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Thread: I seem to lack interesting things to talk about with women

  1. #1
    Blistex is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default I seem to lack interesting things to talk about with women

    I have not really posted on here for advice in the past few months. I haven't read much PUA material, I have just been going out and meeting people, building a social life and of course working on my game every chance I get. I read a post earlier about how its fun to blow yourself out sometimes just to see how it works out, its so true with the exception of the not getting laid part. I have been working on my clothing (accessories are where its at), physical appearance and frame.

    Now I regularly text women, I have a few that actually pursue me, which I usually use as social pivots to get into parties with lots of girls and what not.

    I don't have much of a problem opening or approaching or anything, but what I lack are three things.

    1. Interest - I find it difficult to find a woman I share any common interests in...this leads to me just having to lead and almost force the conversation sometimes. I have gotten good at hiding it, but its still uncomfortable. This leads me to believe that I need to find a way to have more value raising conversation material for better fluff

    2. I get self conscious most of the time, especially with the more attractive women because most of the women I pull aren't that great looking. They pick up on this. I am still finding it hard to be comfortable around them. This is when we are doing things together, not the initial pickup.

    3. Where can I find new daily material and fluff that most women will be interested in talking about. Funny stories would be great too as humor is one of my main assets and is my primary weapon to drop a bitch shield.

    I have some more areas I need mad work on, but these are my main sticking points making dates and activities with women fairly difficult.

  2. #2
    T-Mal's Avatar
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    Default Re: I seem to lack interesting things to talk about with women

    That's the thing...

    In the very beginning you don't want to be trying to find interesting things to talk about, or start looking for common interests.

    That's the rapport stage, and you want to stay away from that until you've built attraction first.

    It doesn't matter what you say, or what she says in the very beginning...
    What DOES matter is your body language & projecting fun & confidence.

    That's why some guys are able to pick up foreign girls who don't even speak the same language... Because they're not trying to have a "conversation" with them; They're just being fun & flirty.



    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  3. #3
    Tanktop is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: I seem to lack interesting things to talk about with women

    Quote Originally Posted by Blistex View Post



    2. I get self conscious most of the time, especially with the more attractive women because most of the women I pull aren't that great looking. They pick up on this. I am still finding it hard to be comfortable around them. This is when we are doing things together, not the initial pickup.



    I have some more areas I need mad work on, but these are my main sticking points making dates and activities with women fairly difficult.

    They have no idea how attractive the women you pull are. This may be one thing you really need to address within yourself my man. You could be sabotaging your own game due to the thoughts you create in your head.

    Think for example:
    If a girl who thinks she is chubby and has self essteeem issues about it normally says something like "omg im so chubby eww i hate my love handles" the girl may not even be fat. You may think she is perfect and looks great the way she is. But her self thoughts is the image she portrays herself as and it reflects in her actions.

    food for thought

  4. #4
    Blistex is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: I seem to lack interesting things to talk about with women

    T-Mal - Well my main issue here I guess tends to be sometimes I freeze up, or I get to talking to the girl and find myself stuck, no understanding the social constructs I should follow. It causes some discomfort within me that women easily pick up on (I also think this tends to be an underlying cause of a lot of flakes I experience)

    Tanktop- I'm glad you spotted this. Its been an issue I have been trying to work on for a while now. I have an underlying lack of self esteem. I get a lot of validation from others (of course I don't fish for compliments) but it tends to show itself at the wrong times, especially under social pressure.

    I have really been doing two things to help with my situation - I pretty much act like I don't care, which goes too far at times as women have wanted to come spend time with me, but have told me they feel like it doesn't matter to me if they show up or not (and tbh a lot of the time i really don't care all that much). I'll find a balance with this one of these days I suppose.

    The other is that if I am in a situation and it feels scary or makes me a bit nervous, I don't back out I do it, hell I'll even be the first sometimes. This little philosophy has helped me tremendously.

    Both pieces of advice seem rock solid, and I'll surely use their foresight

  5. #5
    Tanktop is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: I seem to lack interesting things to talk about with women

    Quote Originally Posted by Blistex View Post
    T-Mal -

    The other is that if I am in a situation and it feels scary or makes me a bit nervous, I don't back out I do it, hell I'll even be the first sometimes. This little philosophy has helped me tremendously.

    Both pieces of advice seem rock solid, and I'll surely use their foresight

    Well this is a good trait to have that will speed up your game 10x faster.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: I seem to lack interesting things to talk about with women

    Just work on attraction first.
    (Body language & flirting... think "fun")

    THEN, when it's time for the rapport stage, SHE will be more likely to carry the conversation a bit more.... or at least bring up more interesting subjects.

    Here's all you really need to do in the beginning of THAT phase: When she mentions something, ask questions like "How does that make you feel?"
    or
    "Interesting.. what did you think about that?"

    or make comments like "I can just imagine how that must make you feel"

    Those are a couple little "secret magic words" with women (Think & Feel)
    When you employ those in conversation, it affects them on a more emotional level & makes her open up more.



    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  7. #7
    daltonbrayall is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: I seem to lack interesting things to talk about with women

    I know people are gonna rip into me for this, especially linking Haha but there is one great way to find things to talk about with women and this is my advice to you, subscribe to Cosmo. Its like having the other teams playbook Haha, saw it on a TV show and no joke dude, if you wanna usb things to talk to girls about, memorize one page of a magazine and you will be set hahaha
    If i get a guy some a$$, he gets it for a day; if i teach him how to get it for himself, he's tappin forever

  8. #8
    Tanktop is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: I seem to lack interesting things to talk about with women

    Quote Originally Posted by daltonbrayall View Post
    I know people are gonna rip into me for this, especially linking Haha but there is one great way to find things to talk about with women and this is my advice to you, subscribe to Cosmo. Its like having the other teams playbook Haha, saw it on a TV show and no joke dude, if you wanna usb things to talk to girls about, memorize one page of a magazine and you will be set hahaha

    if i am at a doctors apt or sitting in a hair salon i always read this ish

  9. #9
    daltonbrayall is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: I seem to lack interesting things to talk about with women

    Ya know it really isn't a bad thing to do, gets some conversation starters and some openers if you can manage it
    If i get a guy some a$$, he gets it for a day; if i teach him how to get it for himself, he's tappin forever

  10. #10
    linking is offline Banned
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    Default Re: I seem to lack interesting things to talk about with women

    I'm going to rip into you just to fulfill your expectations dalton you benderrrrr much love tho dude

    Linking x


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