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Thread: RB - Female Guide to pickup?

  1. #1
    The Red Baron's Avatar
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    Question RB - Female Guide to pickup?

    So a female friend of mine wants me to help her on her game. 95% of what I've learned is from the male perspective. I'd like to pull together something like a female introduction to game and how to pick up guys, and I'd like your thoughts as guys who understand the pickup process. She is part of the community of PUAs here but relatively inexperienced still

    She's a cute girl but not from here, somewhat conservative atmosphere but really nice

    After some though this is what I emailed her. (oh - when I reference the "game day", that was a big event we had for the PUA community where we trained on a few topics then used them in the field)


    (My email)

    "Right now these are thoughts, I've been brainstorming a bit but I think it's in the right direction

    So, game is definitely different for a girl than a guy.

    You really don't have to open with anything more than "Hi, how are you doing today?"
    Guys will be receptive and friendly to you saying hello. After that we can talk about the elements of game you can incorporate -

    First and foremost, a girl needs to understand how to flirt. The IOIs I talked briefly on at our game day are applicable here. As PUAs we learn to look for IOIs as a sign a girl is interested in us. You can take this and use them intentionally as a way to flirt with a guy. Here's an excerpt of examples I look for, taken from my notes from the game day

    They hold their gaze
    They look back a few seconds after they look away
    Watch their shoulders and which way they point (from center of chest)
    Preening (personal grooming, fixing your clothes, etc) = interest
    Licking lips
    Sitting forward*/ leaning closer to you
    Any proximity
    They touch you

    They ask questions
    Any question that begins with So. (shows an effort to continue the conversation)
    They ask your name
    Laughs at vague jokes
    She gives you a nickname
    She introduces you
    You catch sideways glances (like youre not supposed to see)


    Ok on a related note, you can always use your body language to come across more confident and more attractive. Stand up straight, smile, head up.
    Smiling is always important.

    A girl wants to give the impression she is hard to get, like "high value", but be friendly and flirtatious. Then when you show IOIs to your target they will be much more interested because you are showing them interest even though you are high value and could choose many other people

    Also important to this is the idea of Kino - aka touch. Use it liberally, it makes you more friendly and makes people interested in you. Here's a link to a guide I posted on it, this would be vital to female game
    http://www.puaforums.com/how-pick-up...html#post63332

    Ok, now back to the idea of a girl being high value. One of the things us guys do is to "qualify" a girl, this, in a sense is to show we are actually trying to find a valuable target with something going for her, or a target that possesses certain traits we look for. This separates us from every other guy hitting on a girl just because she is pretty. As a girl, you can use this wonderfully. If you set a bar for a guy, he will try to meet your standards. Here's another guide I posted about using qualifiers.
    http://www.puaforums.com/how-pick-up...html#post61758

    Both of these guides are written to guys, but the concepts discussed in them should be pretty adaptable for you.

    Take a look over this and we can talk about your thoughts on them or any other questions tomorrow, and more this weekend if you want to talk one on one

    So for now,as best I can summarize a "girls starter guide" to PUA

    Learn how to deliberately use your flirting, including body language and eye contact to your advantage

    Use kino!

    Qualify a guy

    Oh and a final note - everything I discussed on peacock applies to a girl too. Actually easier, you can wear what you want to get noticed. You will get noticed and no one ever second guesses it for a girl, you have much more liberal fashion standards

    - RB"



    So 2 questions-

    first, what would you guys change, what do you like / not like, think works / doesn't, agree with / disagree

    Second - how can I teach her to flirt better? She asked in a follow up and I told her to work on kino, laughing and smiling, and using open receptive body language

    But I feel like I should offer much better advice, just not sure how yet
    Never need praise, sympathy, or approval



  2. #2
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    Default Re: RB - Female Guide to pickup?

    I would reassure & remind her of one important fact about men, which might help put her at ease....

    Men are simple creatures.

    All it takes to get a guy's interest is a smile, & her batting her eyelashes.

    Let her know that guys are VERY receptive to being touched, and will not be offended or creeped out by it.

    It sounds like she really just needs to work on her own confidence... because the guys will take care of the rest of the "pick up"



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  3. #3
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    Default Re: RB - Female Guide to pickup?

    I completely agree with T-Mal here. Does Female PU even really exist? Haha. But any guy with the slightest bit of knowledge about social dynamics knows that when you make eye contact with a girl and she smiles that it's a HUGE IOI. That should be all she needs to do. If more needs to be done, it's not too much. Go as direct as she wants, I know that if a girl came up to me and said "Hey, you're really cute/hot/sexy. What's your name?" I'd be very receptive to it (Wouldn't it be nice if it were that easy for us?). After that it's just a matter of kino and qualifying herself (which isn't that hard to do to an AFC).

