Aight...lemme just say...I've been having girl trouble with one girl in particular for over 3 years now and after finding this forum existed and reading like two threads and the responses I totally get it now, and yet for three years...I completely utterly and very blatantly did NOT get it.
Here's whats happening:
The girl is bat sh1t crazy, but I seriously am in love with her and let's just say when she's at the proper weight...there is NO hotter girl existing, literally not joking, just blow your mind sexy this one is...
So we met 3 years back when we both attended the same college. At first it was just me who liked her and honestly felt bad for her because the night we met somehow I ended up with her number when her friends and her dropped me off at my place and then they got pulled over otw home and she got a DUI. I was already dealing with a DUI at the time so I felt awful and took it upon myself to reach out to her and offer some help just seeing her through the chaos that was about to ensue.
That eventually led to us realizing we had a huge lecture class together, then us sitting next to each other everyday and then starting to text nonstop all day everyday. I came off desperate somewhere because eventually she was disinterested. How do I know? Because, nowadays I'm like her long distance bf-ish, and back then she would give me mad signs but then one day she pulled the "I have a long distance thing atm and I just wanna be your friend is all." Yet in the past three years now that I know her way better I can safely say that she did have that BF but she is the type who wouldve gave it up had I played my cards right because she got involved with plenty of guys while we kept in touch after she moved away to the next town over.
Each time she found someone she'd stop talking to me or turn into a One-Worder and completely stop reciprocating anything about missing each other. Well the first time I played it stupid and somehow she came running back, but it was clearly just a rebound thing, which thankfully gave me a second chance. The second time though she was sending me risque pics about two weeks out from her having a mental breakdown going to a hospital for a week and then suddenly engaging another guy. Here's the thing...I know all this from her FB page, and we've never discussed that guy or the engagement to this day she pretty much thinks I had no idea.
Well needless to say she went silent for a bit there but as soon as that all got farked up (she was banging hot at the time and clearly just was craving nonstop sex and this guy had money, and was taking her to cali and sh1t so how could she say no), she came running back again, but this ime with some serious depression. About a year later now shes fat as a cow, and complains about it constantly and is always displaying her terrible self esteem issues to me fishing for compliments or some sort of support. Sadly Im excellent at delivering it. You'd think I work for farking Fed-Ex.
sh1t this is long now okay HERE'S THE TLDR:
Bitch is mental
So am I so I love the sh1t out of her
She went through a few guys (and an engagement) after moving away but finally admitted to having a thing for me and wanting to stay in touch and see what we could make of our blatant obsession for one another.
After the engagement nonsense (1yr ago) we met a few times...
December: made out on sight of each other. Never kissed her or even attempted to before (though we did discuss some sexual tension here and there)
July: she mustve been in touch with engagement boy because she went a bit silent and somehow (huge mistake here) sending flowers worked wonders, got a date out of it and some more tongue action. NOTE: she was hot as hell in december and by that july she was beyond "let herself go" status.
August: things were great, lots of great convos, got another date and some more tongue - she'd lost a tinyyy bit of weight from before.
Sept: same report as august and a little more weight loss again.
Oct: she been trying to get back to the 10 she used to be and going hard at it too so its bound to happen (ive seen her get this far lost and make it back somehow before). Shes starting to seem disinterested again...convos falling off not much to talk about, keeps pushing aside my attempts at a date EVERY WEEK (again huge mistake) for things like football games with her boss and coworkers that apparentlt I cant join in on?
Oh and another thing...awkward moment to start the date in sept...her dad pulls up as im getting out to greet/kiss her, weird peck kiss went down and then she yelled to her dad "im just hanging with a friend" when she was getting in the car.
fark this is so long no wonder im even in this situation in the first place...
Seriously tho HERES THE REAL QUESTION:
I decided to play the ignore game over this weekend...i didnt do sh1t i was busy but she texted me finally yesterday...three texts:
"slyboots*....di d something happen to your phone??"
"are you ignoring me on purpose... :/"
Then again this morning:
What do I do considering I unbelievably foolishly sent her a love letter that will arrive tomorrow to her saying i lost my phone and ive been thinking of her and care about her so much and blah blah blah and that when I get y phone back from asking my friend to ask HER friend to see if SHE has it that ill text her for sure.
I think that its a good thing I made it seem like my phone was a) lost b) in possession of a girl whos a friend of friend that is also a girl.
Also Im moving in with 2 complete strangers in a few weeks, both girls ...a rash decision in lue of me thinking she qas going to be disinterested for good this time ( i wanted to change my life a bit and just meet some new women..what better way than to live with two decent looking college girls).
What I would like to know is, how do I keep her wanting to prove herself to me now that Ive f'd up and sent that letter just when I had her worrying and thinking she messed something up?
Im sick of not beig able to see her when she knows damn well and even admits to having a boring life and doesnt do sh1t besides work then watch tv with her bro and sis in law and get fatter, yet somehow every week theres enough for her to do on the weekend to avoid me being able to come see her.
I want it so shes texting me almost every saturday or sunday morning saying please come see me today I want you here right now.
I almost had control again but I sent that mushy letter today and now shes going to feel like she was silly for ever thinking she wasnt in control anymore which she clearly doubted for a bit in the past few days.
What to doooo? Keep in mind I actually do want to be with this girl in the future and see her through her depression and weight issues and hopefully find a way to get her to either come stay with me for a night or us rent a room up there or something because the tension has become too much, everytime it gets close to that I mess it up and she kind of pushes away but she even says herself she knows alot would go down if we had an evening alone.
How do I get that to happen?
And if you read all this you are a god amongst impatient unfriendly internet users, thanks for any help ciaooo