Top 10 Stats
Latest Posts Loading... Loading...
Loading...
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Loading...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Page 2 of 3 FirstFirst 123 LastLast
Results 11 to 20 of 27
Like Tree8Likes

Thread: Girl loves romance novels but claims she's not romantic .. what gives?

  1. #11
    Skyper is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 94, Level: 1
    Level completed: 88%, Points required for next Level: 6
    Overall activity: 9.1%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Posts
    22
    Points
    94
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    10

    Default Re: Girl loves romance novels but claims she's not romantic .. what gives?

    Meteora .. not to brag but, I'm already solid when it comes to conversation .. thing is, I've never paid close attention to directing it or using subtleties to ramp up attraction, etc. I think it mostly fell flat .. got her laughing and feeling good .. but then nothing and it left me in the friends area. I mean, she's told her friends that we have so much fun together .. she's never bored with me and always laughing, etc. Again, need to direct the tone, etc. away from friends to .. more.

    Thanks for the reference, btw .. I'll check it out.

  2. #12
    Blistex is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
    Points: 4,497, Level: 42
    Level completed: 74%, Points required for next Level: 53
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    1000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Location
    Back for a limited time.
    Posts
    437
    Points
    4,497
    Level
    42
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    207

    Default Re: Girl loves romance novels but claims she's not romantic .. what gives?

    I would like to comment on a couple things.

    First is you said "I am not in a hurry to find a woman, and I don't need one to be happy". - that is great shit man, a good attitude to have, though sometimes most of us need a reminder. PUAs say they don't need a woman to be happy, but they need WOMEN to be happy...we all need companionship and grow cold without it. (please don't mistake that observation for me saying that its not a true statement)

    The second is "I have not read enough to give her that kind of ultimatum". I assume you are reading the books to her? If you are referring to how much knowledge you have gained due to your PUA reading, well that is whoopy cock. Reading more material surely helps, but is never necessary. At some point though, it may be in your best interest to end this relationship, whatever it is. It seems to me you aren't gaming her, you are falling for her. You could be setting yourself up for heartbreak friend.

  3. #13
    Skyper is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 94, Level: 1
    Level completed: 88%, Points required for next Level: 6
    Overall activity: 9.1%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Posts
    22
    Points
    94
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    10

    Default Re: Girl loves romance novels but claims she's not romantic .. what gives?

    Hey .. I actually mistyped that .. reading comment. I meant I haven't read enough signals from her that I should give the ultimatum/move on, etc. I'm not reading stuff to her either .. it just comes up naturally .. if you're talking about romance type stuff, that shit just comes naturally .. I just open my mouth and it comes out. Lol!

    But you're right though .. I'm not gaming her .. she's not a game to me .. she's really cool and, yeah .. you could say I'm falling for her. Could lead to heartbreak too but, so what? There's risk in everything.

  4. #14
    Skyper is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 94, Level: 1
    Level completed: 88%, Points required for next Level: 6
    Overall activity: 9.1%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Posts
    22
    Points
    94
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    10

    Default Re: Girl loves romance novels but claims she's not romantic .. what gives?

    Just got an email back from a buddy of mine .. I gave him the jist of the convo and his response was, "Well, my gut instinct is she is just blocking your advances...of course all women would like romance, but I think she has to get used to you - her friend who has tried to be romantic and she has stopped - being the person making the advances. I think everything else is just a smokescreen."

    So yeah .. I'll just continue what I'm doing, subtly escalating along the way. The way I see it .. it could ultimately become a matter of, she has felt everything for me except that deep, gut level attraction because I haven't given her what she desires, emotionally. And now that I'm starting to, it's weird for her and has disrupted this picture she has of me. So .. I'll just have to go in and do a little erasing here, add a little over here and, we'll see. Our relationship kinda, "peaked" during the time when she freaked out over not hearing from me for a few days, having that surprising fear that something had happened to me, that she might not see me again, etc. But then it went flat cause I didn't know how to capitalize on it and carry that momentum. So, gotta build back to that.