    Anyways, what you've told her I think is more than enough. PU is very simple for girls, not nearly as in depth as we've dove for men.

    For tips on flirting, I'd just say smile/laugh, touch his arm, etc. like you've said. Not really sure how to "teach" someone to flirt, that's more something you either know or don't know I feel..
    DOOOOONNNN'TTTT CAAAARREEEEE

    You are the prize. She needs to earn it.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: RB - Female Guide to pickup?

    i actualy had the thought that alot of the stuff we do to attract girls, girls use to attract us, girls and guys both do the same things to attract each other here are just a few of the similarity's i've seen
    1. both used body language to show interest and to show confidence
    2. girls peacock just like we do (except they almost always peacock with all their jewelry)
    3. we all dress to empress (we can make ourselves significantly more attractive by the way we dress)
    4.we both use ioi's to show interest in each other
    5. both sexes use neggs to lower each others status
    6. both guys and girls use push pull to create strong emotional connections
    7. girls can use kiss gambits too
    8.both sexes use kino
    9.girls can make approaches too (i have had girls try to game me with more than just walking up and saying hi)
    10. both have to build a level of comfort with each other in order to escalate
    11. girls can use jealousy plotlines too
    12. both sexes play hard to get

    the list goes on and on, i think that girls can use mystery methode on guys too, everything that aplies to girls, pretty much applies to them gaming us. at heart we men are emotional beings just like wemon, the only difference is that wemon are more expressive of their emotions, and that us men have more pride

  5. #5
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    Default Re: RB - Female Guide to pickup?

    "For tips on flirting, I'd just say smile/laugh, touch his arm, etc. like you've said. Not really sure how to "teach" someone to flirt, that's more something you either know or don't know I feel.."

    flirting is definately something that is learned, just some people learned it when they were younger than others, i must say that i had to figure out how to flirt, it wasn't realy an ability i was born with, i just mimiced guys who were good at flirting and learned how to flirt with girls and i'm still learning to be better at flirting

  6. #6
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    Default Re: RB - Female Guide to pickup?

    I guess I was just lucky with the flirting and was born with it/learned it early on
    DOOOOONNNN'TTTT CAAAARREEEEE

    You are the prize. She needs to earn it.

  7. #7
    daltonbrayall is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: RB - Female Guide to pickup?

    Yeah I'm reading this with my female wing right now, who to be fair is a better pua than I am, and she agrees with you as do I. Thats why I get so irritated that girls hate pickup artists. Why? Yourmad we use the tricks you use to fuck with us in relationships, when we use it to sleep with you? Who is she to tell me which of us is wrong?
    If i get a guy some a$$, he gets it for a day; if i teach him how to get it for himself, he's tappin forever

  8. #8
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    Default Re: RB - Female Guide to pickup?

    My Fiancee thinks it's awesome that I know how to make her feel the emotional highs, & that I constantly do the things that make her more & more attracted to me.

    Understanding the psychological aspect of relationships is extremely beneficial.
    Because, when you understand WHY things happen, it makes it easier to know HOW to make them happen.

    And she doesn't care where I learned the principles & techniques from.... she's just happy that I DID.



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  9. #9
    The Red Baron's Avatar
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    Default Re: RB - Female Guide to pickup?

    Seriously I tell anyone who asks that I've read up on and work with a group of guys who practice social skills, how to talk to girls, how to approach, etc.
    Never have any qualms about it, once in a while a girl will call us out on an opener and I use it as an opportunity to talk and get her feedback on how we did and should approach, what we should say, etc. actually works great. (hey maybe there's an opinion opener there - hey my friend and I were discussing what to say when you approach a girl....x". Lol)

    But to all of you guys great feedback, much appreciated. You've given me a few things to think about with this. She's coming out tonight so her and I will discuss this more. I'll see what questions she has about it and take your tips and see how I can develop this further

    I'm actually interested cuz I know more than 1 girl who has asked and I want to be able to help them

    Again all your advice is much appreciated
    Never need praise, sympathy, or approval



  10. #10
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    Default Re: RB - Female Guide to pickup?

    That WOULD be a great opener...

    "Heya tiger baby! I was just wondering what the most effective way to seduce you might be....? Any help is greatly appreciated."



    LOL!


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