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Thread: RB Rant About Getting Your Ex Back Posts!

  1. #21
    RJP3030 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: RB Rant About Getting Your Ex Back Posts!

    Don't get me wrong, hurts like hell...esp when they go back to their ex of 9 years they left in the first place for you. Thankfully I became unplugged and prolly made it last longer than it shouldve given my disgusting oneitis....Bottom line, you gotta ask yerself why you are so desperate to be with someone that has made clear they dont want the same. Self-respect has to come first, there are too many better girls.

    Good luck to anyone thats in it, but I agree stop asking the same question that people have answered countless times. You'll miss out on a better girl because you're so hung up on her.

  2. #22
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    Default Re: RB Rant About Getting Your Ex Back Posts!

    I understand what you mean about the Get Your Ex Back threads. I have to constantly remind myself that I have been there before and how I would want someone to talk to me. It helps me from ripping my hair out, because the truth is that they DON'T know how often we get the same questions. Their perception of reality is very different from ours. This is why the public doesn't understand why some celebrities just don't want to sign autographs.

    I also remind myself what David DeAngelo says about "saving your girlfriend from herself." To which he says that you are "robbing her of her maturing process." So yeah, I tell them what they want to hear because they have to learn eventually, but on their own. No one can convince them to quit trying unless they want to. It's just too easy to tell them to get over it and bang 10 other girls so I try to tell them something else that gives them a little hope...unless there's no way to salvage it. But I'm pretty stubborn enough to think that there's always a way to get them back :P Nonetheless they still have to go through the motions of grieving because it's not like if your loved one passed away (extreme example alert) that if someone said to get over it, that it would be that simple. A break up is a process. A process that we have covered too many times on here

    P.S. Another reason why I respond to them is because I don't know where the links are lol.
    "All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth."

  3. #23
    gringoverde2 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: RB Rant About Getting Your Ex Back Posts!

    Great addition to the discussion, Batman. I think that you capture the emotion of the situation really well. Sometimes the best help that they need is to hear: "Improve yourself in order to get her back." I've seen guys go on one month binges of personal improvement with the sole motivation of winning back (or keeping) the gal that they like. What is so wrong with one-itis and actually developing feelings for a gal? We are biologically programed to form attachment, so it don't make sense to walk away without at least making some efforts. (No saying the posters would know the first thing about when to call it quits, but for those of us who've studied we know when to keep trying) I know that I've been there feeling wrecked because of a heartbreak. I had to keep telling myself to either better myself to get her back or to sincerely believe that "the best revenge is living well." Seeing as we are discussing pet-peeves, I gotta say that really long field reports and worse still really long questions bother me. You should be able to say whatever you are thinking concisely and fill it in with either insights or questions.

  4. #24
    Blistex is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: RB Rant About Getting Your Ex Back Posts!

    Well, I'm sure a lot of you guys have saw some of my first posts, can be pathetic at times. I spent a couple months keeping myself away from women, I ended all of my casual relationships, and it worked out well. I got my reflection I needed, and a break from women in general.

    That being said...looking at my old posts I see how much I have improved. That alone helped get me out of a slump I was in. These people surely need help. That being said I agree with most they aren't willing to listen. They want to believe what "she" told them instead of exmining theirself for truth.

    I was introduced to pickup and had some of the same illusions. Now I find myself enjoying the adventure and not asking so many questions. Girls no longer find me creepy. I actually have fun conversation and enjoy myself around women.

    Now to sum up this post...

    These people may or may not listen, and need as much help as the next guy, but what is needed is a unified thread on the subject, and I feel it should include the following info at a minimum:

    Why your ex and you split - for whatever reason the attraction died, you both became unhappy

    Do you REALLY want her back?

    And a few of my favorite two pieces of wisdom:

    You are in my life because I want you to be, not because I need you to be.

    When it's truly over, you know it. Its simply your choice to accept it or not.

    Hey, sometimes getting back with your ex might be the best call...but by not doing it right you may just loose her forever. I think I'm done rambling now.

  5. #25
    The Red Baron's Avatar
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    Default Re: RB Rant About Getting Your Ex Back Posts!

    My frustration is that people want a magical answe and that doesn't exist, it's about an inner transformation to be stronger and better

    But here, I posted my guide to one-itis and what to do

    RB - so you want your ex back
    Never need praise, sympathy, or approval



  6. #26
    gringoverde2 is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: RB Rant About Getting Your Ex Back Posts!

    It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken: The Smart Girl's Break-Up Buddy by Greg Behrendt. I know that we generally as a Community avoid these sort of mainstream advice book, but I think that Greg Behrendt has some really good insights into relationships. He's really candid, thus writing "He's Just Not That Into You." It'd be great to see some more well-written candid books on relationships for guys. I went to the bookstore and found one tenths as many books for guys as there were for women. Not to mention, the writing quality of the e-books looks like someone copied a pasted their latest forum postings without editing. Maybe we just need to move away from the self-publishing? Haha. I think there is definitely a hunger for some more mainstream writing in the Style of Neil Strauss to discuss issues like one-itis in a truly candid manner. As far as the choice to accept it's over goes, I was really happy when I realized that I could choose to be miserable after a break-up and give myself permission to spend a week or so in that state before returning to normalcy.

  7. #27
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    Default Re: RB Rant About Getting Your Ex Back Posts!

    Cody, RB & Myself Have done One, How many do we have to do?
    Men, we need to value our time more then we value women. This isn't to say women are not valuable. But who are we to believe in something so illogical, as men we should realize that without our time(life), we would not even be able to pursue women, but only our mother who gave us life. Why do we think we should prioritize them over our time(life) unless she is the one who gives me/my children life. Man is Sovereignty.

  8. #28
    dgmortal is offline PUA All Star
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    Default Re: RB Rant About Getting Your Ex Back Posts!

    I don't think this thread is gonna stop any new commer to avoid posting an Ex Back post, they are in a highly emotionally charge state and are desperate for any help they can get, most of them even post their problem to multiple forums. and usually they disappear from community when they are over their break up or when they find a new girl to cling to.
    If it frightens you, Do It!

  9. #29
    xavier's Avatar
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    Default Re: RB Rant About Getting Your Ex Back Posts!

    Hey what about those threads titled:
    -where did go wrong?
    -what should i do?
    -N-close but flake
    -texting she didn't reply
    -critique my text
    -how to get her on a date?
    .................... ..... The list goes on and on abotu the same damn uninteresting easiest things
    "The world will never change much less become what you want it to be. The only thing that can change is you. Face your fears, grow stronger and become what you want to be."
    _Xavier.

  10. #30
    The Red Baron's Avatar
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    Default Re: RB Rant About Getting Your Ex Back Posts!

    This wasn't actually supposed to stop it, I just wanted to bit*h a little bit lol
    Never need praise, sympathy, or approval




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