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  • 1 Post By BatMan

Thread: Losing your wingman

  1. #1
    Lex S is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Losing your wingman

    A little backstory - I've got a good buddy, Jim, who I usually go out with once a week. He's a pretty damn good wingman, he's confident and we feed off each other's energy, and he has a girlfriend. This means that any girls we meet get passed on to me.....At least, most of them do.

    You see, even though Jim's been with his girl for a few years, he's had a real wandering eye, and in the past month he's been hooking up with other girls. Last week when I went out with him he made out with another girl at a bar. We went to the same bar tonight, and things were good. But less than 30 minutes into being there he met this 52 year old woman who wouldn't leave him alone. She made it obvious she wanted him, and he ended up hanging out with her the remainder of the night (Another 3 hours).

    This meant I was on my own. This bar basically turns into a dance floor after midnight. I do my fair share of dancing, but it's really awkward being there by myself. I try and meet people, both guys and girls, when I'm there, but tonight it was especially tough to even talk to people. So there I was, within shouting range of my friend, and he was ignoring me.

    My question is, what's the best way to deal with a wingman who's MIA in these situations? I'm pretty shy, and having someone with me helps get rid of some of it when it comes to meeting girls. I also felt really self-conscious being by myself the entire night - I felt like I was a friendless dope who was there by himself. I notice it's easier to meet people when you have other people with you.

  2. #2
    BatMan's Avatar
    BatMan is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Losing your wingman

    Yes I can understand how easy it is when you have someone with you. But why make it easy? Challenge yourself. Have fun with getting out of your comfort zone. Make it into a game. Work on being social before going after women. So just walk around complimenting everyone. Just spread good, positive feelings. If someone rejects you, there's something wrong with them so just shrug your shoulders and go to someone else.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

  3. #3
    Autismus's Avatar
    Autismus is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Losing your wingman

    Often when I sarge (whether alone or with a wing) I try to social butterfly, treating the people I "know" as landing stations. If I have a wing it's a lot easier because I know if I FTC and need to eject, I can just land back at my wing.

    But like BatMan said, without a wing it's a challenge and a challenge is good. Because instead of pulling an FTC and rolling off or ejecting, you still need a place to land, and that means opening a new set. (Just walk up and talk to a table, get them hooked, and sit down, the old set won't know you just met them - FTC, roll-off, open, lather rinse, repeat)

    Pretty soon you know the whole bar and your social proof is sky high to any late arrivals. But yeah, It's definitely waaay hard to always be ON like that, having an involved wing gives you a few moments of respite to recover yourself. Solo is like the lightning round...

    ...challenge accepted!
    DTF HB's omw 2 LTR

  4. #4
    Lex S is offline PUA in Training
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    Default Re: Losing your wingman

    That's true, the best way to learn is to get out of your comfort zone. I think my biggest problem last night was I really wasn't prepared to go solo. I figured Jim and I would hang all night, but instead I ended up dancing by myself waiting for him to either get shot down and come back, or leave with her. But either way, go him, he left with the woman and told me this morning that he got a BJ.

    On a side note, another thing that bugged me was he was going after a 52 year old woman. Keep in mind that Jim is 25 and in good shape. There's no reason why a woman that old WOULDN'T want to fuck him. She didn't really look her age, but she was nothing compared to the other girls there. I kept telling him he could do better, but I guess the prospect of definite sex with a woman who's past her prime was better than the prospect of getting shot down by a younger girl who looks much better.

  5. #5
    Autismus's Avatar
    Autismus is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Losing your wingman

    Yeah, bagging a cougar has the bucket list appeal
    DTF HB's omw 2 LTR

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Losing your wingman

    I was here months ago, check it out: http://www.puaforums.com/ask-expert/...-need-one.html
    ------------------------------------


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