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  • 2 Post By Virgil
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Thread: When can you open with compliment?

  1. #1
    Schweinsberg is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default When can you open with compliment?

    This weekend I broke every rule of the opening and it appeared to work. It breaks so many rules, but we all know that depending on context, it’s the correct approach.

    There was a very pretty girl who was working at Target. She had very colorful hair, half dark, half blond. It was clear she spent some time on this, and she didn’t do it because she didn’t want anyone to notice. Somehow context seemed to suggest that a compliment would be better than a traditional neg. So walking by, over my shoulder I said “I like your hair!”

    Her face lit up like a Christmas tree, and she said “Thanks! You’re like, the only one who noticed!” She was clearly happy.

    Somehow I don’t think that it conveyed that I was hitting on her (Although it may have and she didn’t mind.) I was basically walking past and away from her the entire time (this was calculated, as a IOD, and to be non-threatening, I was “busy” and just “noticed” as I was passing.)

    I figured she was at work, during the day, and the context didn’t call for the usual Bitch Shield. (Usually only seen during evenings in club/bar settings due to the frame, the context that most men are clearly out to pick them up), or coming off as creepy (usually due less to content and instead a non-congruent delivery of material)

    Unfortunately I didn’t have the cojones to go back and close this particular one, and I wasn’t sure how to stack forward on her after this opener. But, it’s so much easier to open with something like this than a usual opener.

    What sort of frame could I create that makes this opener work more often? Why does it work when it does, or why doesn’t it?

    When can you compliment without the corresponding DHV, Negs, and iois that usually precede such a gambit?

  2. #2
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    Virgil is offline Moderator / PUA All Star
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    Default Re: When can you open with compliment?

    That opener is a direct opener. Judging by reading your post, I think you're only familiar with the Mystery Method/indirect game. There's a whole different side to PUA called direct game, which is all about honesty (as you were in this case). It's too much to just explain all of direct game here, so look up as much as you can on David X, Badboy and Sasha Daygame.

    And to answer your question: ALWAYS.

  3. #3
    Schweinsberg is offline Aspiring PUA
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    Default Re: When can you open with compliment?

    I have studied a few different systems, but you are absolutely right, 95% of my work has been done with The Mystery Method, and it's the framework that I use. The hallmark of any exert is knowing when to break the rules, and (although I'm no expert, and Mystery isn't the only "rule"), I felt as though I progressed by "feeling" that this situation was different due to context.

    It's clear, some people do walk right in and open directly, boldly, and apparently breaking all the "normal" rules. It seems to be, the most important thing is that, you can deliver almost any content, so long as you are congruent with it.

    I will look into the systems you provided. Any other suggestions here?

  4. #4
    Virgil's Avatar
    Virgil is offline Moderator / PUA All Star
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    Default Re: When can you open with compliment?

    Yeah, Alan Roger Currie if you have balls the size of a small car.


    It seems to be, the most important thing is that, you can deliver almost any content, so long as you are congruent with it.
    Very true.

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    Default Re: When can you open with compliment?

    With day game especially, a direct approach is usually better. And complimenting a girl isn't as "taboo" as it is for night game, like at a club.

    A woman's b1tch shield IS much lower during the day, because most guys won't approach them then.

    And remember: girls don't spend all that time & put in all that effort for no reason...
    They love it when a guy notices; so your "hair compliment" was perfect for that situation.



    Need one on one private coaching? PM me for details.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: When can you open with compliment?

    For the future, I would throw out some bait after the compliment. Complimenting gives them a sign that you ARE interested, but you can follow it up with something funny or otherwise ask them something to get them to display high value... for ex... (I'm assuming she is a counter culture chick just for arguement's sake)

    "Hey, I LIKE your hair!" (she says thank you blah blah)

    (Funny Response) "Wow it is cool... did you like lose a bet or something to have it colored like that?"

    *I have a funny story I would insert here about my friend who lost a bet and had to shave his head. You can do similar

    Alternate: (DHV response) "Man I was just thinking I've met some boring girls around this area lately ... then I run into you with this hair! (TOUCH THE HAIR, just a little, at the end) I just had to see if your as interesting as your fashion sense.

    After she responds, follow up with a quesetion or two about stuff you like a girl to be like personality wise.


    THE OTHER METHOD I HEARD SOMEWHERE (FROM ZAN):

    Walk up to her, say "Wow you (or her hair) are truly beautiful I just HAD to come over to tell you!" AND THEN WALK AWAY AFTER SHE SAYS THANKS.

    Come back after you shop (or while your on your way to a register or whatever) and say "I have to go ... busy all day... but you should give me your number so we can get some coffee sometime..."

    He uses this in clubs. The trick, according to him, is that you CAN NOT SO MUCH AS EVEN LOOK AT HER ALL NIGHT AFTER YOU SAY IT. Looking will destroy your High Value.

    Dont know if that one works in Daygame, just thought I'd put it out there.
    Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship.
    Oscar Wilde



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