  5. #15
    meteora's Avatar
    meteora is offline PUA All Star
    Points: 14,800, Level: 78
    Level completed: 88%, Points required for next Level: 50
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    Social10000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Location
    west virginia
    Posts
    1,667
    Points
    14,800
    Level
    78
    Thanks
    11
    Thanked 20 Times in 17 Posts
    Rep Power
    685

    Default Re: Girl loves romance novels but claims she's not romantic .. what gives?

    weather you get anywhere with her or not, you will learn alot from this and be able to deal with it better next time. you could try switching over to a more "direct" game, get her in a realy good mood and then when the two of you are realy close and isolated whisper the phrase "i want you" in her ear weather she acknoledges it or not, it literally can make girls wet their panties. go for the kiss right afterwards. it will be very direct and confident, not to mention high risk/ high reward

  6. #16
    T-Mal's Avatar
    T-Mal is offline PUA All Star
    Points: 31,222, Level: 100
    Level completed: 0%, Points required for next Level: 0
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    Social25000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Awards:
    Posting Award
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Location
    Southern Michigan USA
    Posts
    2,558
    Points
    31,222
    Level
    100
    Thanks
    3
    Thanked 9 Times in 8 Posts
    Rep Power
    1391

    Default Re: Girl loves romance novels but claims she's not romantic .. what gives?

    All women define "romance" differently...
    For some it's flowers & love notes.

    For others, it's having someone make them feel safe & secure.

    Some of them also see "romance" as being appreciated & wanting to know their partner is thinking about them.

    Whatever it happens to be, the key point is that those things will flip her emotional triggers.

    Like Cody mentioned earlier: it's not about what a girls "SAYS"... but rather, what she MEANS.

    That's where things can get tricky. You have to pay attention to her body language & reactions, in order to know what's working & what isn't. (As well as, whether or not you're interpreting her meanings correctly.)


    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  7. #17
    Skyper is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 94, Level: 1
    Level completed: 88%, Points required for next Level: 6
    Overall activity: 9.1%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Posts
    22
    Points
    94
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    10

    Default Re: Girl loves romance novels but claims she's not romantic .. what gives?

    Meteora: THAT'S what I'm talkin' about!

    T-Mal: Yeah, and her body language vs. what she says conflicts a lot too. Like once I was talking about some things that I thought would be fun and .. it was subtle but she was smiling .. again the, "eye smile" not the, "whatever" fake smirk. But then after she SAID things to the contrary .. "Sounds nice but .. " kinda thing. But the point is, I got to her emotional side just talking about it. That's my goal right now, to basically take over the role of the romance novel/love story movie in her life. (Gee sounds like a transfer of dependence! Lol!) And really, I don't see it as a bad thing as some might think. It's just recognizing that she wants this type of emotional stimulation and I'm just giving her what she wants, whether she realizes it or not.

    But in terms of, "romance" she's told me (and I've seen evidence to back this up) that she doesn't like things like flowers, holding the door open, etc. But she admits to being very emotional and does like to read about this stuff in other's lives (in books, movies, etc.). So obviously just likes the feelings of reading about it, whatever her hangups are about being the subject of such, "romance." So next time I get into one of these stories or whatever, I'm just gonna preface it with something like, "Hey, this is just something that happened to me .. not meaning to sound romantic or anything, just thought you might enjoy the story." You know, something to take that potential suggestion that I'm intending it as my plans for her and I at some point, right out of it, so that she's free to just enjoy it. After that, just keep at it and act as if I have no idea that what I'm saying could be taken that way, kinda like talking in a way that is obviously sexual but acting oblivious to that and giving the impression that I'm just being passionate .. as a way to bypass that damned logical part of the brain that blocks the good stuff from getting through. Lol!

    Just for kicks and clarity .. and because I believe there is an infinitesimally small chance of her or any of her friends ever seeing this post, I'll show you what she said, just in case I'm missing something that someone else might pick up on.

    When I asked her about romance novels and how it is she likes to read them but that she herself isn't romantic:

    You know I don't like flowers and romance things like that.
    I like the books and movies but I didn't say I would like that in real life.
    I'm emotional .. I get touched really easy by unreal stories.
    But if it happened to me I wouldn't like it. I would find it sad and too .. I don't know how to explain.
    I like to see but I don't like that happening to me.

  8. #18
    Skyper is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 94, Level: 1
    Level completed: 88%, Points required for next Level: 6
    Overall activity: 9.1%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Posts
    22
    Points
    94
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    10

    Default Re: Girl loves romance novels but claims she's not romantic .. what gives?

    Quote Originally Posted by T-Mal View Post
    All women define "romance" differently...
    For some it's flowers & love notes.

    For others, it's having someone make them feel safe & secure.

    Some of them also see "romance" as being appreciated & wanting to know their partner is thinking about them.

