dominant/honest/honorable frame, it can also be a DLV if her frame is more dominant - be careful with this one, her own frame seems VERY dominant

    7 - Again, if she thinks you were over-confident/just drunk then you need to raise your value (in her eyes) to the level of your displayed confidence. DHV and Neg her, also run some strong push-pull, she seemed to respond to that in the other text (focus more on the push than the pull. If you pull too much she will label you as AFC and will attemp to dominate you, but if you push too much then she will want to dominate you in defiance and will pull herself to you).

    8 - Tease her in a cocky/funny way and subtly DHV in the content of your teasing. Do not suggest that you two hang out - not yet - you need to build more attraction. Just tease her for her flaws (only the appropriately negable ones) for no other reason than because she has them and it's funny to you - because that's what she understands, because that's what she does with her AFC friends if I'm reading her correctly through this. Turn her into an AFC and tease her for your own amusement - this is your new frame.
    DTF HB's omw 2 LTR

  4. #4
    tripsteady is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Need Help Please - I want this one!!!

    wow , certainly did not expect SUCH detailed responses. My gratitude! some excellent advice in there...will follow the advice , let you guys know and write a field report.

    thanks again

  5. #5
    tripsteady is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Need Help Please - I want this one!!!

    ok before I do all this looking for a witty comeback to her message :

    "You didn't come off arrogant...Just a little....farked. ha ha ha"

    but nothing to harsh as she already sees me as "fucked"


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