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  1. #1
    Skyper is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Question Think I just experienced my first, honest sh1t test :p

    Just looking for comments about this. This looks like a classic sh1t test but since I've had little experience (because of my own ignorance) just seeing if I'm reading this right.

    Okay so, we're not bf/gf but we do have a relationship which honestly could go either way. It's also an LDR and much of our time together is spent online either in text or video chat. I could go into more detail but it's not necessary for this .. not interested in a discussion about LDRs .. just about this specifically. Now, with that disclaimer out of the way .. Heh ..

    We haven't talked in over a week and last night, she was online and I said hey. Just asked what's up, etc. the usual. Her answers were all short. So I took the bait and asked, "Everything okay? You haven't been around much lately." She said, "I had things to do." Typical response when obviously something's up but she is being tight lipped. So I said, "Don't wanna talk about it?" That's when she launched.

    Her: you really like to know everything
    Me: I never said that
    Her: yes you do .. even if i said by mistake a sad face or something ... you're like, lets talk about it, what is it
    Her: or when i miss a few days .. what happened ..are you ok, lets talk about it
    (we danced around this a bit and I commented on her comment, "I had things to do" here)
    Me: when i hear that from people .. it usually means something is up, something big
    Her: yes it was something big
    Her: but maybe i dont wana talk

    At this point, it's obvious that something's up. Could just be that it's raw and she's still feeling it and isn't ready to talk. Also, the guys in her life (from what I understand) have never really given 2 sh1ts or made the effort to want to know things about her life .. to show that they care. Could be that she's testing me on that? See if she can be cold and if I'll say, "Screw you then." I pretty much left it by giving a little back, telling her basically that look, I asked because I could sense that something had you upset and because I care and I do want to know. But if you really don't want to talk, just tell me and I'll respect that. Just don't get pissed at me for caring about you.

    She didn't say much after that .. we're gonna, "see each other" later this week. We'll probably play some games and have some laughs and at some point, I'll gently slip in something about what happened .. last time it wasn't to the fever pitch she was this time but, after a while together I asked, "Feeling better?" She said, "Yeah. " And then I asked if she wanted to tell me what got her upset and she did.

    It's weird that at my age I'm just now learning to see this stuff but, better late than never right? Lol! Any comments, thoughts, pointers are appreciated. Thanks again!

  2. #2
    Hopeful33's Avatar
    Hopeful33 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Think I just experienced my first, honest sh1t test :p

    i really like how you handled the situation great job man proud of you
    im on a different level

  3. #3
    Skyper is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: Think I just experienced my first, honest sh1t test :p

    Lol! Thanks Hopeful! Seriously though? I mean .. it's just weird. I'm the kinda guy that doesn't feel comfortable leaving stuff unresolved. Think it probably comes from being in the hospitality field for so long .. if there's a problem, you need to fix it to the satisfaction of everyone .. ie, everyone leaves smiling. But in this case, I had to state my view and then leave it be .. it still feels tense but then, maybe that's a good thing. Just counter-intuitive for me so that's why I'm looking for good, honest feedback. This is a case of what FEELS wrong may in fact be the best thing to do.

    Just gotta remember to switch gears when I go back to work and not p1ss off a client!

  4. #4
    Hopeful33's Avatar
    Hopeful33 is offline PUA Forums Respected Contributor
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    Default Re: Think I just experienced my first, honest sh1t test :p

    haha yea good job and dont piss of any clients !
    im on a different level


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