    Whatever it happens to be, the key point is that those things will flip her emotional triggers.
    Yeah .. and that's the thing too, finding out what she means and what she really wants, not what I think she wants. I had that experience just today of witnessing what happens when you give someone what you think will make her happy while ignoring what you know she really wants. I won't go into details but suffice it to say, everyone involved was miserable. It was a striking example. And the funny thing is, it would have taken something very very small, comparatively to make her happier than a pig in ----. I've learned this with this girl too .. after having a few times done things that I thought would wow her socks off, to find that something very simple produced far greater results. Again, details aren't necessary but, I made her something once, something I didn't know how to do and had to teach myself how. I could have just bought one for her but I was into the symbol of what it meant to make it for her myself. But that whole symbol was lost. She was more into the thing itself. Well, another time, I saw a need, so to speak and I knew what a concern it was for her so, I filled it. It wasn't anything huge .. not to me anyway .. but she was awestruck! Her eyes almost popped out and she was like, "Really?????" So yeah, it's all about finding what she really values and wants .. and I understand the material side .. just looking to start filling that emotional side too cause that's where all the magic is .. you can't buy attraction with things but you can help generate it with emotions so, that's where I'm setting my sights now .. see how it goes. Like Meteora said, if nothing else, I'm getting an education.

  9. #19
    meteora's Avatar
    meteora is offline PUA All Star
    Points: 14,800, Level: 78
    Level completed: 88%, Points required for next Level: 50
    Overall activity: 0%
    Achievements:
    Social10000 Experience Points31 days registered
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Location
    west virginia
    Posts
    1,667
    Points
    14,800
    Level
    78
    Thanks
    11
    Thanked 20 Times in 17 Posts
    Rep Power
    685

    Default Re: Girl loves romance novels but claims she's not romantic .. what gives?

    You know I don't like flowers and romance things like that.
    I like the books and movies but I didn't say I would like that in real life.
    I'm emotional .. I get touched really easy by unreal stories.
    But if it happened to me I wouldn't like it. I would find it sad and too .. I don't know how to explain.
    I like to see but I don't like that happening to me.


    looks like she's trying to game you, i think this is her way of playing "hard to get"

    "I didn't say I would like that in real life."
    if she didn't want it in real life she wouldn't have said this like this it was likely her subtle way of saying " your pursueing me and i'm the prize, come and get me" wemon like male attention, it makes them feel hot and bothered obviously she's craving your attention, keep up the good work

  10. #20
    Skyper is offline Aspiring PUA
    Points: 94, Level: 1
    Level completed: 88%, Points required for next Level: 6
    Overall activity: 9.1%
    Achievements:
    7 days registered
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Posts
    22
    Points
    94
    Level
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
    Rep Power
    10

    Default Re: Girl loves romance novels but claims she's not romantic .. what gives?

    Okay .. just to play devil's advocate, what do you think she would have said, if she really didn't want this? And what leads you to believe she's playing hard to get?

    And further .. is it possible that she really believes she doesn't want this stuff in her life but her actions are betraying her?

    Obviously, I know you are just hazarding a guess as you don't know her but .. I need some objective opinions, that's why I'm here. Thanks!

    One other thing .. about love stories in movies and books, this is another aspect that is confusing but it could just be the complexity of the female mind showing. Lol! Anyway, she will say one day things like here, that she's emotional and likes to read/watch this stuff. Other times, she'll say she watched a love story/movie and said, "Pfff .. that's so not the way it is in real life!" I've always thought girls loved that stuff because it's what they dream about and long for .. but here she's saying, she knows it's just a movie and not real .. love isn't like that in real life. (She's had a string of abusive relationships, culminating in a belief that love is just about pain.) But at the same time, there's something inside her that's drawn to these stories that touches her emotions. If it's just me .. knowing this about her I'd say that she's super conflicted. That she has a deep desire for something that she believes is impossible and unrealistic .. true love. So not to sound manipulative but, how do I use that to my advantage? How do I give this girl what her heart truly desires? All I can think now is to be able to bypass the logical thinking and touch her emotions directly but, her logically side is strong .. very strong.

    Sorry for the ramble .. just had to get that thought out.


Page 2 of 3 FirstFirst 123 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. We kissed, so now what? Please need help reviving an old romance:p
    By LBpua2012 in forum Approaching, Running Sets & Building Attraction
    Replies: 25
    Last Thread: 10-04-2012, 03:51 AM
  2. Getting her back - she claims we have no chemistry
    By Cause in forum Approaching, Running Sets & Building Attraction
    Replies: 7
    Last Thread: 08-26-2012, 09:26 PM
  3. Replies: 1
    Last Thread: 03-14-2012, 01:25 AM
  4. Girlfriends still loves me but wont get back with me
    By darkchild101 in forum How To Get Your Ex Back
    Replies: 2
    Last Thread: 11-07-2011, 03:23 AM
  5. The Ex that Loves you
    By Fisher in forum How To Get Your Ex Back
    Replies: 3
    Last Thread: 10-31-2011, 01:59 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
DMCA.com