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Thread: Need help to move relationship forward

  1. #1
    angel051 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Need help to move relationship forward

    So I've been with this girl for quite a while and I want to move the relationship to the next level. I'm not sure how to do so without messing up. Can anyone help?

  2. #2
    pua_wannabe is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Need help to move relationship forward

    Where are you at exactly? And how long is a while? Have feelings been express mutually?
    Take her off that farking pedestal!

    “The truth does not change according to our ability to stomach it.”
    ― Flannery O'Connor

  3. #3
    meteora's Avatar
    meteora is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Need help to move relationship forward

    i would use kino escalation if your thinkin about what i'm thinkin your meaning by "take things to the next level"
    try this if the link doesn't work you can look it up on youtube, its the vin dicarlo escalation ladder
    Vin DiCarlo PUA: The DiCarlo Escalation Ladder 1/5 - YouTube
    enjoy!!

  4. #4
    angel051 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Need help to move relationship forward

    Well we've been together for a couple years. Can't believe I even made it this far..
    And thanks Meteora. I'll check it out.

  5. #5
    whitedragon is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Need help to move relationship forward

    I am going on the assumption you are an intimate established couple. If you are friends and want to sleep with her you need to be clearer in your post.

    Here are a number of ways:
    Living together: Dependant on your age, if you ask a girl to move in with you that's pretty much taking it full steam to the next level. You will both work out very quickly of its meant to be or not haha.
    Discussions: 'Do you love me?'
    'We would have cute kids if we ever started a family'
    'if we bought a house together, what kind of place would be your dream castle?'
    Discussions about love/family/marriage basically to test her reaction. Surely she must be thinking about such things if you have been together a number of years?
    Gift: buy her a 'friendship ring or necklace' doesn't have to be expensive but will cost you, however it formalizes the relationship, girls obviously love jewelry and subtlely symbolizes other future ritual artifacts such as marriage rings. You're not pressuring her with marriage, just testing if you both see each other as that 'potential' and solidifying your monogamy.
    Deep romantic talk:
    'you know you are the only women in the world for me' this is better than 'I love you' in many ways. In all my years of experience girls really like to know they are your no.1, that you only have eyes for them (haha) and that they are the most beautiful woman in the world, to you.
    Jealousy: 'do you ever think about other guys?' don't say you like other girls, but you can admit 'sure I look at other girls, all men do and so do other women - I look at all interesting people - but you are the only one in my heart' (some touching crap).
    Possibility of leaving: 'you know I was offered a temporary position in Beijing/Caribbean (make it an exciting location you could be tempted away by lots of pretty girls) - I'm kind of considering it, but we would have to be apart for 6 months...' or 'if I had to travel away with work/study for a while could you handle being apart for so long?'. Something to test her reaction of longevity, on going companionship and the threat of it being broken by distance/time.

    My main concern with your position is that it is not HER trying to bring it to the next level. Usually it is girls who do all those sh1t tests or start talking about love, babies and marriage - so unless she has been doing that and you're missing the signals I would be considering (or telling us on the forum) what she has revealed to you or thinks of the relationship. Normally it is women who bring it to the next level and the man responds with verbal commitment, artifact commitment (jewelry etc) or legal (marriage).

  6. #6
    angel051 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Need help to move relationship forward

    Yes, we are an established couple. And thank you for your advice. I've done some of those already. And about those signals, she did talk about going to Hawaii and living together once we're married. I don't want to rush her or put her in a situation where she's uncomfortable. I also think being able to read her body language would help a ton but I myself don't really know how to.

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Need help to move relationship forward

    the best way to learn to read body language is to watch tv (romantic comedy works best) and pay close attention what the people who are in love with each other do while they talk to each other, watch for subtle or more obvious gestures, soon you should be able to tell what gestures the woman makes to show her interest (the movies make it obvious) once you have done this for a while, get out of the house, find a cute couple and "watch" them for a little while you will begin to understand the body language of ioi's and iod's just watch for them

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Need help to move relationship forward

    " i would marry you, but you don't seem to be into that"

    ^^^^ that cat string theory
    Men, we need to value our time more then we value women. This isn't to say women are not valuable. But who are we to believe in something so illogical, as men we should realize that without our time(life), we would not even be able to pursue women, but only our mother who gave us life. Why do we think we should prioritize them over our time(life) unless she is the one who gives me/my children life. Man is Sovereignty.

  9. #9
    whitedragon is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Need help to move relationship forward

    If she herself has raised living in Hawaii together when your married I'm not sure why you need to observe body language? if you want to move forward get down on your knees and propose. I'm not sure where the problem is here?

  10. #10
    angel051 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Need help to move relationship forward

    Because she still wants to have fun before closing the deal. I assume the Hawaii thing is like a vacation for her. I want to read body language so I can tell when she is not in the mood or if she's happy, that sort of thing. Then I would propose if I know she is happy and ready.


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