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  1. #1
    raids2 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Get a girl to sit under your arm, makeout

    As she is talking a lot, can I have some advice on good natural moves to get her in a position under my arm, and progress to make out. Something that happened on a date tonight. I would sit down, she sits down a person width away or I'm sitting in an inviting position she continues talking to me standing. I almost said "sit down" tapping the bench seat next to me, but didn't. I know this happens, so what's a smooth way to deal. Location is park. I know for a fact she likes me... this alone didn't do the trick tho, and she kept her physical distance, but telling me she likes me.

  2. #2
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    Autismus is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: Get a girl to sit under your arm, makeout

    When it comes to physical anything, girls will stay within their comfort zone. If she's comfortable under your arm - she'll go there. If she's comfortable sitting a person-space away and no closer - she'll stay there. If she has to keep a table or purse between the two of you - she will. If she isn't comfortable getting close then that means that your job is to focus on getting comfortable. In addition to generally building comfort, you can do a few other things:

    First be animated when you talk. Gesture with your hands, turn in multiple directions. Keep it controlled tho, don't be spastic, just be high-energy and expressive.

    Secondly - in your gestures and animatedness - encroach upon her "personal bubble" (which will make her comfortable with your proximity) and mix those moments of encroachment with moments of removing yourself from her proximity (this will make her chase).

    Gesture in her direction when asking her opinion or when describing a feeling, then lean away to retrieve your drink, then touching her arm when you make a point, then turn away as you narrate your own thoughts reflectively... then turn back to her.

    Essentially what this is is taking her comfort zone, reducing the distance between you to the edge of her comfort zone (thus expanding the comfort zone nearer to her) and then moving away. Two steps forward, one step back. Repeat this often and she'll slide right into you... then you can return the favor
    DTF HB's omw 2 LTR

  3. #3
    whitedragon is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Get a girl to sit under your arm, makeout

    I let them sit down first (courtesy) and then sit right beside them and put my arm around them. I will perhaps start playing with their hair or gently massaging their back shoulders. Or I lean in to kiss them. I usually only do an arm around right before a kiss close but mostly I think I just kiss and then we wrap into each other. If you are out at night, if a girl allows your arm around them they will probably allow you to kiss them so you may as well go for that and savour having a cute girl in your arms afterwards. If it's a day date I might hug a girl goodbye in a way that is intimate and I can gauge her reaction so next date the gates are open for complete physical intimacy if it's a positive reaction.

  4. #4
    raids2 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Get a girl to sit under your arm, makeout

    Autismus, thanks, however I was actually being animated and encroaching into her bubble of comfort. Her reaction was good whenever I made physical contact, she would get "giddy" in a way. You are right that she stayed in her place of comfort: I noticed that as I moved half a foot towards her, she moved the EQUAL space away, in the span of our time together.

    Whitedragon, it was letting myself sit first which was the cause of this issue. Simple as that. Because I came off as being confident, I could have pulled this off, and been in a comfortable space for a kiss like you said, as well as a flowing physical touch.


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